I donated my eggs to a woman I met on the Tube

Victoria CookBBC London
News imageGini Bhogal Two women smile at the camera and hold a baby wrapped in a white blanketGini Bhogal
Gini (left) met Anita on the Piccadilly line in the early 1990s and decided to help her have a baby

Gini Bhogal smiles as she thinks back to the London Underground journey that changed her life.

It was the early '90s and she was with friends, squished on to a busy Piccadilly line train.

A child was making everyone laugh, which prompted a random conversation between Gini and the woman standing next to her - Anita.

They soon got talking about children and discussed Gini's then two-year-old son. Anita explained that she couldn't have children because of an issue with her eggs. She said she'd been looking for a donor, and Gini immediately felt an urge to help.

"It was something that I've always felt," Gini explained, "that I wanted to help someone, one person, at least."

'Never any doubt'

The two women left the train at the next stop and exchanged numbers.

Gini remembers Anita looking at her and asking: "Will you really help me?"

It was almost too hard for her to believe the offer being made to her.

But, Gini said her need to help, and to give to others, completely took over.

"The idea of giving was more at the forefront [of my mind], I mean it could have been any woman standing there and I would have still done it."

Gini's husband was initially sceptical.

"He thought I'd gone mad," Gini remembers. "He asked me: 'What if this child turns up on our doorstep 13 years later? What are you going to do then? And how are your children going to react?'"

Despite his concerns, Gini said there was "never any doubt in my mind", adding that her husband "came around, hesitantly".

The IVF journey

Gini explained how that decision started a special journey, not only for her, but for Anita too.

Gini began taking medication and was eventually able to donate 17 eggs. Ten became embryos, but the first nine attempts didn't survive the transfer into Anita's womb. Eventually, the 10th and final embryo worked, and Anita became pregnant.

Nine months later, Anita and her husband welcomed baby Christopher.

"We didn't have any agreements in place," Gini explains, "she could have walked away as soon as everything happened."

However, the women kept in touch, and Gini became "Auntie Gini", even when Christopher's family travelled the world for their jobs.

"They always sent me emails," Gini said, "and I sent him a gift for his first birthday.

"And, from there on, [Anita] would always send me emails or send me letters with pictures."

News imageChristopher Wedick Anita holds Christopher's hands as a toddler in an old family photo Christopher Wedick
Anita always made sure Christopher knew his "Auntie Gini", even when they lived abroad

Gini said whenever Anita and her family came to London, "they would always see me, even if they were stopping at the airport for one night on the way to somewhere else".

She said it "maintained the connection" between them.

But, Christopher never knew who Gini really was.

Then, three years ago, Gini's phone rang. It was Anita, who explained to her that she was about to tell Christopher the truth.

News imageGini Bhogal Gini and Anita stand with Christopher in the middle of a photo. They smile at the camera. Christopher is now in his late 20sGini Bhogal
Gini (left), Christopher and Anita nearly 30 years later

'The miracle baby'

Christopher smiles as he remembers the moment he found out. The sun shines on his face through a window in his Miami office where he is currently working. Home now though is El Salvador.

"Growing up, I had no inclination," Christopher said.

He explained the truth was easily hidden as both women are of Indian origin. "Anita is of Goan origin, whereas Gini is of Punjabi origin, and so they have a similar skin colour."

He said the day his parents told him the truth, it was on an online video call with Auntie Gini present.

The then-recent Covid pandemic and the desire to share Christopher's medical history prompted his parents to finally tell him, he explained.

"It was just phenomenal to experience. It was definitely a very emotional moment for me and my mother and Gini to sort of discover this truth."

This much bigger family, and "a second mum" was the beginning of a new path for Christopher.

"They consider me a miracle baby, because the process itself is so difficult and so tricky - especially back in the 90s.

"And so it really was a miracle sort of process, and it took three people to birth one child, you know?"

News imageChristopher Wedick Christopher as a small boy dressed as a cowboy, with his mother Anita in an old family photo Christopher Wedick
Christopher grew up not knowing the truth, but says it has been "phenomenal" finding out his origins

Later Christopher flew to the UK to spend time with his new family, and even joined them on holiday.

He remembers getting to know Gini and was struck by their similarities.

"The musician we liked was the same, which was Sade. We drank the same type of coffee, which was always black. We had a similar sense of humour, a little dark humour.

"I feel like my life and upbringing is very similar to that of nature versus nurture. I was nurtured by my mother, Anita, and I'm the nature of Gini," he said.

For Christopher, the experience has been positive, and as the two extended families learned the truth of what had been a closely guarded secret, they welcomed him with open arms.

"I wasn't sure what to expect from her family, but what I encountered was openness with no hesitation," Christopher explained.

For Gini, the biggest challenge was telling her parents, who are both "very strict Sikh", she explained.

At first she introduced Christopher as the son of a family friend, but then, with the support of her six siblings, Gini sat down and explained the whole story to her parents.

"My dad heard my story, looked at Christopher and exclaimed, 'Beta, I'm your Nana Ji', and my mum hugged Christopher and said, 'My son'".

They welcomed Christopher into the family immediately.

News imageChristopher Wedick Christopher and Gini smile at the camera somewhere warm and sunny, in a recent photoChristopher Wedick
Gini and Christopher are now regularly in touch, regardless of the miles between them

Gini and Christopher are continuing to grow their bond - "a bonus family", as Christopher calls it.

And, they have decided now is the time to share their story, with the blessing of Anita and their families.

Since sharing her story, Gina said she'd had "a lot of people, especially South Asian women, reach out to me saying that I've actually given them permission to talk about their own journeys.

"Nobody discusses infertility, nobody discusses egg donation because it isn't the bloodline."

Christopher has since been on the Piccadilly line, and still can't believe how a chance conversation on the London Underground helped to bring him into the world.

"It's so interesting to think that moment is what sparked my life," Christopher said.

"Since then, I've been able to help so many other people in their lives. I have a child on the way, so the cycle really flows.

"And I think, each and every one of us are here on this planet to do good, to help one another, to spread love and connection, and really make a difference in the world.

"And I feel like that's one of the things that I'm here to do."

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