29 July 2025

29 minutes

Available for over a year

Why is it so hard to say no? Whether it’s at work, with family, or in everyday social situations, many of us find ourselves saying yes when we really want to say no, then paying the price later in stress, burnout, or resentment.

In this programme, the doctors explore the psychology behind our reluctance to turn things down, and how we can become more comfortable protecting our boundaries.

They’re joined by behavioural scientist and physician Dr Sunita Sah from Cornell University , whose research reveals how social pressure, guilt, and even professionalism can get in the way of a simple two-letter word. Together, they explore why we struggle to say no, and offer practical strategies to help us do it more often, and with confidence.

If you want to get in touch, you can email us at [email protected] or WhatsApp us on 08000 665 123.

Presenters: Drs Chris and Xand van Tulleken

Guest: Dr Sunita Sah

Producer: Emily Bird

Executive Producers: Rami Tzabar and Jo Rowntree

Editor: Kirsten Lass

Assistant Producer: Maia Miller-Lewis

Tech Lead: Reuben Huxtable

Social Media: Leon Gower

Digital Lead: Richard Berry

Composer: Phoebe McFarlane

Sound Design: Melvin Rickarby

At the BBC:

Assistant Commissioner: Greg Smith

Commissioning Editor: Rhian Roberts

A Loftus Media production for BBC Radio 4