Parents ready to celebrate 'painful' Christmas six years after son's death

A grieving mother and father, who lost their only child in a hit-and-run six years ago, are planning to share gifts this Christmas for the first time since their son's death.

Rhys Dobson was 19 when he was killed while walking home along a rural road after a night out.

His father, Colin Dobson, said since his son's death, he and his wife "lock ourselves away and don't do anything" during Christmas.

However, six years on, the couple have finally bought each other gifts, after Rhys' mum, Trina, decided she did not want the pleasure of Christmas to be "taken away because of one person".

Security officer Rhys was out with friends from work when, unable to find a taxi, he decided to walk the three miles (5km) back to his home, in the Garndiffaith area of Pontypool, Torfaen.

He did not want to wake his parents to ask them for a lift.

But the popular young man never made it home.

Rhys' body was found by passers-by on the road between Blaenavon and his home shortly after 03:00 BST on 14 April 2019.

His family were "broken" by his loss, with Colin describing the festive period as particularly difficult in the grieving process.

"Christmas is for kids really," he said.

"All our focus, from when Rhys was little - all the way through - was to make it a good time for him."

Rhys' birthday was just six days before Christmas - he would have been 26 today.

"The enjoyment for us was seeing him enjoying it."

Since Rhys' death, Colin said he and Trina had wanted the Christmas period - including the time around Rhys' birthday - "to be over with", saying it was difficult to be "surrounded by all the joy when, for us, it was a really difficult, painful time".

The driver, Derek Richards, 43, from Blaenavon, was jailed for two years in 2021.

He had taken a potentially fatal dose of amphetamines, with more than three times the legal limit for driving found in his system - described by the judge as a "substantially aggravating feature" in the crash.

Data from Richards' Citroen C3 showed he was driving at 61mph (98km/h) when he hit Rhys. He claimed he did not stop because he thought he had hit some fly-tipped rubbish in the road.

Richards was jailed for three years, which was reduced to two years on appeal.

Colin, an accident and emergency nurse, said he "could not save the one life he wanted to".

"This cost me everything," he said. "I've had to give up my career because I couldn't carry on doing what I was doing."

However, Colin has felt able to return to volunteering as a mountain bike instructor at Bike Park Wales, near Merthyr Tydfil.

"Helping others to learn helps me," said Colin, who used to mountain bike with his son.

"The pain today is as raw as ever. But I've learned how to cope, so I don't break down in tears as much."

Every person will find their own way to manage the pain of grief, he added.

"Be gentle on yourself and don't always think, 'I should have done this or done that'," he advised.

"You can't change what happened."

There's no "magic bullet" to dealing with grief, said Colin, but counselling has helped him and Trina - who works for the council - to begin to heal.

"We just support each other," he said, of his wife, whom he has been with since they were teenagers.

A couple can "lean on each other", he said, but it is also hard "to unload" on a partner if one of you is having a bad day.

"Together we just kept going," Colin said.

This year, the pair have decided to "rebuild what used to be a joyous time" over the festive period.

"It’s not going to be the same - but it’s a step."