'We've been married for 75 years and never had a row'

Fiona CallowYorkshire
News imageBBC/Fiona Callow Tony and Joy sit side-by-side on a grey sofa, patterned with purple flowers. Tony is an older man with short white hair, and glasses. He wears a dark green jumper. Joy is an older woman, with short white hair. She wears a red blouse.BBC/Fiona Callow
Tony says he and wife Joy have not argued in their 75 years of marriage

A married couple who have spent the last three quarters of a century together believe there's no special secret to long-lasting love - and say despite being together for 75 years they have "never had an actual row".

Tony and Joy Bull first met as children when they grew up down the street from each other in Tooting, South London, before later tying the knot in 1951.

Now living together in a North Yorkshire care home, Tony, 95, says he and Joy, 94, have rarely been apart during the past eight decades.

Proving his point, the couple sit next to each other on a comfy sofa in Hambleton Grange Care Home's social area, holding hands and exchanging a smile when they recall a fond memory.

Joy has dementia and lives on a separate floor in the home so she can receive specialist care, but the pair spend as much time together as possible.

"We just enjoy each other's company, we like being together," he explains.

"I knew there was nobody else for me, and there never has been.

"I wonder if I'm one of the few men in the country that can say he has not had another girlfriend."

News imageHambleton Grange Care Home A black and white wedding photograph, in a silver frame.Hambleton Grange Care Home
Hambleton Grange gifted Tony and Joy a special frame for their wedding photo

After marrying in Tooting, Tony's father "graciously" gave him two nights and a day off from working on the family pig farm for their honeymoon in Bognor Regis, West Sussex.

"And I was damn fortunate to get that," Tony chuckles.

The newlyweds found their bliss quickly interrupted however, when their car broke down on the way, causing them to "limp" into the seaside town.

Rather than enjoying fish and chips by the coast, much of the next day was instead spent having the car fixed, before making the return journey home.

After moving up north and away from the family business, Tony worked at Buxted Chickens, ending his career as a managing director at Imperial Foods.

Joy worked as an early years teacher at Ripon Choir School.

The couple lived in North Yorkshire for many years, and Tony has fond memories of "popping out to take the dogs for a walk, down the river to Fountains Abbey".

"It's absolutely fabulous - those monks sure knew what they were doing," he says.

News imageHambleton Grange Care Home Tony and Joy sit side-by-side on a grey sofa, patterned with purple flowers. Tony is an older man with short white hair, and glasses. He wears a dark orange jumper. Joy is an older woman, with short white hair. She wears a brown knitted jumper dress. They both hold a plastic cups, and Tony has a plate of cake on his knee. In the foreground, an open bottle of prosecco can be seen. Hambleton Grange Care Home
Tony and Joy raised a toast to their wedding anniversary last month

They have four children, and the family unit has grown over the years to include 11 grandchildren and 21 great-grandchildren, who live across the UK.

Last month, Tony and Joy celebrated their diamond anniversary milestone with their family, complete with prosecco, cake and even a card from King Charles.

"Some of the grandchildren really couldn't believe it - [they said] 'is this from the King?'," Tony explains.

"It is quite an experience, quite unique".

Despite the years spent in each other's company, the pair have never had a proper argument, according to Tony.

"This is going to sound daft but I can't remember us having an actual row - ever," he smiles.

What could be the reason for that? Shared common interests could be the thing, with the doting couple enjoying animals, sport and music as a pair.

News imageTony and Joy look at old photographs and a newspaper-style anniversary card. . Tony is an older man with short white hair, and glasses. He wears a dark green jumper. Joy is an older woman, with short white hair. She wears a red blouse.
The couple share a love of sport, animals and music

When we visited, the colour of Joy's blouse links to one of Tony's favourite songs - Lady in Red, by Chris de Burgh.

"She's my lady in red," he says, smiling proudly.

While "people ask all the time" if there's a secret to achieving a long and happy marriage, Tony doesn't think he can put his finger on one single reason.

"Two people's chemistry is different everywhere but most of all you've got to be totally unselfish, give and take. It worked for us."

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