Police issue Valentine's Day romance scam warning

News imageGetty Images A text message with heart emojis on an iPhone reads: "I love you. can you send me some money"Getty Images
Romance fraud involves fraudsters creating fake online personas to exploit people for money

A police force has warned people to be cautious about so-called romance fraud during Valentine's Day.

The scam involves fraudsters creating fake online personas to gain someone's trust and affection through the guise of a romantic relationship, and ultimately exploiting them for money.

Det Insp Duncan Wynn, head of the central fraud unit at Thames Valley Police, called it a "form of emotional exploitation that can be deeply damaging, not just financially but psychologically".

An estimated £106m was lost by victims of romance fraud in the UK in the past financial year.

Fraudsters are known to manipulate, persuade and exploit victims, often encouraging them to isolate themselves socially and requiring urgency and secrecy.

In an alert posted about the scams, Thames Valley Police said Valentine's provided an "important opportunity to highlight how offenders groom victims, build trust, and exploit them financially".

"Romance fraudsters rarely begin by asking for money," it explained.

"They construct a detailed illusion of trust to draw victims in. They frequently share personal stories early in the conversation – describing their home life, work, ambitions, or future plans – to create emotional connection and credibility.

"Later, they reuse these same details as 'evidence' to support fabricated emergencies or financial requests.

"This form of manipulation mirrors behaviours seen in coercive control, blurring a victim's sense of what is genuine."

Police said a common warning sign was "manufactured urgency".

"Offenders often claim sudden illness, emotional distress or a crisis requiring immediate help.

"These stories are intentionally designed to distract victims from the underlying ask: money.

"If a victim hesitates, offenders may accuse them of lacking care or loyalty, applying deliberate emotional pressure to prevent them from seeking advice."

Police said fraudsters also encourage victims to keep the relationship hidden "under the guise of protecting something special".

"This emotional dependency allows offenders to disguise financial requests within stories of hardship: a health crisis, problems at work, or situations only the victim can resolve," the force said.

Det Insp Wynn said offenders operated with "patience, skill, and intent - they create a sense of closeness, then use that trust to isolate victims and apply pressure".

He added: "No genuine relationship will demand secrecy, urgency, or financial support.

"If something does not feel right, speak to someone you trust or seek advice early.

"Reaching out for help is not a sign of naivety - it is a vital step in protecting yourself."

Thames Valley Police has made available a booklet created in partnership with Dr Elisabeth Carter, an associate professor of criminology and forensic linguist, which outlines practical steps to recognise red flags.

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