August 2009Slap!Slap!!You have the right to slap me for being late here.:)
Welcome you all to my world for one month.I am not giving you a lot of promises but I am sure I am gonna enjoy this month with blogging and your valuable comments.
Now let me introduce myself.I did my Computer Science Engg in Kerala,a state in India and I worked as a Software Engineer for more than one year.Soon I realized that I was not born to be a software engineer for the whole life where I can do nothing but coding.As I prefer human interaction to computer interaction I quit my job.Now I am preparing for Bank jobs where I can interact with public and also I can manage people working with me.This month is full of bank exams for me but I will be here for sure.
Now a special hi to my teacher Kieran :)
From my childhood I have always been a naughty student :), who doesn't do homeworks regularly and who gets punishment from teacher often for talking in class.But I always managed to get good marks and my teachers like me.Here also I guess at the end of this month I will be your good student :)
How I am here ?
Two months before one fine morning I decided that I will learn to speak English fluently.I searched in Google and my search ended up in this site.Just after 10 minutes I was sending a mail to bbc to get a chance to be the blogger of the month.After 2 months my dream came true.But unfortunately now I am in a hostel and I don't have a computer here.So I have to write from Internet cafe(Rs.30/- per hour).Anyway thats all for now.
Your comments are valuable to me and it will keep me going.In my next post, I will come up with a lot of interesting things.Just for you!!
Signing off,
Asha posted on Monday, 03 August 2009 | comment on this postArranged marriage ?Yesterday my mom called and gave me a lot of E numbers.Hold on.I will tell you what an E number is.But promise me that you don't laugh.
In my place people don't usually go for love marriage.I mean it is wrong to fall in love.Here there is a tradition called arranged marriage.Our parents will choose a partner for us and we will marry that person.Earlier, the search was through brokers, who used go from home to home with lots of photos of grooms and brides.Now as internet is booming up we have lot of matrimonial sites.Coming back to E number, it is the register number of a person who has registered in matrimonial site(www.bharatmatrimony.com).We can get all the details of that person with that E number.So now you may have guessed that I have reached my "marriage age".True. :)
It is really a difficult process to find out your life partner.Next step after getting details of the person is matching of the horoscopes.My parents very well believe in horoscopes and they afraid that if I get married without horoscope match then my marriage life will not be a success.Oh God..Then comes his financial position,job,status,his parents jobs and character,his grandparents jobs,his parents' sibling's character and a hell lot of things.I always wonder whether I am going to marry his grandparents or him??
Why should we go deep into his family details and all.I don't believe that a person from a good family can always be good and a person from a bad family will always be bad.It can happen the other way too..Its time to get out of this conventional arranged marriage system.But as I have not found a person who suits me or as I haven't loved a person till now, I agree to my parent's wish and let them search for the perfect match.After all they are retired government employees and searching my partner is their new job. :)
So friends, we can have a discussion about marriage in your place too..Send me your comments okay..
Update: My laptop has reached my house.I will get it on 16th.After that I am gonna bore you with a lot of posts :) posted on Tuesday, 11 August 2009 | comment on this postTwo things..Anticipatory bail :
This post is not so well written.I mean not so arranged.It is not because that I don't value your precious time.But I was not getting anything to write..Hope you will pardon me..
For the last few days I have been thinking of a nice post to write for you.But was not getting anything.Today I asked my friends to tell a nice topic.All the people whom I asked told me to write about India's culture.I think you all know about India's culture very well or you can get it from a lot of sites.So here I will tell you what I like most in my country.Unlike other countries, each state in India is like a small country.There are 28 states and 7 union territories(If i am not wrong :) ).Each state has it's own language.When some states in North are facing drought now, in my state it is heavily raining.People of one state differ from the people of other states in the way of dressing, food, language, celebrations and almost everything.Even though there are a few problems on religion etc. we all live in unity, with a feeling that we are INDIAN.This unity in diversity attracts me a lot.I will write in detail after sometime..
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Before starting the post let me ask you two questions
1.Why is ten afraid of nine?
2.What increases the width of a road?
No cheating.Think of the answer and if you failed then you can scroll down and find the answer.
Now two happy news 1.I got through officer's test in a Bank (Federal Bank) here.
2.I got my laptop.
Now coming to the post.India is a country where we give a lot of importance to our culture. Real India is neither what you see in movies like Slum dog millionaire nor what you read in books like The white Tiger.To know the real love and to experience the innocence of people here you must come and live here for sometime.But let me warn you, at first you will have to struggle a little because there will be people who exploit foreigners.So you should be careful too.
Now coming to the point.Today I had a debate with my friends on homosexuality.I am writing this post to get your valuable comments on this.One month before Delhi High Court decriminalized homosexuality.i.e it struck down the provision of Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code which criminalized consensual sexual acts of adults in private, holding that it violated the fundamental right of life and liberty and the right to equality as guaranteed in the Constitution.This landmark judgment was welcomed by gays and some supporters but most of the people are afraid of this.They fear that this will affect our culture.Personally speaking, our culture is something I am proud of.Let me point out some differences..Here we give a lot of importance to family life.Parents are like friends to us but we respect them a lot(i.e., we don't tell anything against them.We are really obedient).We don't earn money doing part time business.We are dependent on our parents till we complete our studies(at the age of above 20).We give importance to married life.And a lot more things.Coming back to the point, when homosexuality is legalized people fear that this will spoil our culture.What I am afraid is, will this increase the number of homosexuals in our community?If it is not legalized people will think that this is wrong and they will try to be normal.But when permission is granted for them, they will go in that way itself.I am not saying that homosexuals are going in the wrong way.But if the whole world is full of homosexuals it will also be not good right?There is a quote which has influenced me a lot.Let me share that with you now. "If the whole world followed you, would it be a nobler world?" Likewise if homosexuals try to answer the above question, I don't think they will be able to give a YES for this question.Because if the whole world followed them, it will be the end of this world right?I don't mean to hurt anyone.Why I am saying all this is, I know a person who is a cross dresser.At nights he dresses like a woman.He struggled to get rid of his habit.He tried a lot.Then he came to know that there is a community for cross dressers in America and in some other countries.After hearing that, he is not even trying to be normal.Like the same case, will legalization of homosexuality results in increased number of homosexuals?I need your opinion on this, to know how is homosexuality viewed in your place.
In my next post I will write about a celebration in my state, Onam. :)
Now the answer for the questions I asked:
1.Why is ten afraid of nine?
Because 7 8 9 (Didn't get??c'mon..read it slowly.Seven ate Nine)
2.What increases the width of a road?
ans : b (broad)
Now don't come and hit me :) I got this questions from my cousins studying in 5th and 6th standard :)
Thank you all for the comments to my previous post.I will reply soon.. posted on Saturday, 22 August 2009 | comment on this postComments - Arranged marriageI am really happy to read all your comments.Everyone has described the marriage system of their place.Thanks a lot for taking your time to comment on my post.
And one thing I want to make clear is I am not totally against arranged marriage system.I was happy to read Kieren, my teachers post about this topic.Without much explanation he has really understood what I meant in that post.
I hope that you will give the same response to my new post too :)
Now individual reply..
Vijay,Rabail,Kuldeep,
Thanks a lot for your comments.I understood all the points you told.I know marriage is not only a bond between two persons but also a bond between two families.
Pilar,
But this arranged marriage system is going on well in our country.I mean there are not much number of divorces.Girls wait for her person.She doesn't fall in love with others before marriage.After marriage whoever he be, she will treat her like God.
James,
What you told is very correct.My parents used to tell wedding is not a bond between two individuals, but it is a bond between two families.
Ewa,
Actually sometimes I think this is a good system.Earlier we were not allowed to talk to our man before marriage.Only on the wedding day bride will be able to see him.But now it is advanced.We can talk and decide whether he suits us or not.So it is okay.
Marwan,
Thanks for your wishes :).Here also marriage is based on love and affection.The difference is after getting married only we will start to love.
Emily,
I don't think I will fell in love with a stranger. :).Thanks for your wish.
Valeria,Ramilton
True.I can understand my parents and they can understand me too.They have given me full freedom but I don't want to misuse it.I have the freedom to say no if i didn't like a person.It is not like they will force me to marry a person whom I don't like.They are very sweet parents :)
Antonio,
I like that piece of information :)
Nadin,
It is all luck right?whether it is arranged marriage or love marriage..and about slumdog millionaire..I have watched that movie.I will tell you what, India is like two different countries.Half of the people in a darker world and the other half in a brighter world.In that movie you can see the darker India.Come to India sometime :)
Aigali,
It is 100 % true. :)
Henrique,
Divorces are less in arranged marriage system.People adjust to their partners and live happily.They don't get divorced for silly reasons.
Teresa,
Thanks a lot :)..I too hope for the best!!
Cherry,
True.This is a way to protect our culture.
Kiki,
Thanks for your valuable comment :)..I too like a arranged cum love marriage. :)
Rudolf,
Thanks a lot for your valuable comment.What you told about personal decision is very true.And you are only 37 rt?You have time to find out your right person. :)
Raquel,
Are you talking of the movie "Bride and Prejudice"? It is also like this.Arranged marriage is long lasting when compared to love marriage.So here marriage life is going on well.
Ann,
I liked your comment.What you told is very true.And I am also not against this system.What I like is arranged cum love marriage.I am not upset ok :).My parents are really sweet and I hope I will get a good person :)
Naheed,
Thank you for your comment and also for your wishes :)
Doni,
I took your advice :) I liked that saying "with a good luck".
Marikas,
Here, virginity is something which girls treasure like anything.If we lose virginity we even suicide.So having a sexual life before marriage doesn't happen in a large number.I too think this is the right way.Let me ask you a question.What if two persons don't want to marry after getting a child?I mean what will happen to that child?
Ingrid,
My prayers for you to find out your right person.
Thu Thảo,
Your English is very good man.So in which standard are you studying?And about improving English, you try to send a mail to bbc and you will get the chance to be a blogger or at least you can start your own blog.If you want any help to start a blog of your own, ask me I will help.Write a lot and your English is gonna improve.All the best!
Agata,
True.What times :)
Fabulous,
Is it your real name?Then that name is fabulous :)
Sara,
I am hearing the medical test thing for the first time.I don't know when it is gonna come to our country.Due to large number of diseases I think this is a good measure.
Royal Dominic,
Thank you.
Lucy,
I really really liked your comment.I have an E number.Yeah yeah so you are gonna find a person for me :).I will give you my e number after sometime.Now I am shy :)
Satya,
I loved that kutti call :).I was in Hyderabad for more than one year.In hitec city.Where do you stay?
Simo,
Wow..Globalisation in marriage is a brilliant idea!!
Laura,
It is all luck..
Rashna,
Welcome.You try to send a mail to bbc and you will get the chance to be a blogger or at least you can start your own blog.If you want any help to start a blog of your own, ask me I will help.Write a lot and your English is gonna improve.All the best!
Machado_Assis,
I too like meeting other people and their culture.Thank you for your comment.
Regis,
If a person is having similar status as mine then it is not wrong to love that person.If he is in any other religion or something then it will not be accepted.
Boska,
How swweet...I was really missing this
Arthur,
You are very correct.I know people who are happily living even after arranged marriage.
Thiago,
What you told about feel is very true.
Anderson,
Thank you
Taru,
You understood it :). I will go through that link very soon.Is it that site from where we can understand which type of person we are?Have you read Fountain Head by Ayn Rand?
posted on Sunday, 23 August 2009 | comment on this postOur traditionsThose who are busy can avoid reading the italicized section.Others go on..
Till this day I was really busy and I told you about internet cafe issue.Money was not the matter but I didn't get time to think and write a post from the cafe.Whenever I go there, there will be a big queue because that is the only cafe nearby our place.If I get a system also, I will use it for a few minutes because others will be waiting out.In the evening our classes will be over by 7 PM.After that girls don't used to go out.So I was really in a pathetic situation.Now the situation has changed.Even though there is no net connection I have a laptop with me.So I can write posts from hostel and can publish it from cafe. :)
You won't believe what I did yesterday.Yesterday for the first time I read my teacher's blog from the cafe.As I was really impressed by his post, I didn't want to miss any part of it.So I copied all his posts and comments to my USB and in the night itself I read it completely.I enjoyed reading it so much that I completed reading it in a stretch.Good jokes and good teaching style.I am very lucky to have a teacher like him.One day I too want to be like him or like some readers who have a good command over English.Going through the comments, I felt sad at times when I realized that you are all are angry with me for being irregular.I hope now you can understand me.Even I was missing my teacher and all my readers.
Hoi hoi..So now everyone give me pardon and give me a sweet smile :)
Now here is a post for you.In this post I will write some traditions* in our place(South India or Kerala) which you won't see in other sites.
1.In our place we used to take bath regularly.Don't laugh.Let me complete :).Bathing is not so easy.We have to apply oil in our hair.We used to rub our skin using scrubber which is a natural thing we get from coconut tree.Let us call it coconut fibre(chakiri in my language malayalam) for I don't know its exact English word.Now for those who don't know what a coconut is, imagine a small ball covered with brown color fibrous husk.There are 3 parts.  The outer fibrous portion is used as scrubber and it has various other uses also.It is used as fuel for natural stoves(We burn it like we burn wood).Second part, that is the covering of the ball is a hard shell.Inner part of the covering is a white colored meat which we use to cook cake and curries.Third is the inner vacuum portion.It is filled with it's juice which we drink.These scrubbers are replaced by plastic scrubbers now.But in rural places this is used even now.My state Kerala got it's name from these coconut trees.It is called kera in malayalam.Land of kera - Kerala.Now you can imagine the significance of coconut in our life.And about bathing, I think we give lot of importance in keeping our body clean.After excreting we are satisfied only if we wash our hands and anus using water.Tissue paper is being used now a days in big companies here.But we are not fully satisfied with it.
2.We used to offer coconut and flowers to God.Just go to some temple in your place and tell me whether there also flowers are given to God.Coconuts are given as a bribe to God to fulfill our prayers :).We have to break the coconut by striking it in a specially designed stone in front of the temple. If it is broke properly, our wish will be done and if not, the heart of the person will also broke with the coconut because we believe that it is a bad sign.We will get a few flowers and sandal(a type of tree) paste from the temple in a small piece of plantain leaf.We will apply sandal in our fore head.Scientifically it is told that applying sandal paste on our fore head is good for nerves.It has good cooling effect.But we are supposed to apply it only after bathing.Also, we are not allowed to enter the temple or even it's premises without bathing or during mensuration.
3.Here, married women apply kumkum, a red coloured powder on their forehead. A small line is drawn with this powder half on the hair and the other half on the forehead.They also wear a 'thali' (a small pendant).This tali is given to her by her partner.This is similar to the wedding ring which you all know.We are supposed to wear it till our death or our partner's death.Tali gives s special feeling for a woman that they do not keep it carelessly over somewhere.This kumkum and tali is to identify a married woman and men are not supposed to look them in a wrong way.
4.We used to wash dishes using ash or tamarind.Now it is replaced by dish wash bar.Now guess what is used as scrubber?Yes, our coconut fibre. :)

5.Here, women neither drink nor smoke.We can't even imagine such a thing.But now, due to the influence of western culture working girls have started going to pub and it is a big issue now.You know what, this year some people protested celebrating valentine's day as it doesn't suit our culture.They told that if they see a girl and a boy together on a valentines day they will make them marry.But modern girls stood against this and they sent pink underwear to the protesters to show their protest.
6.In the evening, we lit lamp and pray in front of pictures of millions of Hindu Gods.
7.When we set out for some thing important in our life, we touch feet of our elders(parents/teachers etc) for their blessings.
8.On occasions like Birthdays and celebrations like Onam,Vishu etc., we don't eat non vegetarian food.
9.Killing of cows is illegal as it is considered as God's animal.Earlier, in our place, non vegetarians used to eat only chicken, lamb and egg.Now, beef and pork are also in the list.These are the common meat types available here.Before killing animals we used to say a small prayer.
I wanted to write 10 points.But I am getting sleepy now and dead tired.Ha!It is 1.30 AM.Let me go and sleep now or I will not be able to listen in my class tomorrow..Good night and sweet dreams :)
*All the above said points are not applicable to all people in my place.It depends on place, religion etc.
If you have any doubts on this ask me.I don't know whether I have succeeded in explaining coconut and all.Anyway I am here and so clarifications can be done. :)
Photos Courtesy : Google
Signing off,
Asha posted on Monday, 24 August 2009 | comment on this postOnam time :)Today I am gonna tell you about Onam, a festival in my place. :)
Onam celebration is going on here.It started on 23rd of this month (Atham day), 10 days before Thiruvonam.It is tied with the memory of the golden age of prosperity.Now, as I am in hostel I am not able to celebrate Onam.But I remember Onam celebration in my childhood days.Starting from Atham day, for the next ten days we make a carpet of flowers on our courtyard.
 Early morning we wake up and cow dung is plasterd on the courtyard in a circular shape.Then flowers are kept on it.In my childhood we used to go searching for flowers in early mornings.That experience was really nice.Many small girls with a small basket going to to neighbouring houses and fields to collect flowers.On Thiruvonam day(just after these 10 days) we get new dress(Onakkodi) from the eldest member of our family.Women wear set saree(cream coloured saree with golden border), a traditional saree of Kerala.Everyone wear new dress on that day.Then we have a grand lunch called Onasadhya.There is a saying that "kaanam vittum onam unnanam" which means we should have this lunch even if we have to sell all our things.Main course is rice.With rice various kinds of dishes like upperi(fried banana in oil), pickle, lot of other curries and paayasam(dessert) will be there.
 Now talking of Onam, this is a harvest festival. After the rain-drenched month of Karkidakam(a malayalam month like our zodiac signs), Chingam is a welcome month for people in the state of Kerala. The festival is a harbinger of spring — signalling the start of the harvest season.Story behind is Onam is very interesting.Here it goes for you :)..
We have demons and demigods(asuras and devas).One day, Indra, the king of Devas went to war with Mahabali(Bali), the king of Asuras and in that war Bali succeeded and proceeded to occupy Indra's territory.Mahabali's rule is considered as the golden era of Kerala.We can hear a song all over Kerala during Onam time which describes the rule of Mahabali.It goes like this..
"When Maveli (Mahabali) ruled the land,
All men were treated equally.
there were no lies and no cheating
And no one was false in speech"
Devas were very annoyed(jealous) as Mahabali became the ruler of all the three worlds.They approached Vishnu(Main God) and asked for his help.God told them their prayers will be answered.One day Mahabali, who was performing a sacrificial rite (Aswamedha Yagna) on the banks of Narmada River, declared that he would give anything that anyone sought from him during this Yagna.At this time, Vishnu, incarnated in the form of a dwarf named Vamana came near mahabali.Mahabali's guru who had a vision of future understood that the one who had come to take alms from Bali was not an ordinary Brahmin but Lord Narayana Himself had assumed this form. He advised Bali not to promise the lad anything.But Bali was a King who gave importance to his word.He told his guru that he can't take back his word.When asked Vamana what does he want, he told that it was enough to give him that much of land covered by three footsteps of him.bali agreed and then Vamana grew in size until he towered above the heavens. With the first foot, he measured all of the earth. With the other, he claimed all of the heaven. There was still one foot of territory that Bali owed him.So Bali asked to place the third step on his head and Vamana placed the third step on the head of Bali and suppressed him to the underworld.As a last wish Mahabali was granted the permission to visit his subjects once a year. Thus, Keralites celebrate Onam festival to commemorate the memory of a Great King Mahabali who would keep his promise.Onam thus marks the homecoming of legendary King Mahabali.
Every malayalee believe that on Thiruvonam day, King Mahabali will come to visit them.That is the reason why we decorate our houses with flowers and traditional lamps.These are all done to welcome Mahabali.
During Onam, people who dress like Mahabali comes to every house(in the same way as Santa Clause visit us).He has an umbrella with him which is made of some sort of leaves.There is another group who dress like tigers and visit out homes during Onam.I guess if Mahabali visits Kerala now, he will be depressed of the pathetic situation. :(.His umbrella is missing in the picture.
Although this festival has its origin in Hindu mythology, Onam is celebrated by all people irrespective of class and creed.I didn't tell you what I like most in Onam celebrations.Guess what?Our schools will be closed for 10 days :) and I love Onam vacation..The next thing I love is to show off my new dress to all my friends.The first day after vacation we are allowed to wear colour dress(All other days we should wear uniform ).Not finished..The third thing I love is the flower carpet competition.We draw a big design on the floor and create a flower carpet.When I was in college, our class got first prize :)
I don't know whether I will get vacation in the institution where I study now.Lets wait and see..
By the way Happy Onam to all my friends :)
Signing off,
Asha
Photo courtesy : Flickr
posted on Thursday, 27 August 2009 | comment on this postTime to say good bye/comments of 3 postsHi all,
Today is my last day here as a blogger.As promised I couldn't write so many posts but I think I gave you some information about my place.If you have any questions about my country feel free to ask me. Anyways I haven't decided to go from here.I will be here commenting to the posts of our coming month's blogger :).
I would like to thank each one of you for taking time to write loooooooong comments to my post :)
And thank you my teacher :)
Comments - Onam
Soroush,Nasir uddin,Henrique
Thank you for dropping by..I got ten days leave and reached my home.Because of the travel and all I got sick and couldn't post as I planned.As today is my last day here I came out to cafe to tell you all good bye..see ya... :)
Comments - our traditions
Ewa,
I hope your print outs were not waste :)
Pilar,
True.We too don't want to lose our culture.
Henrique,
Malayalam is my mother tongue.In my state Kerala everyone speaks in Malayalam.BUt we have English medium schools where English is compulsory.In my institution I speak in English.We know Hindi also which is our National language.Not complete..I know little bit of Tamil and Telugu,languages spoken in my neighbourhood states :)
Nasir,
:)
Olga,
Next time you come to India don't forget to visit Kerala.It is really beautiful.. :)
Olya,
There i s no one language which everyone know.But ya we can adjust with English and Hindi.
And about your girlish question..I liked it :) We used to apply coconut oil in our hair.I guess thats the secret behind this shining hair:)
Rabail,
Thank you so much for your comment.There is no rule like how many times we have to go.When we wish to go to temple we will go.Early morning or in the evenings.Sandal paste is provided by "pujari"(like the priest in the church).
Naheed,
Thank you..I guess Indian and Pakistan tradition and culture is almost the same.
Konstantin,
You are right.That red dot is called bindi which is used for style.But I was speaking of the red coloured line on her head.You can see that in the picture.It is kumkum..I guess your doubt is cleared.
Navneet,
Oh..I am really sorry..I would have told you about it if I had time.But today is my last day.. :(
Comments - Two things
Soroush,fabulous,
Thank you so much for putting down your valuable thoughts.. :)
Boska and Wude,
Thank you :)
Jack,
After eating 9,seven will eat 10 right?Thats why 10 is afraid.Got it? :)
I don't feel like going from here :(
Advanced all the best to next month's blogger :) posted on Monday, 31 August 2009 | comment on this post | August 2009
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