The Messenger of the Gods

by Maya Stoll

The parties hosted by Zeus were the best on Mount Olympus. Invitations were jealously sought by young and old. Nectar and ambrosia were in lavish supply, the music was sublime and the surroundings were incomprehensibly luxurious. Day after day the festivities continued, with radiant Gods and Goddesses partying amongst the Ancient Greek pillars and statues. The air was filled with the clink of goblets, laughter and chatter carrying on the warm breeze.

One time-honoured guest, however, was not taking part. Hermes, messenger of the Gods, was sitting sullenly in a corner, sighing and frowning angrily.

"What's the matter with you?" Zeus asked. "You usually enjoy yourself at my parties."

"It's not the party," snapped Hermes, "It's him!" He shot a dagger-sharp glare at a crowd of admirers surrounding Telecos. "What chance have I got against all that new technology?"

Zeus glanced at Telecos as he had all the latest gadgets: touchscreen armour, virtual reality helmet and the shield of Blockchain. Zeus nodded. "I see what you mean."

Hermes was just too old-fashioned to be a modern god of communications.

"Perhaps I should make you the god of something else," Zeus pondered aloud, "like...key-cutting or cake baking?" Hermes seemed to crumple up like an old toga. He was being side-lined by the new kid on the Olympic block.

At that moment, laughter erupted like Mount Vesuvius from the gaggle of admirers crowding around Telecos. Hermes suddenly felt as if a green fire had ignited inside him. He let out a jealous hiss.

"Telecos, if you could stop your incessant twittering, I challenge you to a duel!"

"Is that damp sandals I can smell? Ah yes, Hermes..." Telecos mocked him.

"Well, you... solar panelled fool, I bet I can deliver a message to Delphi and be back quicker than you can send your message."

"Challenge accepted," Telecos laughed. "You know, winged sandals are sooo... 490BC!"

Hermes, determined, left immediately. Meanwhile, Telecos, distracted, carried on partying. Hermes' well-worn but trustworthy sandals flapped and fluttered ceaselessly as he raced high above Greece, braving all manner of flying conditions. Exhausted, he reached his destination and with weary pride delivered the message to the oracle of Delphi.

Telecos was too busy showing off to worry about Hermes. Only when he saw Hermes' fluttering form on the horizon flying back did he think about sending his message. He frantically attempted to switch on his high technology messaging tool; nothing happened. His palms grew clammy and he became suddenly serious. Paralysed, the screen remained blank. The message would not send.

At that moment, victorious Hermes returned triumphantly.

"Message delivered!" he cried jovially. Telecos was sweating and desperately pressing buttons.

"Have you tried plugging yourself in?" Hermes giggled, pointing out the empty plug socket.

Hermes then strolled towards a crowd of new admirers and the party was in full swing once more. Zeus gave him a Cheshire Cat grin and an imperceptible wink. Hermes was the messenger of the gods once more.