How the Square became a Rhombus

by Daniel Lundie

Once upon a time, a long time ago, there lived a perfect shape: Mr Square. He was the squarest of them all; he lived in a perfectly square house with perfectly square rooms, with perfect square windows. In that house with Mr Square lived the most perfectly magnificent square dog ever seen by the world. At the front of the house, besides his perfect square door was a square number plate which had the perfect letter four emblazoned on it: the perfect number.

One particular, and soon to be fateful day, Mr Square decided he would go and visit the city of Rhom (or as it was better known locally: the city of imperfection). This, however, would soon prove to be his first mistake. Mr Square could not drive so he had to catch the bus. In order to reach the bus stop Mr Square needed to cross the square-about. Foolishly, without looking, he sprinted across the busy road. This proved to be his second mistake. Now the approaching bus was travelling at exactly sixty-four miles per hour (the perfect square number speed) and, yes, you guessed it... SPLAT! It hit our hero, square on!

Mr Square was knocked unconscious and was rushed to the nearby hospital in a Squambulance.

After two square (four) weeks of being in hospital, Mr Square finally awoke; the nurse immediately informed the doctor who came running into the ward. The doctor noticed something especially peculiar about Mr Square but he decided to remain silent as he was aware Mr Square may have been upset by it.

Later that day, Mr Square was released from the hospital and went back home. When he reached the front door he realised he couldn't get through no matter what angle he tried. He thought, at first, that maybe he had gained weight at the hospital: after all, he was always right because of his angles. So, he decided to go and stay in the local hotel until he figured things out. On the way, he caught a glimpse of himself in a puddle and saw instead of all right angles, he had wrong angles. He was very upset and cried for a few minutes until Mrs Isosceles noticed him. She walked over to him and kindly told him you don't have to be perfect to be successful. That cheered him up instantly.

Sometime later, after considering his position, Mr Square realised that his new shape was permanent. So he renamed himself Mr Rhombus (after the town Rhom and the bus that changed his life forever). Mr Rhombus and Mrs Isosceles decided to marry and had a perfect ceremony which was held in a triangular prism.
Shortly after, they started a family and Mrs Isosceles had many baby parallelograms, all of whom, together with the dog, frequently had their parents running around in circles. Most importantly, the former Mr Square was happy and learned that wanting perfection in life was not everything: happiness far outweighed trying to be perfect.