When everything around you is new and exciting, your brain is constantly busy and learning.
Having a solid sense of routine is your secret tool to begin building your child's understanding of how the world works.
Here are some tips for how to manage setting these essential routines…
Melishah: I'm not really calm when things go out the window!
The routines are so different because one's seven weeks old and one is three and a half. With Ibrahim the routine is on a day-to-day basis so knowing what's going to happen the day for example on Monday he goes to the library and Tuesday he goes to gymnastics, Wednesday he goes to play group.
I just think it's really important for him to know the day before what's happening because he just gets really excited for the next day and asks a lot of questions and I think when he knows what's going on and where he's going it does make him a lot happier than if he doesn't know what's coming next.
With Ismail only being seven weeks old he kind of drinks his milk and he's straight out after bath time. Because he's had a bath every night since he was born, he knows it's bedtime straight after and he'll have a really long stretch of sleep after that. And I've realised the days I missed his bath times, he kind of wakes up after an hour and he's kind of wingy. It's like he knows.
When I put Ibrahim down to bed, he loves to put his own fan on, he loves to put his own sound machine on and then he'll have a song and then he'll go to sleep and if any of those are changed, it kind of disrupts the routine and it always has to be him doing the fan or him doing the sound machine for that routine to be counted otherwise we'll have a full-on tantrum.
When I was a first-time parent it was a lot harder to maintain a routine because I didn't know kind of what routine I needed to be in for my child but being a second-time mother now I'm kind of using the same routine as Ibrahim and I adjusted it a little bit because every single child is different but it's a lot easier this time around.
When the routine changes I notice a really big difference in the kids. Ibrahim was actually up quite a lot last night because he had a little bit of a later bedtime and Ismailan did have a good stretch of sleep but then he was up for most of the second half of the night so I think it does have an impact because they don't kind of know what's going on.
With kids every single day is different and you can't be too hard on yourself when the routine don't go to plan. Just stick with it and eventually it will work out.
Why are routines important?
Routines can be helpful, as they help us build habits
But they are especially important for children, as it can help them find their feet when it comes to things like going to the potty and sleeping, and make it easy for parents to plan their care.
Routines are also great for building independence in your little one, as it gives them a sense of what jobs need to be done and when.
It’s important to keep your child involved in these routines – eventually they might even learn the steps themselves.
Start with sleep
Your child's sleep routine is one of the first you'll want to iron out.
Sleep is likely to have a big impact on your child’s mood.
You might face a bit of 'push back' at first when you are starting to introduce a bedtime routine - this is totally normal and not something to worry about.
You can help your child recognise signs of sleep, by using simple language like, “you look sleepy” or, “that was a big yawn!”
For more details head to our article on putting together sleep routines.
Adjust the plan for each child
Each child is unique, so if you have multiple children you might need to adjust routines to meet their individual needs.
Pay attention to their behaviour and over time you can build what you notice into their schedules.
For example, curious children might ask lots of questions before bed, or worried children might need a cuddle before going out.
It can also be helpful to inform carers and other people who support your child of any routines they have – as this means you can keep them in place consistently while you're away.
Build play into the routine
Some routine tasks can’t be avoided, and it can be frustrating if they are a daily struggle.
One way around this is to try and bring fun into regular routines – is there a way to play with some toys at bathtime, or read with a teddy before bed?
This helps you improve your bond with your little one, as you can feel emotionally connected when you learn together.
When they are having fun, you’ll enjoy it more too and it makes things a lot easier to get things done.
Don't be too hard on yourself
It can be super easy to get caught up in trying to be perfect.
This can be stressful and difficult to manage, and it’s easy to start comparing yourself to other families who seem to have it all figured out.
It’s important to remind yourself that consistency is better than perfection.
We all have bad days sometimes where the routine will go out of the window, but you will feel the benefits if you can keep to it even some of the time.
And the more practice you have with routines, the easier they will be to maintain.
