Stayed in bed all mornin' just to pass the time.

And a very good morning to you too. Porridge has been taken (3 toppings) coffee too and so all seems fine (apart from Doris banging and rattling outside). Hatches battened, even if we Londoners won’t be feeling the full force of her ire. What a splendid but rarely used word that is. From middle English and Latin obviously.

Last day for the 500 word-writers and there always the last-minute folk who always hand in their work as late as possible. Some of us are still like that. Maybe the habits set in early but with this comp there are no second chances, no special pleading because your cat was sick on your maths book, your aunt just arrived from New Zealand or you were sick in bed with a strange tropical illness caught whilst exploring the Nile. None of this will count. So we offer LEAVING IT LATE songs to encourage the faint-hearted.

And Nige will perform his flipping marvellous crepe cake ahead of Shrove Tuesday next week. He may well have pre-flipped however, to avoid all that health and safety.