Men Like Us: Ewan Gillon

Ewan Gillon, Chartered Psychologist and BACP accredited counsellor and psychotherapist writes about the Scottish man:

Ewan was a contributor on the BBC Radio Scotland programme The Story of Scottish Men, part of the Men Like Us Season.

Scotland's men have a reputation for being tough guys; think Alex Ferguson, Sean Connery, Frankie Boyle or even Gordon Brown. Despite the onset of the 'metrosexual' man (what, you might ask!?), traditional male ideals emphasising competitiveness, aggression, hard living and emotional detachment still hold firm in many parts of Scottish society.

Ewan Gillon

These ideals often have a darker edge, promoting aggression and violence as a means demonstrating status, or enacting control, and are shown in statistics indicating that Scotland has one of the highest rates of male on male homicide in Western Europe as well as appallingly high levels of intimate partner violence (domestic abuse) almost 85% of which is perpetrated by men on women. Yet as well as the horrific statistics relating to male violence, Scotland also has the highest rate of young male suicide in Europe, worryingly high levels of male alcohol-related illness (nearly three-quarters of alcohol-related deaths are men), and a range of problems with male addictions (including workaholism!), risky behaviours and anti-social activities. Generally, it would seem, the Scottish 'man' is in crisis. Although there are many reasons for this, social and economic deprivation included, it is ultimately the beliefs and ideals we have about what it means to be 'male' that structure the choices we make about what to do in any given set of circumstances and hence are at the heart of the problems we face.

In psychology, these beliefs and ideas are seen as part of a 'male gender role' that traps men in a conflict between failing to be 'enough' of a man or behaving in traditional 'male' ways that are ultimately self-defeating, and potentially harmful. Although there are forms of masculinity that enable men to express emotional vulnerability, work collaboratively and supportively with others, we seem stuck in Scotland with a version of 'men' that is just no longer viable. It is clearly time to change, but to whom and with what is the question we need to address.