By Justin Langer Test batsman on his way home to Australia

If there is one positive from the decision to postpone the Test series in Zimbabwe it is that as least we now know what is going on.

Now, as I sit on a plane back to Australia, reality has set in

On Friday morning we were sitting in our hotel rooms, waiting and preparing for the first Test, which was due to take place at the picturesque Harare cricket ground.

My thoughts were unclear as we had been told a decision wouldn't be made until 3:30 that afternoon, just 18 hours before the Test was due to start.

There had been so much speculation and confusion over the state of affairs in Zimbabwe that the story seemed to change every hour.

After countless meetings I was still no clearer on Friday morning than I had been yesterday, the day before, or even a week ago.

The murkiness was extremely disappointing, especially after the controversy over the rights and wrongs of the team touring Zimbabwe in the first place.

Regardless of those arguments and opinions, we had prepared like we would for any Test series.

Our practice match against Zimbabwe A provided good preparation. After five weeks away from cricket it was nice being back in the middle playing the game we love.

Up until Thursday afternoon we were setting ourselves to play hard against a very inexperienced Zimbabwean Test team.

Now, as I sit on a plane back to Australia, reality has set in.

The postponement of these two Tests is sure to leave a bitter taste in many cricket-loving mouths around the globe.

It was difficult and disapponting to leave my team-mates behind

Instead of playing a Test match, I am heading home with three of my team-mates, while the remainder of the squad have to stay and play three one-dayers.

The whole situation over the last few weeks, even months, seems to be such a terrible shame for cricket in Zimbabwe.

Without knowing the intricacies of the future problems the Zimbabwe Cricket Union faces, I can only imagine there will be gloomy ramifications.

Whether you talk to Heath Streak and his so-called rebels, the Zimbabwean officials, the young future hopefuls, or even the man in the street, there is a very clear view that everyone is disappointed and disturbed by what is transpiring.

Two nights ago a couple of us had dinner at Geoff Marsh's house.

Along with Streak, who is staying with Geoff, it became evident how disappointed they were with the situation.

All parties seem to have their own grievances, and while they all agree they would like to see the show go on, it seems the harder they try to come to some resolution the further they are from finding one.

A little while ago, a young black security guard posted outside the rooms of our hotel asked me if I was looking forward to playing on Saturday.

When I told him the bad news he dropped his eyes to the floor, shook his head and expressed quietly how sad he was about the problems that are affecting his country.

My lasting memory will be the look of dismay on his face. It is only a game of cricket, but the game of cricket means a lot to many people.

Take that away and it is just becomes one more thing lost in this beautiful, mysterious and magical country.