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Thursday - 6.15am

Huey

My legs are blue!!!

I've just woken up and stumbled naked and bleary eyed to the toilet to an empty my bladder which has done its best to keep me from my sleep since I hit the sack a few hours before. It was that cold, and I was so tired, that I would have happily slept in a pool of my own urine than got out of bed last night. At one particularly cold and desperate moment a 30 second injection of warmth into the bed seemed like a fair trade off for a wet and stinky night. Thankfully for maid I opted to go the distance.

As I headed out of the bathroom I was unfortunate enough to catch my naked reflection in the bathroom mirror only to notice my tan lines looked a little unusual. When I say unusual what I really mean is blue. From the waist up I had a faded brown tinge, but from the waist down I was blue. The only reason I didn't phone the emergency doctor was that I didn't have a plausible reason for my legs turning blue overnight other than I was too lazy to get out of bed and go for a wee. In a moment of panic that seemed to last a lifetime I thought about how my kidneys had got their revenge and how stupid I'd look in shorts.

Calm returned to room 213 when I went to get dressed and noticed my socks, shoes and underwear from yesterday had also turned blue thanks to the colour coming off my new jeans. A huge sigh of relief was followed my mild embarrassment, plus a brief moment of regret that my near-death-blue-legs-illness didn't rescue me from this tour a few days early. Then again, no one needs to know about my jeans now do they...

Thursday - 2.10pm

Kate

Calm before the storm?

Just taking a break to write this whilst waiting for Huey to get back with some choice photos for the website. It seems much calmer in this school than it did yesterday but that might be because we have hijacked the poor bursar's office so I'm in a nice quiet corner of the school with my laptop and central heating.

Fall Out Boy have just turned up with between 20 - 100 people in their entourage, depending on who you ask. One of them is definitely wearing flip flops however, which looks slightly wrong given you can still see snow on the ground here. Rock, and indeed roll.

Thursday - 17.45pm

Will

Oh Joy!!!

This morning's 'hit' - as in when we surprise our unsuspecting Star Pupil - was a bit fraught. There were a few issues with the Fred Flinstone sat-nav on the tour coach, I swear something small and prehistoric has to peddle inside to make it go. In desperation we broke out something I believe is known as a map. That didn't work so we did what all we always do when we're in the crap...we phoned the engineers. Via the medium of pens, paper and violent hand jestures we arrived at the victims house with 2 minutes to spare. This is not a strong look when you're supposed to be linking live into the country's biggest breakfast show. Just a few seconds late and we could have thrown Moyles' carefully timed and scripted show out of kilter for a fortnight. Luckliy Edith is a bit of a pro in such matters, so unfazed and glowing in the winter show, we duly surprised Robbie (who's a girl, for the record.)

By-the-by we're heading back to the hotel for breakfast (which in a bid to link the worlds of Croydon and Glasgow was serving haggis for breakfast, I wonder if they knew Edith was coming?) when we passed a well known supermarket and thought it best to stop and stock up on necessary bus foder like hob-knobs and crisps. Roachy our camerman also needed contact lens solution as he'd been running his under the tap for 2 days and had eyes like pebble-dash. This was when my favourite moment of the day happened.

The woman on the supermarket counter was sour-faced to say the least and I didn't cheer her day by typing my pin number wrong and causing the till to crash. It seemed her wonderful day at work in the supermarkert was hampered only by customers wishing to purchase perishable goods. As I withered under her steely gaze my mood imorved considerably when I spotted her name badge - which simply read, 'Joy'.

As I leave you the talk is once again in the gutter of scatology, we can't poo in the bus toilet and this seems to be bringing out the worst in people. When I work out a way of describing these talks without losing my job I'll be back in touch.

Thursday - 19.50pm

Huey

I'm starting to crack.

On a motorway in the middle of somewhere and I thought I saw an estate car overtake us on the hard shoulder with a book cabinet strapped to the roof, driven by a woman with a huge parrot on her shoulder. Tour madness has finally taken hold and who knows what lies ahead for the rest of the tour. I've been here before so I know the signs. When I nearly attacked Edith for her chocolate Cornflake cakes I realised that I'm only one Mars Bar away from doing what is now know as a Leo/Vannessa/Barrymore. I think I'll join the girls at the back of the bus and watch Xanadu - that'll sort my head out.

Thursday - 20.18pm

Roachy

"I'd love to see you in action".

I just heard the end of a conversation between Will and Huey... “I wish you were single Huey, I'd love to see you in action”. We've been away 4 days and the boys on the bus are going feral. Today was proper “We're a rock band and we're gonna blow the fillings outta your teeth” territory and they did just that. I even saw the beginnings of a mosh pit. What an inspiring school as well... Car mechanics classes, rock music lessons and a hairdressing salon where the kids are taught about, errr, hairdressing.

I had a really dodgy mate years ago who knew how to cut hair and whenever he needed to disappear for a bit he could go to any country in the world and whether he knew the language or not he could find work cutting hair. Probably not the best example to look up to - but you get the idea. I've been amazed at all the Star Pupil winners and their mates this week - none of them have frozen or been too shy to say anything. They've all been really polite kids, willing to get stuck in and do whatever we ask them. If you believed the papers you'd despair but all the ones I've been around this week have been a credit to their school.