David Oyelowo, Andy Serkis, Helen George, Sophie Ellis-Bextor

From comedian & writer Paul Kerensa:

Apparently this is THE weekend most of us are buying Christmas trees. In our house that means our traditional disagreement: real versus fake. Personally I like the genuine, authentic, plastic tree in the loft… My wife prefers a trek in the rain to unearth a real one.

The best fact about fake trees? The Addis brush company kickstarted fake trees in the 1930s, after making too many toilet brushes. So if some Christmas trees look like they have loo brushes for branches, it’s because they have loo brushes for branches.

The best fact about real trees? They take up to ten years to grow. So right now, your 2028 tree is hard at work. Makes me think, I’m not planning that far ahead. My Christmas tree for a decade’s time is already a sapling. I can’t think past New Year.

But I guess we start small. In my favourite festive cartoon, Charlie Brown’s Christmas, Charlie chooses a scrawny shrub: the only real tree he can find amid garish fakes. Better to have small growth that’s real, over a brash phoney that never takes root – and is probably best used as a toilet brush. Then, overcome by commercialism, Charlie asks who knows the true meaning of Christmas. Enter Charlie’s blanket-clutching friend Linus, who quotes from Luke’s gospel – all angels and glory and shepherds being sore afraid. When Linus speaks the angel’s words: “Fear not!” …he allows himself to drop his comfort blanket.

I hope, in ten years’ time, when today’s newly-planted Christmas tree seedling is fully grown and in our living-room, I’ll be able to look back at how I’ve grown, from seeds planted now. I hope the decade will have been one of steady kindness, like the loyal nuns of Call the Midwife – living like the song goes, “Love is You, you’re its smile”. The journey may have featured Les Miserables-style redemption, that can’t be rushed. We may have started afresh like Mowgli, when new growth can seem a frightening jungle. But like Linus said, ‘fear not’. On earth, be peace, and in earth, let’s plant for tomorrow, and do some digging.