Balls Up

Jack and Victor head to the Clansman only to find it's Isa behind the bar. Turns out Boabby has taken up walking football on a Monday night, and he's getting match-fit for a very important tournament at the weekend. But his football career is about to be cut short, and with Boabby out of the game, it's up to Jack and Victor to pull a team together and set their sights on winning that much-needed new pitch for their local community.

As a warm-up, they play a friendly against the doddery old Claymore pub team, but this doesn't quite go to plan so, under the guidance of a firm new manager, the Craiglang team sets about a rigorous Rocky-inspired training regime and decide to employ some interesting new tactics.

Meanwhile, Methadone Mick puts himself forward for a key role at the tournament (there's 60 quid on offer, after all) and with no other candidates to choose from, the straight-laced Ms Greer has no option but to take a punt on him. What could possibly go wrong?

With training complete and the oranges all quartered, will the newly formed Craiglang team make an impact at the all-important tournament, or will it turn out to be a massive own goal?