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Arts Show host reignites her passion for the cello

23 September 2015

BBC presenter Marie-Louise Muir, known for hosting the Arts Show in Northern Ireland, recently challenged herself to re-visit the 'constant companion' she had as a child, her cello. She describes the journey she took to re-learn the instrument 25 years after she last played.

Marie-Louise after her first public performance

I’m climbing a ladder to the roof space of my house. Up there, among the half used paint pots, baby toys and Christmas decorations, lies my cello. Dusty, neglected, only one string attached, and even that string is barely hanging on. It’s been 25 years since I have played cello in any proper way. But in just six weeks’ time, I will be playing it on stage with my former youth orchestra, in front of an audience! I am terrified. But for the moment, all my fear is concentrated on my fear of heights, climbing the ladder and praying my 10-year-old daughter below doesn’t let go of it!

It’s been 25 years since I have played cello in any proper way. But in just six weeks’ time, I will be playing it on stage with my former youth orchestra, in front of an audience!

I was seven years of age when I arrived home from school with a cello. I had been selected by my primary four teacher to take a test from the local music service. This was Northern Ireland in the mid 1970s and free music provision for children was considered a positive alternative to the Troubles. I clapped along to a few rhythms played on the piano, sang a few scales and was deemed suitable for a musical instrument. The first few girls in the line got violins while the girls (me included) in the second half of the line got cellos. It was my constant companion from that day until I went to university 11 years later. I took it with me, but it started to stay longer and longer in its case.

Then one day I just stopped. There was no definite decision. It just happened. But I would continue to say to people that I played the cello but the truth was I didn’t. My finger tips had softened, my posture was poor and the girl who had joined orchestras, played solo on stage, done her Grade Eight and practiced until she thought her arm would drop off was a memory.

My youngest daughter is now seven, and maybe it was her being the same age as I was when I started, that I saw the cello playing more and more on my mind. I realised that my children had never heard me play a note. They didn’t know the cello playing me. So the idea of taking it up again was as much for them as it was for the making of the radio documentary.

Marie-Louise with her teacher David, the first time she sat behind a cello again.
I started to wear each new callous, each new ache, with pride

It was a tough re-start. My cello teacher David was patient, kind but also laughed a lot at my obvious discomfort. Muscles that had lain dormant for years ached, especially in my buttocks for some reason! My finger tips felt bruised. I posted on Facebook mainly to keep me motivated. On March 29 I posted: “my fingers are sore, my wrists are as weak as kittens. I could barely hold a knife and fork at dinner”. I got great feedback, encouragement, advice. I felt supported. And I started to wear each new callous, each new ache, with pride. I dug out my old scale books and went back to the beginning. One book had September 1977 written by my then teacher at the top of the page. I thought if I could do it then I am going to do it now.

My children would wander in while I was practising, and I showed them how to sit at the instrument, hold the bow, pull it across the strings. I went on a short break to Edinburgh and asked on Facebook if anyone could lend me a cello for the weekend. A young girl in her first year at uni lent me hers. Like me she wasn’t studying music but had got to Grade Eight. I found myself texting her and saying, as if to my younger self, “don’t give up on this instrument - even 10 minutes a day. Keep going.” I even found myself on Easter Monday restringing a cello for the first time in decades. Thank god for Youtube is all I can say.

Marie- Lousie with orchestra tutor Marion Haddow and Mary Scully, double bass player (right)
It was my comfort blanket, my friend, my life. I am grateful to have had the chance to wrap it around me again

My cello started to sing. I was actually playing. I felt good. I pored over the orchestral parts for the imminent concert. Then found an orchestra playing the same piece on YouTube, an arrangement of John Williams’ film classics. I pressed play and started to play along. They had reached the end of page one while I was still on bar three. I stopped and panicked. The concert was in three weeks’ time. I was not match fit.

I think I had to hit the wall to get beyond. The next step over it was to join the youth orchestra at a rehearsal. It took me about 50 minutes to settle back into orchestral playing but what a feeling. There is nothing like communal playing. I was buzzing after.

The concert itself was a bit of a blur. I was nearly hyperventilating with nerves before it started while all the kids stood around me chatting, laughing and on their phones. I remember walking on the stage, sitting down and picking up my bow. I know I didn’t come in at the wrong place or play any bum notes and when I heard the applause I felt a rush of endorphins that not even running twenty marathons would have given me. I also cried. Tears of great joy. My mother put her finger on it after. She said she always saw me wrapped around my cello, and it around me. It was my comfort blanket, my friend, my life. I am grateful to have had the chance to wrap it around me again.

And it doesn’t end there. I am now organising a reunion of my former youth orchestra members, people like me who gave up, but want to come back. We play in a venue as yet to be confirmed in Londonderry, Northern Ireland on the 27 December. There will be a party after. I think that’s why most of them are doing it. I said there would be free beer!

Emer Kennedy, cello, Jane Fulton, cello, behind Emer; & Aidan Kelly, viola.
Marie-Louise meeting some former first generation Youth Orchestra members

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