Eurovision 2017: Here’s What We Learned In The First Semi Final

We’ve waited twelve long months, and when Eurovision made its glorious return in Kyiv, Ukraine on Tuesday evening it certainly didn’t disappoint.

Among the traditional blend of belt-it-out ballads and show-stopping pop tunes, we were treated to the best ponytail in Eurovision history (seriously - it was great), the sensational reappearance of Epic Sax Guy and, for some reason, Azerbaijan’s entry featured a man stood on a ladder wearing a horse’s head.

So basically, it was another typically brilliant night of Eurovision action.

Here are all the talking points from Semi Final number 1:

First Things First: Who Went Through?

Whilst the theme of Eurovision 2017 is of course celebrate diversity, there is a subtle, underlying theme running through this year’s proceedings, which is ‘win the Eurovision Song Contest’.

So before we go any further, here’s who Europe voted into Saturday’s final:

Unfortunately we had to say goodbye to acts from Albania, Czech Republic, Finland, Georgia, Iceland, Montenegro, Slovenia and Latvia.

But fear not! You can still watch their performances in full on the BBC Eurovision website.

It was an evening filled with drama

We’ve all become used to the nervous tension of the Eurovision final, as the continent dials in to reveal their douze points; but if you’re looking for real drama then the semi finals are where it’s at.

There’s no 'ten points' here or ‘you look lovely tonight’ there - it’s a straight in or out. As the slots in the final are filled, so the pressure mounts.

Last night it was the turn of fan favourite (and number 4 with the bookies) seventeen-year-old Blanche of Belgium to be the last one through.

We could hear the huge sigh of relief in Brussels from here, and although her performance might have looked a little bit nervous Blanche is still a very strong contender for Saturday’s final.

Slavko Was Robbed

Where there were winners, unfortunately there must also be losers.

And in this case the losers weren’t just the acts themselves, but all of Europe: When we sit down to watch the final on Saturday night, we won’t be able to enjoy one of the great ponytail-based Eurovision acts of all time.

Slavko is going home.

In the space of two minutes and fifty seconds, the Montenegrin entry captured hearts and minds across the world (although apparently not enough, because he was still eliminated) with his sensational barnet, as he spread himself on the floor atop a projection of his own face.

Though we may not get to see him perform on Saturday, the spirit of Slavko will live on forever.

Eurovision 2017 Is Just As Bonkers As Ever Before

If you’re worrying that Eurovision 2017 might not be *quite* as daft as in previous years - don’t.

Last night, for example, Dihaj of Azerbaijan performed with a man stood on top of a ladder wearing a horse’s head. Although if you’re a seasoned Eurovision fan you’ll obviously find that completely normal.

Sweden’s entry, Robin Bengtsson, spent last night dancing on a treadmill, whilst Isaiah Firebrace of Australia sang from on top of a massive lazy susan - one of those spinny things posh people have on their dinner tables to help get the butter from one side to the other.

Meanwhile Greece seem to have employed one of those footbaths you have to walk through before you get into the swimming pool and Italy, perhaps channeling the spirit of Ireland’s Dustin The Turkey, have invited a large ape to participate in their performance.

Oh, and did we mention…

The Spectacular Return of Epic Sax Guy

What Moldova’s entry lacks in lyrics (it’s principally comprised of the words ‘hey’ and ‘mama’), it more than makes up for it by bringing back the hero of Eurovision 2010: Epic Sax Guy!

The man who became an internet sensation in 2010, inspiring this ten hour long tribute video, was once again a star of the show.

And the good news is that he’s safely through to the final, meaning we’ll all get to bask in the brilliance of his horn blowing again on Saturday night.

Lucie Has Got A Great Chance

The UK’s Eurovision superstar didn’t perform last night, because we qualify for the final automatically, but we did treat the rest of Europe to a sneak peak at Lucie Jones’s entry.

And you know what? She looked very strong.

Lucie might not be the favourite to win this year, but she’s certainly up amongst the best of the entries we’ve seen so far.

If Lucie is going to win, however, she’s going to have to see off the likes of Portugal’s Salvador, and you have to say that he did look very, very good last night.

Just Another Incredible Eurovision Semi Then?

Yup. Everything we love about the Eurovision Song Contest and more was on display in Kyiv last night.

Don’t forget to join us on BBC 4 on Thursday night, when Mel Giedroyc and Scott Mills will bring us coverage of the second semi final live from Ukraine.

And if you missed any of the action, or can’t wait for your next Eurovision fix on Thursday night, you can watch the whole of Semi Final 1 again on the BBC Eurovision website.