Dad
We're here for the check up.
Mum
Oh right.
Dad
Getting another little tick in the book. What about you?
Mum
Oh the first jabs.
Dad
Oh, eight weeks?
Mum
Yes.
Dad
Yes, yeah. Have you done your prep?
Mum
Prep?
Dad
You know, for the next couple of days.
Mum
Oh, yeah we've bought some paracetamol. So it's okay.
Dad
Oh you're going to medicate?
Mum
Well yeah that's what they say for you to do, isn't it, the doctors.
Dad
They do say that. Yes, they do. We went the natural route. You know, lots of rest… My partner just drinking camomile tea.
Mum
It's okay, we wont be long now honey, it's okay.
Dad
Oh, you're doing the talking thing?
Mum
To the baby? Yes. Well yes.
Dad
They say it's good isn't it to talk to the baby. Yeah they do it's brilliant. Having that contact with them and making sure they're… Shh now, shh… There we are. Shush shush… Very good. Well done you.
Mum
Is that your little foot?
Dad
You can feed if you want to. If she's being a bit grizzly. Not a problem for me.
Mum
No she's okay. She doesn't need anything. She's on a bottle anyway, so…
Dad
Oh, you're expressing?
Mum
Oh, no, formula.
Dad
Very young…
Mum
Well I had a few problems and had to make the decision to go to formula.
Dad
Cabbage leaves.
Mum
Cabbage leaves?
Dad
Cabbage leaves. No trust me get some organic cabbages and cut out a couple of little…well, get the big outer leaves… and then you can just rest them on. Very cooling. Very soothing.
Doctor
Mr Smith? Oop, that's us. Right, okay, tara. Oh hello doctor.
Mum
You all right? The weird little man has gone away, gone away, gone away. The weird little man has gone away. Ha, ha, ha…
Every parent has that nightmare encounter with the 'know-it-all', who seems to consider themselves an expert. Perhaps even more of an expert than the healthcare professionals you've been listening to!
