Children In Need

Saturday 11 October

Today I decided that I needed some new shoes. “So, what’s new?” I heard my husband cry. Yes – actually CRY – with despair – especially when I explained that these wouldn’t just be any old shoes – Oh No! These would need the special kind of “give” that only dance shoes from a proper dance shoe shop can give – or so the dance shoe industry tells us anyway, which gives them licence to charge twice the price of a normal pair of black shoes with a thin strap and a small heel.

Realising that I would need a bit of a heel on my shoes for Dancers in Need, as clomping around in trainers coupled with an elegant flowing dress is not a good look, I came to the decision that I needed to have something more suitable than my usual footwear of choice.

Laura concentrates hard

I didn’t want anything flashy you understand, just some character shoes with a small heel, the sort of shoes that you wear on the stage when you are playing a non-descript villager or nursery rhyme character in the opening scene of a panto where you sing a topical chart hit that bears no relation to the story. They are one step up from the flats that I prefer to wear, but not quite at the level where I am likely to do myself some serious injury.

Now, I did have some character shoes once, I probably still have, but can I find them – can I heck?! Having searched everywhere, and I mean everywhere, even the darkest recesses under the bed, I have given up. I now think that I may have chucked them in one of my recent purges, thinking that I was never likely to be Little Bo Peep ever again!

But just as I was heading for the invitingly named “Let’s Dance” in St Albans, I stopped in my tracks as a horrific thought entered my head. What if the shoes that I was all set to fork out for DIDN’T MATCH MY DRESS. It didn’t bear thinking about. I had to do some quick thinking, and eventually decided that in order to avoid certain fashion disaster, I should buy some cheap practice shoes of about the right height, and then splash out on some more suitable ones when I know the colour of my outfit.

So that was how I ended up with some black Mary Jane type shoes from New Look that look a bit like my lost character shoes, but will probably rip my feet to bits within about five seconds.

But at least I’ll be able to wear them for things other than dancing, and if nothing else, one of this year’s pantos may yet need a more mature nursery character – maybe the Fuller Figured Bo Peep - who can do the Cha Cha Cha!

Sunday 12 October

My feet hurt! And so do my legs, shoulders and lower back. Ooh Ooh my hips don’t lie and what they have been saying is that I have definitely been doing some exercise. It’s been a long old afternoon of recapping all that we did last week, plus adding in those most complex of moves – a couple of turns! You really wouldn’t think that the Waltz, which is essentially walking around to music, could be so tiring.

Howard learns the Cha Cha Cha

And yes, I was right, I have a blister. The shoes were fine until the jive, or to use a more accurate description “jumping up and down on the spot a lot!” But now, with the evidence of the tell tale little bubble on my foot, I have been able to exaggerate the various other aches and pains somewhat, which means that I have been able to have my feet up all evening, and complain that I can do very little for myself. “No change there then” I hear my husband say!

But despite “feeling it a little”, it had been a good afternoon. Even though Lorna Hankin has some lovely “proper” dance shoes which I am coveting. I really do need to sort out my outfit, although why what I am going to wear for this event has become more important than anything else, I am at quite a loss to understand. It’s just like getting married all over again. Well – not quite like that of course. This competition doesn't involve quite the same commitment – yet!

The only thing that is worrying me now is the fact that we still haven’t got our partners. Without them, it’s all a bit reminiscent of the youth club disco where you wait your turn to dance with an actual boy, and where it looks a bit sad shuffling along doing the steps on your own and trying to look nonchalant as if you really don’t care. I honestly think that we would all be fine if this was line dancing. The problems seem to arise when you get to a corner and to do that properly, you need a nice chap to steer you round it. Roll on next week when I should have my very own Anton du Beke or Brendan Cole to help!

Monday 13 October

The competition is hotting up. And it’s not just for the dancing! Much of the talk this morning in the office was about who ached the most! Now this was a battle I thought I could possibly win, but it seemed that everybody was feeling some sort of effect from yesterday.

Lorna Milton complained that it had been a long afternoon as she didn’t get home until 8.00pm. But when I pointed out to everyone that the rehearsal actually finished at 4.30, she had to admit that her “rehearsal” had continued down the pub. Dancing on the tables probably!

Caught on camera - Helen and Lorna H!

But what’s clear is that it seems that despite everyone saying that it’s all in a good cause and that it’s not about the winning, there has been a lot of practice going on and most of it much more seriously than my odd swizz around the living room!

My spy at Morning MK sent me pictures from the Webcam at the Milton Keynes studio which show last year’s participant Helen Legh coaching one of this year’s dancers, her producer Lorna Hankin. Remember – Big Brother is ALWAYS watching! Nothing gets past me!

And Stephen Rhodes tried to make Lorna Milton and I feel guilty by casually offering us a CD of dance music to practice to! He has already started private lessons in a bid to win. All we have to say to that is “Well, if you feel you need the extra help Stephen …. Go for it!”

Oooh yes – the battle starts here! But only "for the kiddies" of course!