KS1 / KS2 English: The Falcon's Malteser by Anthony Horowitz

Diamond Brothers, what do we know about them? They're two private detectives, in this brilliant book… The Falcon's Malteser.

Right. Tim, is the older brother. Pretty much the worst detective ever. Lucky for him, he's got his kid brother for a partner.

BOTH: Nick. Now, Nick is great, because he's smart… he's brave, and… he really knows when trouble walks through the door. Which is does, in the shape of this. The package, they were asked to look after. It sounds like a box of chocolates?

It is a box of chocolates, and it also plunges Nick and Tim into a whole world of danger. It turns out that those chocolates are worth £3,500,000. Soon, the brothers are being pursued by some of the scariest villains in the world, who all want to get hold of that package. Villains like The Fatman, the world's thinnest master-criminal. He gives them a deadline to hand it over, and the key-word here, is… dead. I can wait all of 48 hours, but if I haven't heard from you in two days I think you may wake up to find something very unpleasant has happened to you. Like you no longer have any feet.

Nice guy (!)

I love the fact he meets them in Trafalgar Square, in London, so he can feed the pigeons.

Yeah, with poisoned corn.

Of course Nick only realises that once The Fatman has driven off in his Rolls.

Listen. A few feet away a pigeon suddenly gurgled, and keeled over on its side. A moment later, two more joined it, their feet sticking up in the air. By the time the Rolls-Royce had reached the corner of Trafalgar Square, and turned off towards Hyde Park, we were surrounded by corpses.

'Do you think he's trying to tell us something?', I said. I'd say it's pretty clear. Today it's pigeons, next time it's them.

There's so many great characters in the book. With the main characters, Nick and Tim, and then you've got The Fatman, the rich widow, the professor… There's also the two henchman, Himmel and Gott-- Yeah. who I think are really well described by the writer, Anthony Horowitz, because at one point they're making tea, playing a piano, and then the next minute, they're tying Nick up in a chair. We're all so used to adult detectives being really clever… Or pretending they are. and this time we've got Nick. He's 13, and he's just way ahead of anyone else. Soon, the owner of the chocolates, is dead. Tim's blamed and thrown in jail. And Nick's left with a mystery to solve. All while being threatened by the police, by some heavies, oh yeah, and don't forget, by a rich widow's alligator. The last time I saw an alligator, it was hanging on some rich woman's arm with lipsticks and purses inside. But this one was no handbag. It was very alive, waddling out of the pool. It's ugly, black eyes, fixed on the plate of meat.

'Don't worry.' The widow said. 'He's very fond of strangers.

'Yeah?' 'Cooked or raw?', I asked.

I mean when someone tells you they've got a pet called Fido, you're not expecting that kind of pet, are you? I pointed at the alligator, it was getting too close for comfort. As far as I was concerned, a hundred miles would have been too close for comfort.

'Do you have a license for that thing?', I asked.

'I don't know.' She said. 'It was a present from my late husband.

'Have you ever thought about pussy cats?' '

'Fido ate the pussy cats.'

I thought of turning and running, but I couldn't be sure I would make it to the door. The alligator had short, wrinkled legs, but at that moment, I can't say mine felt much better. One thing I love doing when I'm reading, is stopping halfway through a book, and then trying to guess where all the different stories are going to end up. You're trying to figure out the same clues as Nick, at the same time. I think this is a great book to do that with. Maybe next time you're reading, put the book down before you get to the end, play detective a little, and see if you can work out what might happen next.

Poor Nick. He's attacked, knocked out, tied down, and almost blown up. Imagine how that must feel?

So who is the Falcon? Why is this package worth so much money? Is Nick gonna stay alive long enough to figure it all out? Read the book.

I have! I'm talking to these guys.

Oh, yeah. So read the book to find out all the answers. Then keep the secret to yourself. You never know who might be listening.