 Danaher (centre) and the Exiles have felt the pressure this season |
London Irish flanker Declan Danaher has revealed the pressure of the Premiership relegation struggle is giving him sleepless nights.
And the England hopeful admits he may be forced to think about leaving the Exiles if they drop out of the top flight.
Bristol's bonus point in their defeat to Saracens on Tuesday left Irish a point adrift of the rest in the Zurich basement battle.
And Danaher admits that with just two games left to save themselves - at Leicester on Saturday and against Bristol a week later - the nerve ends are jangling.
"It is not a nice place to be at the bottom and it definitely plays on your mind," he told this website. "Even when you are second bottom you don't think about it as much.
"All the anxiety is setting in and I am not sleeping well at the moment.
"You find yourself dreaming about different scenarios. It is a very difficult period and not nice compared to last year."
The contrast with 12 months ago could not be more stark.
Then, the Exiles had won the Powergen Cup with a stunning triumph over Northampton and were on course for the Heineken Cup with a top-four finish in the league.
I would have to think about it long and hard if we went down  |
Danaher had featured in England's Six Nations training squad and was in contention for the summer tour to Argentina, on which team-mates Geoff Appleford and Michael Horak both made their debuts.
But after failing to advance his international prospects this season in a struggling side, Danaher admits relegation could force him to head for pastures new.
"I am committed to the club and I don't want to go anywhere," he insists.
"I love London Irish and if I had to leave it would be a big upheaval.
"It is something you don't want to think about because it becomes a negative thing - it is like admitting defeat.
Positive atmosphere
"But I would have to think about it long and hard if we went down.
"It is my career, I am only 23 and I want to play top-flight rugby. Clive Woodward is not going to look at you if you are playing in Division One."
From half a dozen international contenders last year, only Exiles prop Mike Worsley has featured in England's senior squad this season, with Justin Bishop belatedly on Ireland duty.
Danaher believes though that even without injured player-coach Brendan Venter - sidelined with knee ligament trouble - the Irish have the personnel to escape the drop.
"We are really looking forward to it," he said. "It is a really positive atmosphere and it is still in our own hands.
"If we win on Saturday and next week then we will have sorted ourselves out. It is really up to the players - it is our responsibility."