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By David Sharp
1703: Phew, what a day! Exciting stuff! That's it, I'm away to lie down in a darkened room and listen to Philip Glass' famous silence 'song' on a continuous loop with a cold compress on my forehead.
Thanks again for all your company. Bye for now.
1702: Who was your star man today? Cast your vote here:
1700: "If there was an Olympic medal awarded for synchronised moaning, Killie's Jefferies and Brown would be gold medallists." Des McKeown, BBC Radio Scotland pundit
Look out Frank Carson, Des is angling to replace you as compere of the Best Of British Variety Tour 2008.
1658: "Some things just never change in football! The away team denied a penalty, then the home team getting one in the closing stages to ensure victory at Ibrox!brightzaraerin on 606 Join the debate on 606
Another week, another controversial penalty decision...
1654: FULL-TIME: St Mirren 0-0 Kilmarnock A sludgefest of goalless drudgery at Love Street.
1654: FULL-TIME: Inverness CT 0-1 Hamilton Another brilliant three points for Hamilton which sees them sitting pretty at top of the tree.
1654: FULL-TIME: Hibs 3-2 Falkirk Mixu Paatelainen's men stave off a stirring Falkirk comeback to secure all three points at Easter Road.
1653: FULL-TIME Rangers 2-0 Hearts A deserved win in the end for the Ibrox men, but Hearts were always in the match as Rangers couldn't find that second killer goal...until Boyd's late penalty.
1651: GOAL: Rangers 2-0 Hearts Gers striker Kris Boyd steps up and sweeps the ball past McDonald to seal victory for the home side.
1650: Penalty for Rangers. Kenny Miller embarks on a mazy run through the heart of the Hearts' defence and Lee Wallace trips the striker as he shapes to shoot on the edge of the six-yard box.
1650: FULL-TIME Motherwell 0-1 Aberdeen The Dons sneak past Well with a sucker-punch, hit-and-run goal.
1648: Dons substitute Tommy Wright apparently headbutted Stephen Craigan a few minutes ago but the incident was missed by the match officials.
1647: Hearts are denied a penalty after Driver's half-volley strikes Bougherra's left elbow. Hmmm, that was a possible dodgy one.
1644: GOAL: Motherwell 0-1 Aberdeen The Dons have pulled off the old classic 'dope-a-rope' tactic on Well. After being on the ropes for the entire match, Charlie Mulgrew fires them into the lead. Cruel blow for Well, who have been, erm, well on top...
1642: "Sammon's up in the air, but he's missed it - the one that got away again!" Des McKeown, BBC Radio Scotland pundit
Des is auditioning live on-air for a warm-up spot on The Krankies 40-year reunion tour.
1639: "This is uncharacteristic of Walter Smith. Very rarely does he throw on two attacking players when we're in the lead. I wonder if this is the start of something new at Ibrox? Super_Ally_Super_Ally! on 606 Join the debate on 606
And Jean-Claude Darcheville is poised to come on too! After last season's safety-first tactics, Walter has been infected with gung-ho fever.
1637: "Aberdeen have been very negative." - Murdo Macleod, BBC Radio Scotland pundit
Still no goals at Fir Park.
1634: That's the third time Mikoliunas has been given his marching orders against Rangers. Seems he gets a tad too excitable against the Glasgow side.
1633: Hearts midfielder Saulius Mikoliunas has been sent off. The unfortunate Lithuanian has only been on the pitch for five minutes. Mikoliunas was booked a few minutes ago for, ironically, enough, diving. And he went flying into Kenny Miller with his studs akimbo. Hearts are down to ten men!
1630: "If Killie can snatch a victory in Paisley today, that could set up a top of the table clash with Hamilton next Saturday. Feel free to end the league competition now." KillieJimbo on 606 Join the debate on 606
Wouldn't that be a turn up for the books! Although, to be fair, it would only be after two games! Sorry, don't mean to puncture your giddy balloon!
1627: Fletcher strikes a long-range effort off the top of the Falkirk crossbar.
1626: Beasley is instantly in the thick of the action, rounding McDonald, but his cross flashes agonisingly across the Hearts goal.
1625: Mendes arrows a howitzer across McDonald's main-sails, which the Hearts keeper does well to see never mind flap away. Boyd attempts an ambitious volley on the rebound but the ball flies over the bar. Stunning strike from Mendes.
16.25: Steven Fletcher fires wide after a Colin Nish knock-down gives the striker a chance to make it 4-2 for Hibs.
1623: DaMarcus 'Run DMC' Beasley comes on for the injured Kyle Lafferty. The gangly Northern Irishman has tweaked his hamstring and hobbles off to appreciative applause from the Rangers faithful.
1621: It's all Motherwell at Fir Park, but they can't make the breakthrough. The Dons look lethargic. Less Dandy, more donkey.
16.20: Olejnik again makes a superb save from a great left-foot shot from Steven Fletcher to keep the Bairns hopes of a dramatic comeback alive.
1619: Kenny Miller is stripped and ready to throw himself into the fray at Ibrox. He replaces Lee McCulloch. Apart from taking a swipe at fresh air in the lead-up to Lafferty's goal, I don't recall McCulloch making a single meaningful contribution to the match...
1617: Laryea Kingston lines up a direct free-kick for Hearts. He bends the ball from 25-yards out but it strikes the Rangers wall and goes out for a corner.
1613: GOAL: Hibs 3-2 Falkirk Sloppy defending from Hibs allows Michael Higdon to grab his, and Falkirk's second goal of the game. The Bairns are back in it again!
1612: Jim Hamilton hits the bar for St Mirren. He leaps like Connor Sammon but his header crashes off Alan Combe's crossbar. Unlucky Saints.
1608: GOAL: Hibs 3-1 Falkirk Deep cross met by young Paul Hanlon to restore Hibs' two-goal lead.
1607: Phenomenal double-save from McGregor. Andrew Driver, erm, drives an, erm, piledriver from a narrow angle but the Rangers keeper gets his body behind the strike. It pinballs off his chest and Ksanavicius pounces on the loose ball but McGregor beats it away again.
1605: And we're away again. Hold on to your bunnets. Fling them high in the air when your team scores a goal. Isn't it funny that people used to do that on football terraces back in the day?!
1555: I'm off to stick my sizzling paws in a bowl of iced water. Be back in two shakes of a lamb's tail. Or, 10 minutes in human time.
1553: "First of all lol @ the time stamp and secondly he has quite an appropriate name doesn't he? Bolt." donkamero on 606 Join the debate on 606
Bolt! I love it. The big man's telescopic legs were going like the clappers. It was sensational!
1551: "I'm getting a bit worried about Motherwell's lack of depth in the squad. We really don't have enough cover for any area. I know McGhee wants quality but I fear he may be leaving us a little short for the first part of the season."madscot125 on 606 Join the debate on 606
1549: The whistles have blown across the country. It's time to grab a cup of tea and sook on some oranges . Let's pretend you're the one of the 10 SPL gaffers - what would your half-time team talks consist of? Join the debate on 606
1548: GOAL: Inverness CT 0-1 Hamilton Billy Reid's high-flying youngsters stun Caley Thistle on the stroke of half-time as Richard Offiong wakes from his dream-like reverie to drive the ball home from close range. Offiong was apparently one of the worst players on show in a woeful opening 45 minutes. But he's certainly made amends now.
1547: "It's always good to watch Jim Jefferies and Billy Brown having a go at the fourth official." BBC Radio Scotland pundit Des McKeown
The highlight of a dour first-half at Love Street appears to be the oh-so-familiar sight of Kille's very own Waldorf and Stadler going nuts at a sheepish match official.
1543: Hearts go in search of an equaliser. But Allan McGregor is alert to the danger and snatches the ball away from Jamie Mole's feet.
1542: "David: Falkirk are going to come back and win at Easter Road. You heard it here first!" Super_Ally_Super_Ally! on 606 Join the debate on 606
The Bairns have certainly hauled themselves back into contention after they were blown away by Hibs' whirlwind start.
1538: GOAL: Rangers 1-0 Hearts Madjid Bougherra's low cross from the right is missed by Lee McCulloch and Kyle Lafferty curls the ball beyond McDonald to break the deadlock eight minutes before the break.
1536: All the goals are happening at Easter Road. What's going on with the other four games? Everyone else seems to have left their shooting boots at home today.
15.35: John Rankin misses the target from close range following an Alan O'Brien cross as the midfielder misses a chance to immediately restore Hibs' two-goal lead.
John Stewart heads up the other end and forces Andrew McNeil into a save with a blistering drive and Kevin McBride just fails to connect with his head as Hibs are suddenly under the cosh.
15.33: GOAL: Hibs 2-1 Falkirk The Bairns are back in it. Michael Higdon nods home a cross from Gerard Aafjes in Falkirk's first real attack. Game on!
1530 and 9.68 seconds: Astonishing performance by Jamaica's Usain Bolt! He starts showboating with 10 metres to go and still smashes the world record!
1530: I'm distracted by the start of final of the Olympic men's 100m.
1527: GOAL: Hibs 2-0 Falkirk Fletcher just fails to make contact with a cross into the box but Nish makes no mistake with a bullet header.
1525: A few minutes ago, the ref at Ibrox, Stuart Dougal, brandished a yellow card at Kevin Thomson. Rangers had a direct free-kick and the Gers midfielder wanted to take it quickly. Words were spoken and Thomson was booked. What kind of fussy-pants nonsense is that?
1523: Poor headed clearance from Darren Barr - celebrating his call-up to the Scotland squad - and Steven Fletcher's drive forces Robert Olejnik into a fine save.
1522: BBC Radio Scotland's Allan Preston emits a piercing squeal as Steven Fletcher's wonder strike is somehow palmed away by Olejnik.
1520: "Rangers are certainly getting nearer the goal but Hearts goalkeeper Jamie MacDonald will be happy with his performance so far." >BBC Radio Scotland pundit Craig Paterson
1519: Hibs' Alan O'Brien bursts into the Falkirk box but Lee Bullen thwarts him with a brilliantly timed sliding tackle.
1517: Nish should have hit the target but fires wide and misses a golden opportunity to bag his second goal against Falkirk.
1516: This time Boyd sends Velicka clean through on goal with a terrific reverse pass but the Lithaunian's first touch is as delicate as a sledgehammer, allowing the Hearts defence to swarm round him, and the chance is gone.
1513: Kilmarnock have started brightly at Love Street.
1512: Andrius Velicka latches on to Mendes' high through ball and nods it over the top of the Hearts defence for Kris Boyd to run onto. Boyd only needs to lift it over Jamie McDonald's head for the opening goal. But McDonald leaps high and catches Boyd's rather lame attempt at a lob.
1508: "I'm stuck at work, still it's good to have the footy back. Staying positive (it worked last week) and going for Killie to win 2-1 although I think we will concede the first goal." one4colin-neverwull on 606 Join the debate on 606
1504: "In the absence of Barry Ferguson, Kevin Thomson needs to step up to the plate today." BBC Radio Scotland pundit Craig Paterson
The former Hibs man was caught in a ga ga trance there. He needs to wake up if he has any designs on bossing this game.
1502: GOAL: Hibs 1-0 Falkirk First goal of the afternoon at Easter Road. At last Hibs have broken their duck! Colin Nish sweeps the ball under Bairns keeper Olejnik after only 24 seconds of play.
1501: Kevin Thomson dilly-dallies on the ball and Laryea Kingston steals possession and bears down on goal. Rangers scramble the ball clear for a corner which comes to nowt.
1500: All the games are underway.
1459: Rangers have won their last 14 league games at Ibrox. Not a bad record. Can Hearts blow the wheels off that bandwagon today? The Jambos have won only one of their last 26 visits to Govan.
1458: Two minutes to kick off!
1454: "@1432 The Beckham's wedding? lol That was crazy! donkamero on 606 Join the debate on 606
Ha ha! Yer darn tooting donkamero - the crazy spendthrift pair blew half a million spondoolicks on the reception alone! A total of 437 staff were required for the whole day - that's even more than Rangers have on duty for Ibrox matchday hospitality.
1451: TEAM NEWS: Hibs v Falkirk
Hibernian right-back David Van Zanten recovered from a head knock to start. Midfielder John Rankin is also given the nod as the home side look to bounce back from their season-opening 1-0 defeat at Killie.
TheBairns lost by the same scoreline in their curtain-raiser against Rangers but manager John Hughes keeps faith with the same XI, meaning on-loan Crystal Palace goalkeeper Scott Flinders had to be content with a place on the bench.
1450: "We need Rangers to go out there today and show the fans that they mean business this season, a convincing win today." donkamero on 606 Join the debate on 606
As revealed below, Mendes makes his Rangers debut from the start. The playmaker is thrown straight into the lion's den just 24 hours after his move from Portsmouth, with American target Maurice Edu also at Ibrox to watch the action. Walter Smith makes two changes from the side who defeated Falkirk in last week's opener, with David Weir and Mendes replacing Steven Whittaker and Christian Dailly.
Hearts make one change from their 3-2 win over Motherwell. Jamie McDonald replaces Steve Banks in goal, with new keeper Marian Kello named on the bench.
1438: "�100 on a Hearts win the day. Fill yer boots." Mr-Souta � on 606 Join the debate on 606
The Jambos were quoted yesterday at 6/1 to emerge victorious in Glasgow. Let's have more predictions for how it's all going to pan out today...in fact, why not play our fantastically addictive Predictor game here:
St Mirren's new loan signing Scott Cuthbert makes his debut for the Paisley side at Love Street. The Celtic defender replaced Will Haining who was suspended after being sent off in the 1-0 defeat against the Parkhead side last week. Manager Gus MacPherson makes three other changes, Hugh Murray, Stephen McGinn and Tom Brighton all dropped to the bench, replaced by Gary Mason, Tonet and Jim Hamilton.
Kilmarnock's new signing Donovan Simmons starts on the bench as Jim Jefferies makes one change from the side which beat Hibernian 1-0 last week, defender Frazer Wright replacing Ryan O'Leary who is out with a shoulder injury.
1432: Any more examples of people who have gone on mad shopping sprees? Join the debate on 606
1428: Chick is now talking to Gers' assistant boss Ally McCoist about splashing the cash. He mentions infamous football pools winner Viv Nicholson and who blew a fortune in a short space of time back in the sepia-tinted 1960s. Does anyone remember Viv? What happened to her? She recorded a song with her brother called 'Spend, spend, spend' and appeared on the front cover of The Smiths' single Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now. McCoist is suitably bemused...
1420: "Walter's trolley dash! If only it was Jimmy Calderwood - the one and only Don Winton." mintytalksmince on 606 Join the debate on 606
1415: Chick 'Exclusive' Young has revealed that Mendes will start for Rangers at Ibrox. What do Rangers fans think of the recent flurry of signings? How fill Walter Smith find the right blend?
1404: As I said on the My Sport thread, Rangers are getting rid of their Carlos Cuellar booty like Richard Pryor in the 1985 remake of Brewsters Millions! BBC Radio Scotland's Chick Young says a deal to finally snare Steve Davis from Fulham is is almost done. How many midfielders do Rangers have now? They've added Pedro Mendes, Valencia youngster Aaron Niguez Esclapez and USA international Maurice Edu in the last few days.
1401: Please join in with some pseudo-sophisticated gibbering as all the action unfolds.
This is how you discuss it: text me on 80295 and get involved via 606. There was some top-drawer chat last weekend so I'm expecting the same today. Join the debate on 606
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