The Leicester manager gives his inimitable views on football and life in general in his weekly column.
This week he talks about his team's continued struggle in the Championship and the renewed hope the January transfer window will bring.
He also reveals what he will be up to over the festive period, his foolproof plan for Christmas shopping and the plight of the poor turkey.
LEICESTER ON A BAD RUN
We're on the crest of a slump at the moment and I'm expecting a different attitude, a different work ethic.
We play Wolves on Saturday in the televised game. You know what it's like on the telly - everybody does their hair and they get a bit of a lift. We're up against one of the most enthusiastic teams in the division. Mick McCarthy's done a fantastic job and I'm in a similar situation to the one he was in.
 Now what shall I do with my hair? |
He inherited a load of overpaid players and he's brought in some fresh, hungry, enthusiastic players that have lifted the whole club, but he's a long way ahead of me.
I'm still unbelievably upbeat and positive about where this club will be in a year's time. It's tough at the moment but we've got to get a tin hat on, we've got to dig in and we've got to scrap. 
ACTIVITY IN THE JANUARY WINDOW?
I expect there will be. I've lifted a couple of kids from our academy and I've told about eight players that I don't want them and sent them away for Christmas.
I won't be spending much time with my family until after the transfer window unfortunately. My poor wife understands that.
I'm talking to my chief scout, Gary Penrice, more than I am to her at the moment. He's been staying over at my house and we're working our socks off to get some players that Leicester City fans will be very, very proud of.
 Move over, Mrs H, there's a new man in town |
I might have Christmas Day off after we've done training in the morning but I've never looked forward to four games over the Christmas period so much in my life.
The overall picture doesn't look good but we can do things in the window. How many other clubs down there can do that? 
ALL THE BEST TO PLYMOUTH
What I will say is that Plymouth backed me to the hilt and broke their transfer record three times for me last season.
The higher they get in the table, the better I feel about it. But Colchester finished two points above Argyle last season - and look what happened to them last summer. They lost seven players.
I was worried that might happen to Plymouth with only 11,000 gates. Because the better your players play, the more admirers they're going to get and all of a sudden the sharks come swimming.
 Just the man for the job |
Nothing fills me with more pride than when I see Plymouth beating Watford away - fantastic, they deserve it. Every player plays for that club with so much pride and passion and I hope they get to the Premier League.
There's been an awful lot of horrible things said, an awful lot of untruths spoken, but I'm at Leicester now and I'd like to think the Plymouth fans might wish me well, although I don't think they will.
I left them with probably the best team they've ever had and now they've got a great manager in Paul Sturrock, who's a top bloke, and I wish them all the best. 
CHRISTMAS IN THE NEW HOUSE
This is the third Christmas in a row I'll be in a different house. I've had four houses in the last 18 months.
We were shopping the other day and my wife thought 'that's nice but where will I put it?' - she couldn't remember what our rooms looked like, which is a bit worrying!
But we moved into our new house on the Sunday and had the Christmas tree up by the Monday (Dec 3), which isn't bad going. To be fair, it's been the busiest month of my life and the next two months will be really busy, then hopefully it will settle down a bit 
PUNTER'S QUESTION
Sabretooth: "Hi Ollie. Being the father of deaf children, perhaps you can help me out. I'm 21 years old, and I've been getting to know a really nice girl recently. She's sport-mad and we are really into each other. But she's also deaf and I really want to take the relationship further. I'm learning the sign language slowly, but I was wondering if you can give me some ideas for a Christmas present and on how to ask her out?"
Well, not knowing the girl I haven't got a clue about a Christmas present. I've lived with my wife for 20-odd years and I still don't know what to get her!
But it's brilliant that you've met someone. To me it doesn't matter whether you've lost a sense or not - they're still human beings underneath.
 | 606: DEBATE |
Until you learn the language you have to be very visual, smile a lot, be very expressive and you'll get over things. Deaf people are unbelievably receptive to anyone who wants to try and talk to them.
You have to be subtle with your touch when you want to get their attention - just touch them on the outside of their upper arm, otherwise you can jolt them.
And you have to turn the lights on and off if you're in a room to get their attention, or you can bang the floor with your foot so they pick up on the vibration.
But what a wonderful thing for you to want to learn sign language because you've met a wonderful person. I'm proud of you, son. 
PUNTER'S QUESTION II
Jonwollufs: "Hi Ollie. After saying you hadn't had time to think about Xmas shopping last week, I saw you Xmas shopping in Loughborough. Would you like to share with us what you had in your bags?"
My poor wife didn't know where she was, she forgot what house we were in and has never liked the worry of Christmas because I've always been too busy and left it to her.
So we sat down, before you saw me, had a cup of coffee, and I made a list of all the people we needed to buy for.
I decided on three shops where I could buy something for everybody - now that's planning!
Unfortunately Loughborough only had one of the shops, so we did a third of it there, then went to Leicester the following day and went to the other two shops. Job done, cash back, back of the net!!!
 You nicking my sayings again, Holloway? |
Now I just need to get in a couple of strikers for Leicester. We're joint-bottom as far as goals scored are concerned and you haven't got to be a genius to work it out.
Get some strikers, get some widemen to create the chances and Leicester will be climbing the table. End of story. And that's the same principle with which I do my Chrismtas shopping.

PUNTER'S QUESTION III
Kernowking: "What's your favourite Christmas carol?"
I don't know if I've got a favourite carol. Good King Wenceslas is probably the one I know best - although I can't spell it!
As for Christmas songs, I like Slade's Merry Christmas - Noddy Holder, he's got some enthusiasm that bloke - and Wizzard was good as well, I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday.
And there's that Chris Rea one - Driving Home For Christmas - times I've had to do that.
 It's Crissssss-massss!!! |
When I was a QPR player I had to go training on Christmas Day. I drove an hour and a half into training, trained for 45 minutes and then drove back home again. And when I put on the car radio, Chris Rea was singing Driving Home For Christmas, which was brilliant. 
IDEAL CHRISTMAS PRESENT?
I just want health and happiness for everyone who deserves it. It's a wonderful world, it's a wonderful life and it's just a shame that horrible things happen sometimes.
I really get saddened by the attitudes of some human beings. And why should there be starvation in the world these days when we're all so sophisticated?
Why should there be wars? Why is this still happening if we're a civilised group of people? I just want peace and happiness for everyone. 
CHRISTMAS DINNER
We'll be having a traditional Christmas dinner. I shall look forward to preparing it all on Christmas Eve with my good lady, Kim.
We've done it for a few years now and we have a little tot of whisky after we've finished it all. We've got a lovely Marks and Sparks turkey this year with bacon all over. A turkey crown I think it's called.
 Uh-oh, too late! |
I do feel guilty every year, though - I'm glad I'm not a turkey! What a horrible thing if you suddenly realised you were a turkey and it's November.
You see yourself in a reflection in the farmyard and you think 'God I'm a turkey and it's nearly Christmas!' What a horrendous thing to realise.
Before I go, I'd just like to wish everyone a great Christmas. HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO EVERYBODY! YOURS IN FOOTBALL, HO HO HO! 
Ian Holloway was talking to Chris Charles.
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