Tender Memories

A spiritual comment and prayer to start the day with Rabbi Oliver Joseph

Good morning.

Memories - they can both lift us up and set us back.

I was a teenager when my mum passed away and just ten years ago my little sister also died from cancer.

I cherish memories of these two vibrant women who shaped me. I also struggle facing those darker memories… when they faced uncertainty, tragedy, moments of great vulnerability.

My experiences have helped shape my chaplaincy to people living and working around London’s Canary Wharf. When I talk to somebody on the street .. in hospital…or prison….my job is to listen. A great many of our interactions are surface: “how are you?”, “how is your day? But the chaplain’s role is to hold awareness: “you have a story”, “the tapestry of your life, like mine, is one of joy, courage and sadness”. These are the deeper notes of our conversations, sometimes unspoken. The privilege of our work, alongside many cups of tea, is when people feel able to honestly share their journey.

In Jewish life memory is essential, each week, on Shabbat, the Jewish Sabbath, we recall the story of creation, ‘ma’aseh bereshit’, connecting us to the story of the Garden of Eden in which two people once stood making memories - good and bad. Against that, in the same moment, we remember the Exodus, ‘yit’tziat mitzrai’im’, and the deliverance of the Israelites from slavery.

Zooming out to this wider story -this bigger picture - challenges us to recast our own memories. My prayer this week would be for all of us to reflect on which memories shape us and which hold us back? Can we cherish and honour all of our memories and in the same breath gently let go of some, the ones that no longer serve us?