'It's like the Channel Tunnel!'

"Speaking of shoe menders," says Joe in Loughinisland, "whenever I started secondary school, which was about forty years ago, there was a boy in my class and his shoe size was fourteen and a half."

"My goodness!" says Sean.

"He played for the local Gaelic team and he was always told to take the points to win the match!"

"And rightly so," says Sean, "with a foot like that! Do you know that my father was of average height. Five foot ten or something like that. But he had a very small foot. He wore a size six. And look at the feet I have, I mean I was wearing the wrong size for about thirty years. I was wearing a size eight and I should have been wearing size eight and a half. I have very high insteps. It's like the Channel Tunnel. I'm waiting for a train to appear someday to run up the leg of my trousers."

With music from Lulu, Engelbert Humperdinck, The Box Tops, Dean Martin, and more.