Sara Cox sits in

Ruth Scott, Anglican Priest and Quaker:

Much to my surprise, I’ve found these last few weeks quite a challenge. I know how to ‘do’ being well, and how to ‘do’ being seriously ill, but recovery is another matter altogether. I identify very much with a character in the gospels who’s been out of action for many years. On meeting him Jesus asks, “Do you want to be healed?” It seems like a ridiculous question, but it’s so perceptive. Once he’s better the man will have to support himself instead of being able to rely on others, and he will lose his place in the community of broken people that have been his ‘family’ while he’s been ill. After Jesus heals him the man finds everything too much and goes to hide in the temple until Jesus turfs him out with the words, “See, you are well!” In other words – ‘get on with your life!’

I identify very much with this man. My body has been battered by cancer treatment and it’s taking longer than I’d like to get back up to speed. When I was ill I didn’t worry about anything because I was too ill to deal with normal demands. Now I’m recovering there are still times I don’t feel up to that task and want to run away and hide. As I’ve tried to understand this experience I’ve come to see that the story of the man Jesus heals is about much more than physical healing.

I think there’s a part of each of us that sometimes feels overwhelmed by life, and is paralysed into inactivity because we don’t know what to do. At such times we may want other people to sort out our problems for us, even though, with a little encouragement and faith we could work things through - I’ve found folk, including me, are usually much more capable than we realise. There are no simple answers: Becoming the person we have it in us to be is sometimes hard. But when I’m inclined to hold back, I repeat in my head the exclamation of Jesus, “See, you are well!, draw a deep breath, and take that first difficult step.