A Slanging Match Made in Heaven

Vera Sackcloth-Vest has promised her husband Henry, that her affair with Venus Traduces is at an end - but when Venus writes Vera a secret billet-doux, Vera is powerless to resist and makes hurried plans to meet Venus in London.

However, before she can leave Sizzlinghurst, Lady Utterline Amoral and Lytton Scratchy arrive unexpectedly to take a tour of the garden. Keen to see them leave, Vera's patience is put to the test in the face of Lady Utterline's snobbishness, insisting that Vera should follow her example and hold an annual garden party to raise money for the Red Cross.

Meanwhile, Henry is chased round the sofa by Lytton who, as an irrepressible gossip, lets slip that Vera and Venus are back together. His suspicions now confirmed, Henry insists on accompanying Vera down to London.

Produced by Jamie Rix
A Little Brother production for BBC Radio 4