The Top 5 Friends Episodes Of All Time

This weekend gone, I kicked a hornets' nest. I thought it was a truth universally acknowledged which Friends episode was unequivocally regarded as "the best" but... I was wrong. Really quite wrong, as it turns out.

I am not joking: there is a lot of debate out there. A lot.

Taking to Twitter to double check my presumption, I was hastily informed how wrong I was by a number of fine, upstanding, helpful and lovely people. Sure, there were many, many others who did agree with me, but those positive comments aren't the ones that circle round the washing machine of your mind as you try to get to sleep at night.

So here then are my personal, individual, entirely subjective top five episodes of that sitcom of sitcoms, Friends. Agree? Disagree? Come at me, bro. I can handle it. Maybe. On a good day.

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You remember this one! The good ol' "Geller Bowl" and the "Geller Cup" – a Troll doll nailed to a plank of wood – as well as the repeated requests to "go long" and plenty of physical japery as the gang slam into ground and bounce balls off each other's heads.

I've always liked any episode that properly reminds you that Monica and Ross are competitive siblings and/or lets David Schwimmer do some serious pratfalls. The man is a fantastic physical comedian, without a doubt. This episode also taught me the concept of "bunnying up", and for that alone I am truly grateful.

Favourite quote:

Monica: "Losers walk."
Ross: "Losers talk."
Chandler: "No, no actually, losers rhyme."

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Yes, it's the throwback '80s special, all massive shoulder pads and even bigger dresses. Ross's moustache and big curly hair! Rachel's "pre-surgery" fake nose! The first on-screen appearance of "Fat Monica"! Ah, good times.

There are loads of big, funny moments in this flashback episode but also plenty of important emotional beats. Here lies the emotional core to the Ross 'n' Rachel relationship, and it's for that reason Schwimmer himself has called it his favourite episode ever. If you look back on the show, this is one of those very, very important outings that allowed the series to show that it wasn't just a likeable - nay, loveable - brightly coloured gag delivery service, but something just that little bit deeper when it wanted to be. Remember: he's her lobster.

Favourite quote:

Joey: "Some girl ate Monica!"
Monica: "Shut up, the camera adds ten pounds."
Chandler: "Ah, so how many cameras are actually on you?"

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This is just a flat-out hilarious episode of Friends. There's some important plot stuff at play here - and not just Ross moving into Ugly Naked Guy's flat, though that's pretty huge - which really ramps up the delightful old-fashioned farce of Phoebe (knowing what's going on with Monica and Chandler) flirting with the man of the hour before the tables are turned and Chandler himself ups the ante, resulting in a jaw-droppingly awkward kiss. Or, as Phoebe puts it, "They don't know we know they know we know."

It's so perfectly delicious, what with Joey and Monica and Rachel listening in and the threat of Ross finding out... Man, it's just a great bit of TV, this one. What really tips it over the edge into "best of the best" territory is Chandler declaring his love and Monica reciprocating, leaving you with a well-earned hug of an ending to the increasingly cringey game of sexy chicken (my term). I'm getting a bit teary now, just thinking about it all.

Favourite quote:

Ross: "Get off my sister!"

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You may already know this, but there's a term for when all the characters of the show stay in the same place: a "bottle episode" and boy is this a good one. Ross is anxious because, well, no-one's ready - the clue's in the title I guess - and so almost everything we see is Rachel and Monica's apartment, our six besties flapping about and winding each other up. It's also notable because it plays out almost entirely in real time, which is a pretty impressive feat. If you like this sort of ep, may I remind you of 'The One With Monica's Thunder' and 'The One On The Last Night', both of which save money (and still deliver the goods) by keeping things centred around the core cast.

Curiously, critics were sniffy about this episode on its release but it's since proved popular with fans, perhaps because of all the voicemail fun, the "going commando" back and forth, Joey bursting in wearing all of Chandler's shirts, shorts and ties - "Could I be wearing any more clothes?" - and all that chicken fat drinking. Perhaps not, as I felt a little sick just writing that.

Favourite quote:

Chandler: "You know what's weird? Donald Duck never wore pants. But whenever he's getting out of the shower, he always puts a towel around his waist. I mean, what is that about?"

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Here it is: the one I thought we all agreed was undeniably the best Friends episode. 'The One With The Embryos' may be the name above the door, but we all know it as ''The One With The Quiz'. That competition factor that you already know I love is here - the characters getting childish and overexcited in the pursuit of some sort of bet always puts a smile on my face - as well as Phoebe's emotional rollercoaster of, well, the whole impregnation thing.

Every single question, every single answer... the entirety of the quiz is just superb. You learn more about the characters, you feel like you are part of the club, they all use screechy voices and jump up and down a lot and Ross even gets to do his TV quizmaster voice. And by the way, if you're wondering who knows the six better than the rest, it's Ross himself, after all he's the one who put the quiz together, and in not a lot of time to boot.

All of the Friends are at the peak of their powers, delivering witty one-liners when they're their most "themselves", a decent while before certain members began to distort into funhouse mirror doppelgangers of their season one characters. It's just perfect lightning-in-a-bottle stuff, capped off with them actually swapping apartments. Other shows wouldn't have the cajones to actually deliver on the bet, but here we are with a very annoyed Rachel grumping around as Chandler and Joey ride into "her" flat riding a giant white dog on wheels.

And while I will pick my favourite quote, I should also give shout-outs to the following moments: "Viva Las Gay-gas", the towel categories, Miss Chanandler Bong, "This is a girls' apartment!", the "Are you in there little foetus?" song and the understandable fear of Michael Flatley, Lord Of The Dance. It's all gold, honestly and truly it really is.

Favourite quote:

Monica: "Something to do with transponding..."
Rachel: "Oh oh... he's a trans... a transponster!"
Monica: "THAT'S NOT EVEN A WORD!"