Only joking of course.

But check out Northern Irish indie band Two Door Cinema Club's big red button above, which has appeared in east London.

Scroll down for new music from (some of ) The Maccabees, a campaign to build a statue of Keith Flint, a new feminist Britney musical and another K Pop star falls foul of a sex scandal.

Oh, and Olly Murs is a cartoon dog.

Nope we haven't a Scooby either...

Continuing the frightening theme now to finish today...

The director's follow up to his Oscar-nominated Get Out, starring Lupita Nyong'o is out last this month.

The newly-announced soundtrack includes tracks by Janelle Monae and Minnie Riperton.

As well as a frankly terrifying remix of Luniz' 1995 hip hop banger I Got 5 On it, which you can hear above.

Do yourself a favour, don't listen alone...

Image source, Getty Images

I've had one desire since I was born / To see my body ripped and torn.

The lyrics of death metal band Bloodbath's cannibalism-themed track, Eaten, do not leave much to the imagination. But neither this song - nor the gruesome lyrics of others of the genre - inspire violence.

That is the conclusion of Macquarie University's music lab, external, which used the track in a psychological test.

It revealed death metal fans are not "desensitised" to violent imagery.

The findings are published, external in the Royal Society journal Open Science,

"[Death metal] fans are nice people," said Prof Bill Thompson, from the Australian university, which is based in Sydney. "They're not going to go out and hurt someone."

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It might not land her a headline slot on the Pyramid Stage at Glasto but it could prove invaluable to fill awkward silences at her next dinner party.

The movie actress showed off her teeth flicking skills to the tune of Despacito on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon.

Keira's hubby James Righton used to be in Mercury-winning new ravers The Klaxons.

This could be a glimpse at his new direction.

It has some bite to it...

We featured singer-songwriter/footballer Chelcee Grimes in a Newbie Tuesday slot last year and now she is a presenter on the BBC.

Check out her interview and kick about with fellow Liverpool fan and rapper Yungen.

The Fulham Ladies player even nutmegs him but wait to see who wins the crossbar challenge.

Will there be a collab off the pitch?

Image source, Getty Images

The Glasto headliner's book imprint, which launched last year, has announced a new competition "to find the best writer of a new generation".

The Merky Books new writers' prize, launched in collaboration with The Good Literary Agency and First Story, will reveal its shortlist on 2 May - so budding scribes haven't got long.

The winner, selected by a panel of judges including the man himself, will be announced on 6 June.

The grime star said: "I know too many talented writers that don’t always have an outlet or a means to get their work seen and hopefully #Merky Books can now be a reference point for them to say 'I can be an author' and for that to be a realistic and achievable goal.

All shortlisted writers will be invited to a free workshop hosted by Penguin.

Read more, external about how to enter or watch their educational video above.

As well as putting out his first book, Rise Up, last year, 2018 also saw the rapper launch a Cambridge scholarship for black students.

The BBC's Sound of 2018 winner finally got around the releasing her debut album last week and Sucker Punch is currently in a race with Foals and Dido for this week's number one.

She is also due to play Radio 1's Big Weekend in Middlesbrough in May and has been telling the station about her music and how she got started "properly" in the biz.

She was only 18 but apparently "already knew myself".

Duran Lantink created the Grammy-nominated musician's trousers for her ode to the female anatomy; Pynk, which quickly became an internet sensation.

He's been speaking to BBC Minute, external about the inspiration for the trousers, which include the "empowerment of women" and "equal rights."

Janelle's reaction to seeing them for the first time in the, erm... flesh, was apparently to jump up and down and scream "they're even more beautiful than the pictures."

Check out the video above.

Image source, Getty Images

"He was a wonderful person," says David Austin. "A caring, kind, giving man.

"It never stops amazing me how he touched people and how much love there is for him."

He's been speaking to the BBC whilst casting his eye over George Michael's art collection, which is on display at Christie's, external in London before going under the hammer on Thursday.

He recalls Michael's final months - before he died on Christmas Day 2016 - fondly, remembering how George dealt with a couple of over-enthusiastic fans.

"I remember sitting in a restaurant one evening and people were looking across thinking, 'Ooh, it's George Michael!'" he told our music reporter Mark Savage.

"I got up to go to the toilet, and when I came back he was having a cup of tea with two women at the next table. They were just talking about life and their problems, and I was like, 'What is going on here?'

"That was a small moment, but it was important - because that's exactly who he was. Everybody warmed to him, from Princess Diana to those two women in the restaurant."

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Deadline Hollywood

Alice and Angelo Clary; the parents of the disgraced singer's live-in girlfriend, Azriel Clary, have been telling CBS's Gayle King that they feel like they've "failed" their daughter.

The couple appeared in the controversial recent Lifetime docuseries, Surviving R. Kelly, saying their daughter met the star - who is accused of a series of sexual offences, which he denies - when she was an aspiring teenage singer and went on tour with him.

They now haven’t seen Azriel in three years and believe she’s been brainwashed.

"I feel like I failed my daughter because I should have saw different signs,” said Angelo.

“I should have saw the change in my baby girl instead of the love that we instilled in her, that she was showing us and putting on a charade.

"So guess what? We can take responsibility. But to the world, how much responsibility did R. Kelly take?"

Watch a clip above.

Image source, Getty Images

Felix, Hugo and Will White from the now sadly departed indie band appear on Oxford singer-songwriter Charlie Cunningham’s new track.

Since leaving the band, Felix has enjoyed a slight career change, as a cricket journalist while also running his own music label Yala! Records.

But he's arguably back doing what he does best playing the six-string on Sink in.

"Very happy to have chipped in on guitar on this beautiful song alongside my brothers," he tweeted.

Check it out below.

The Oxford band, who are currently on course to land their first ever UK number one album with Everything Not Saved Will Be Lost - Part 1.

Last week, they performed select tracks from the brilliant (in our humble MNL opinion) album for Radio 1.

They also covered a former Newbie Tuesday artist who hails from the Caribbean - teenager star Au/Ra and her track Panic Room.

If you find yourself at a loss for things to do this lunchtime, you could spend a worse four and half minutes than by clicking play above.

Image source, MARCO VITTUR

Simon Mayo has been speaking to the BBC about the launch of his new show on a brand new classical station, Scala Radio - just three months after his departure from Radio 2.

To succeed, Scala - which bills itself as 'classical music for modern life' - will have to have a significantly different offer from existing classical stations, which Mayo argues it does.

"Radio 3 and Classic FM do what they do very well," he acknowledges. "The assessment here is there's an audience that is waiting for the opportunity to join this world.

"Of course we'll play you the big songs by the big composers, but there's also the new stuff, the soundtracks, the video games, TV themes, that people want to hear.

"So I think the main gap in the market is that we've always said, unashamedly, that we're an entertainment station."

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The former Eternal singer-turned-actor (above left) has announced she is returning to the cast of the 9 to 5 musical adaptation of the Dolly Parton film after having been forced to pull out through injury.

The 44-year-old, who plays the role of Violet Newstead, fractured her wrist and suffered a cut to her chin in a "nasty" fall on her way to rehearsals but will now get back on the bike, or rather stage, on 25 March at London's Savoy Theatre.

Writing on Instagram, she said: "So it's now official. I am going to be rejoining the west end cast of @9to5themusicaluk on Monday 25th March until 29th June. Hope to see you there."

Showbiz eh? What a way to make a living.

More than 3,500 people have signed a petition to erect a statue of the late Prodigy frontman in the town of Braintree.

Flint, who died last week at the age of 49, co-formed the band with producer Liam Howlett in the town in the late 80s.

"Keith was important to not only the people of Braintree, but was well loved and respected worldwide and a pivotal piece of the music industry," the petition reads, external.

"Braintree being The Prodigy’s home town we should remember him.

"My parents generation had the Beatles & The Rolling Stones. My generation had The Prodigy, Manchester has Oasis, Braintree has The Prodigy."

Earlier this week, an inquest heard the cause of death was hanging, while toxicology reports were awaited.

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The US DJ/production trio and the Aussie pop rockers have joined forces on their new track, Who Do You Love?

They performed it for Jimmy Fallon last night on US TV.

The stage set up suggests a right Battle of the Bands scenario.

We're not picking sides but if it did kick off then 5 Seconds of Summer do have an extra member.

Thankfully it's all peace and (unrequited) love and you can check it above.

Seeing as it's #NoSmokingDay, we should add that we do not approve of the name of the band on the left of your screen.

New York Times

Image source, Getty Images

Broadway theatre owner James L. Nederlander has announced that Britney's greatest hits will provide the backdrop for a new musical featuring classic fairy tale princesses.

Once Upon a One More Time is scheduled to go into production in Chicago in the autumn before a possible move to Broadway.

Although it will be soundtracked by Britney, it's not a retelling of her life. It's about a fortnightly book club whose members include Snow White, Cinderella, Rapunzel and Sleeping Beauty.

After Grimms’ fairy tales they are introduced to a feminist tome and go on a voyage of self-discovery.

Read more, external

A show using the music of songwriter to the stars, Max Martin, and based on Shakespeare's character Juliet will open in London's West End later this year.

Image source, Getty Images

The supergroup are to perform their first live gig in eight years at the 10th anniversary celebrations for Jack White’s Third Man Records in Nashville.

The mini-festival on 6 April will be headlined by White and his band, which includes singer-songwriter Brendan Benson, Jack Lawrence, and Patrick Keeler.

Last year, The Raconteurs released two new tracks and revealed they are working on their first album since 2008's Consolers of the Lonely.

More details below in case you happen to be in the area.

Image source, Getty Images

A demo believed to contain the first recording of David Bowie's Starman has fetched £51,000 at auction.

The 1971 tape had gathered dust in a loft for almost 50 years after Bowie's guitarist Mick Ronson gave it to his friend Kevin Hutchinson, an aspiring musician.

But after listening to the song, Mr Hutchinson labelled it "David Bowie rehearsal tape" and packed it away in the attic.

The demo was auctioned on Tuesday in Merseyside.

Mr Hutchinson said of his decision to sell the demo: "I'm 65... I've started what they call on TV 'decluttering.'"

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Image source, Getty Images

A second K-pop star in a week has quit the music business amid a sex scandal.

Jung Joon-young admitted to secretly filming himself having sex with women and sharing the footage.

"I admit to all my crimes," said Jung in a statement.

"I filmed women without their consent and shared it in a chatroom, and while I was doing so I didn't feel a great sense of guilt," said Jung in the statement released late on Tuesday.

Jung, who is accused of taping 10 or more women, is due to be questioned by Seoul Metropolitan Police on Thursday.

It follows news that another South Korean star, Seungri from the group Big Bang quit the industry after he was charged with sex bribery.

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