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"Like a meerkat in a mineshaft." The Archers Listener Discussions to 19 April 2015.

Radio 4

The hunt for Scruff was televised, as Rev Kate Bottley on Channel 4's Gogglebox was seen with a Scruff teacosy.

Plus the Ambridge poet laureate crown goes to Philippa Vereker on Facebook. Altogether now - "Bring him home! Bring him home!"...

The snow glows white on Lakey Hill tonight,

Not a paw print to be seen.

A kingdom of isolation

And it looks like he's the King.

The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside

Couldn't keep it in,

Heaven knows he's tried.

Please let him in

Don't let him hide

Be the good boy we know he is inside (the conservatory)

Conceal, don't feel,

Don't let him go

So now we know

Bring him home, bring him home

Can't hold it back any more

Bring him home, bring him home

Bring him home to Ambridge Hall.

I don't care what Sean O Connor says

Let the floods rage on

The cold never bothered him anyway (Well it does, but he's way too polite to say ......)

Lilian returned with a new look and Brian showed some remarkable diplomacy...

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Watch the clip: Brian reacts to Lilian's botox...

Typical Lillian approach to a major life change: go for a surface change that gives you a temporary lift! She'll get over Tiger with Botox, cig's & drinkies! At least she isn't self-righteous & pseudo spiritual, like Kate! [Maggie Mumford on Facebook]

You have to keep redoing it otherwise you end up looking worse than when you started- apparently. [Jane Oliver on Facebook]

Shula trended as she faced burnt souffles, Alistair's cold shoulder and an old flame...

Alistair gambling again? [Julia Derbyshire on Facebook]

Dr Richard Locke was a follower of the Sealed Knot re-enactment society if I recall correctly. I'm mildly disappointed that he did not slip into his SK character while administering Rob's DNA test: "Zounds, man! Enough of this blackguardy! Didst thou lie with the wench?" [Duncan Wills on Facebook]

We all got what we wanted for Helen's birthday as Rob took the paternity test...

Great birthday ... An egg and a row. Cheers Rob [Jane Oliver on Facebook]

Best possible outcome: Susan Carter finds out about Rob's DNA test. Here's hoping the doctor's receptionist is a Horrobin! [Judy Fovargue on Facebook]

And finally, a lesson in pronunciation from Jennifer...

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