But Doc, think how bad it is when you’ve spent catual money to watch a movie that turns out to be a bag of #!*/.

Ho-ho Marky Mark! 10 films worse than Bride Wars and the clock officially runs out on December 31st, so you've got all those terrible Christmas films to sit through. You are cutting it awfully close, sir!

jayfurneaux, why would any sane, post-pubescent person spend their own hard earned cash going to see "Dance Flick"?



I know you have issues with Quentin, but grouping Inglorious B*sterds in with Dance Flick is a bit harsh isn't it?

Can you do another post of you watching Let the Right One In or Pan's Labyrinth? Just to restore our faith in cinema..? I feel depressed watching a mirrored reaction to when I watch dung such as Transformers 2 or Dance Flick.



The worst is when I have sit with a bunch of adolescent teenagers who find White Chicks or Meet the Spartans funny. While this happens, my face melts and my posture sinks. Oh, and The Hurt Locker is on limited screens while this happens.



Hopefully, you'll find that The Hurt Locker will put a smile on your face. Hopefully...



Keep up the good work Dr. K

Dr Mark, are you going to post the Worse Than Bride Wars chart yet? Obviously Dance Flick and Transformers 2 will be there; my guess for the remaining three is Terminator: Salvation, Observe and Report and Year One.



I am really worried. Not only does Sherlock Holmes come out at the tail end of the year but I just found out that a sequel to St. Trinian's will be coming out at the exact same time. This cannot be.

supa-dave I wouldn’t touch Dance Movie with a proverbial – but the last time I got badly caught out was with Mike Leigh’s `Happy-Go-Lucky`. Still the words ‘Mike Leigh’ should have warned me, I’ve never really warmed to his films. But critics said it was a ‘British feel-good comedy’ and its lead actress got good notices and it was even showing at my local art house.



However, it took only a few minutes for the full horror to sink in. Badly made, no real attempt at a script, utterly un-charming, irritating and worst of all not a laugh in anywhere in sight. After half an hour I left - it was that or start screaming for it to stop whilst gouging out my eyes to stop my ears up with.



Come to think of it, if the cinema offered me a free-pass to Dance Movie as compensation I might take it. DM might get one snigger out of me, however terrible the rest of it may be.



I’m passing on QT’s version of ‘Allo Allo’, but am getting some hopes up for: Hurt Locker, Inception, District 9, Cirque Du Freak, Up, an animated movie called ‘9’ and even Avatar.

The only people who think it must be fun to be a film critic are the kind of credulous weirdos who thought Transformers was great. I feel your pain, Dr. K.

Really? The Doktor didn't like Observe and Report? Now I'm surprised. I thought it was a great send-up of Paul Blart and all the Apatow man-child so-called comedies – not funny, but biting commentary on how scary these movies would really be.



But then, I also enjoyed Inglourious Basterds (though mostly the scenes with Waltz) and am considering whether this is actually a deconstruction of revenge flicks – just that I don't think Tarantino would want to do such a thing, but that doesn't mean I can't see it that way. And that might even make it a great movie.

Slightly off-topic, but given the good doctor's infamous run-in with the Video Appeals Committee, I was just wondering if he was going to give us a comment regarding the recent news that the 1984 Video Recordings Act was never officially enacted and cannot legally be enforced?



It will take about three months before the act can actually be passed again - what 18-certificate movies does Mark think under-18s should run out and see before THE MAN blocks them again?

More of this sort of thing! Not only is there great pleasure to be found in affectionate schadenfreude; it is good to reflect on how much dismal garbage poor critics must sit through (then write on and discuss) for their stingy wage.

and do these tip us over the set number of films worse than bride wars?

If I was getting paid to do something I loved I wouldn't be whinging about it.



Hurt Locker isn't great, technically brilliant with an interesting structure, but it left me empty as the characters weren't sufficiently well drawn to make me care about them thus completely undercutting any tension. I felt it was an overrated Hollywood directors attempt to do something different that falls flat. Hurt Locker is an overly earnest, smug statement about the nature of modern war that ultimately defaults to cliched characters and situations. It's little more than Point Break in Iraq with bomb suits instead of surf boards.

I lol'd. :D

I would rather watch Danceflick than do taxes tbh.

Mark, have you seen the film Sin Nombre? I don't think you reviewed it on the radio programme, do you have any thoughts on it?

You know there is a getout for Kermode which is pretty simple, though it may endanger his status as a film critic, but it's this : simply avoid the other films you suspect to occupy the list :



'Oh I have more term papers to mark';

'Oh I'm doing an Andy Warhol special for The Culture Show';

'Oh, sorry, but I have to fly out to LA to interview Michael Bay for his remake of Brazil'.



You get the idea.

Cool! David Lynch is filming these things now!

I DIDNT THINK YOU WERE GOING TO EVEN TOUCH UPON 'DANCE FLICK'...

... well said?

you appear to have intensified your opinions on inglourious basterds, when you reviewed it, you said that the set pieces were good but the film as a whole lacked discipline, but now you're implying that the whole film bored you. you're doing that escelation thing where you're fighting for one side of the arguement, and so in order to counteract the opposing arguement, you make yours more extreme than your true feelings. you should be thoroughly ashamed of yourself.

I wonder if the Oscars will use any of those films to show what a good year in film it has been. when they do the opening montage for next year as they all do. Or if they will admit to this probably being one of the worst years for American cinema for film quality.

I cannot sympathise I'm afraid. It's your job. Get over it.



I would love your job by the way if you ever feel like giving it all up.

Oh it all rings so true Dr. M. I go to a lot of premieres and studio screenings so I was wondering, how do you deal with the, sometimes unavoidable, situation of being cornered by a studio suit after the screening asking you "what you thought"? Do you :-

a) Lie, and tell them it was the best thing you've seen all week?

b) Leave just before the credits roll, in the hope of avoiding them?

c) Tell them the celluloid damning truth?



I always tend to go for c. Half the time the people from the studios dont watch their own films, so I think they need to get the truth from someone

Interested in your thoughts

Keep up the good work

Thanks for your last video Doctor (A Night at the Movies with the Doc!). I have never understood why your reviews were and are so different from any other critic but now i absolutely appreciate where it is coming from ( I did like to think: an honest heart with a well informed taste in Cinema). And as an aspiring filmmaker you have stirred me away from going into filmmaking for money to doing it for more abstract reasons. Thanks for that gift.

Another classic.

Brilliant. That grimace at the end was priceless.

excellent video



however I've one gripe, why include inglourious basterds?

saw the film last night and I was actually stunned at how amazing it was, it is definitely amongst his very best



it's my favourite film of the year and I cannot wait to see it again, maybe even twice



I'm afraid I'm gonna have to side with Ebert on this one



If it was some new director's debut, you would labelling him the second coming



I get the feeling yourself and Bradshaw are being a bit contrary



I have a feeling its status will rise

mark



can you get someone to film you viewing '2 girls 1 cup?



that i would like to see

So this is what it looks like when the good doctor rages.

I made the error of seeing 'Inglourious Basterds' with a very big hangover.

Which made it seem twice as long (and loud).



Just wanted to know one thing.

Did I miss a history lesson? Because I think it might have worked a little better if the ending was not based on fantasy island.

As Hitler & Co came to a more banal finale to their lives, or did I have a hangover in that lesson to?

Your reviews are becoming more cinematic by the week Doc. I was piddling myself at your Transformers 2 'review'. I aso show it to anyone who'll watch it. Aren't iPhones great.



I thought your IB 'review' was a tad mean. But I understood it. Some of those scenes are a bit long.



I see someone else complaining it was loud. Can and shound war movies be quiet now?



Whatever you think, I'm sure we can agree that Waltz was brilliant, was he not?

This comment was removed because the moderators found it broke the house rules. Explain.

forgive my ignorance, but wot is this 'doctor' moniker? Akin to 'Dr Fox' the DJ, or a PhD in film studies? Certainly makes you seem intelligent...I think..

confused about haloween being American as kids we used to go 'guising' or was this just a Scottish thing

https://video.saatchigallery.com/artist/profile/29383/Nick+Clark/NickClark.html



I made this for £50.



Whilst not the film I want to make, I think it's better than some films which are made for millions.



I would love to know Mr. Kermodes thoughts - the poor chap looks so bored during some current fare about claptrap.

I hope he does another one. Not only did he have me close to stiches but he is right about most of the bad toch on the cinema.