Parents and teenagers often don't see eye to eye when it comes to what teens are consuming online. Mobile phones and devices are hard to monitor - often begging the questions - what are they seeing and is it appropriate?
BBC Bitesize has an exciting new series, Solve the Story, which gives teenagers lots of insights to the digital world and aims to help improve their media literacy. To reflect the themes in the Solve the Story, we asked an expert in parenting and child development, Dr Martha Deiros Collado, for tips and advice to support your teenager as they navigate life online.
By clinical psychologist and practitioner Dr Martha Deiros Collado
Even though children and teenagers are often called ‘digital natives’, they weren't born automatically knowing how to navigate the online world in a healthy and age-appropriate way.
During adolescence, while their brains are still developing, teenagers are figuring out who they are. Misinformation online can amplify uncertainty and become overwhelming. Teens often struggle to filter credible sources because their brains aren't yet mature enough to do this effectively. Conflicting information can create confusion, which increases stress and can lead teenagers to experience anxiety.
If parents assume their teenager is an ‘expert’ in digital spaces, leaving them to explore this digital world alone or with friends, this can undermine their confidence and, over time, can erode trust and limit open conversations about online experiences.
Parents and carers need to build their own media literacy so they can help children develop critical thinking and emotional regulation online. This means teaching them to pause, question and think before reacting impulsively to online content. Here are nine ways you can help:
Help teenagers question what they see online
The part of the brain that handles reasoning and impulse control, the prefrontal cortex, is still developing until the mid-to-late twenties. Teenagers rely more on rewards than adults, which makes them more vulnerable to sensational content online. When they feel uncertain, they often seek quick answers and validation from peers. This can lead to compulsive scrolling, reinforcing anxiety and reducing their ability to tolerate ambiguity.
If parents don’t create an atmosphere of open and honest dialogue at home - where the digital world is discussed and thought about as much as real-life experiences - teenagers may hesitate to share what they’ve seen or heard online thus enforcing this choice of only seeking peer validation. It also means their safe adults miss the chance to clarify, reassure and support them in navigating confusing or distressing content.
Help your teenager build media-literacy habits by encouraging them to ask themselves three simple questions whenever they go online:
Who benefits from seeing this content?
How do I know if this is a fact and not just an opinion?
What might happen if I share this online?
You could write these questions on a sticky note and place it somewhere your teenager is most likely to go online. Use them as informal discussion points around the dinner table to open conversations about the ‘digital snacks’ you’ve all consumed that day.
Explore the motives behind online content
Talk about why someone might share a story, video or post. How does it benefit them? Who might lose out when this information is spread?
Helping teenagers think about the motives behind online creators and content encourages them to stay critical of what they consume and more willing to explore other sources to confirm or challenge what they see.
Use real-life examples to start conversations
Story-based learning is one of the most powerful ways to help teenagers build resilience and develop reasoning skills for the digital challenges they may encounter. Stories create a safe space for teenagers to explore content that might spark big emotions. When they engage with stories and relatable characters, they practise seeing the world through someone else’s eyes, which strengthens empathy, social understanding and emotional intelligence.
As an adult, you likely go online every day. Use your own experiences of videos, news headlines or viral stories as examples to discuss with your teenager. Show them what you’ve seen or read and ask how it makes them feel, what thoughts it brings up, and whether they think it’s real, factual or misinformation. If you disagree, treat it as an opportunity to research together and find the truth as best you can. Sharing your own experiences normalises media literacy, and learning together helps these skills stick.
Protect sleep by removing screens from bedrooms at night
A simple but powerful house rule is keeping screens, including phones, out of bedrooms overnight. Phones away at bedtime are linked to better sleep and lower anxiety in teenagers, and even charging a phone in the bedroom has been shown to delay sleep by up to 20 minutes.
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Embed healthy screen habits at home
Create clear, healthy screen habits in your household. Agree ‘safe screen’ areas in communal spaces and ‘screen-free’ areas where phones and devices aren’t used. This helps your teenager’s brain and body switch off from the online world and reduces the risk of late-night doom-scrolling.
Help teenagers balance online and offline life
Heavy screen use can sometimes mask stress or a need to avoid difficult real-world emotions. Going online can feel like coping, but it can also worsen anxiety and create a negative cycle.
Rather than lecturing your teenager to “spend less time online”, focus on protecting time for enjoyable offline activities. Notice when you’re least likely to reach for your phone. Is it when you’re out of the house, socialising or doing something engaging? Think about how you can create more of these moments in ways that include your teenager and their interests.
Create an open, judgement-free dialogue
Teenagers won’t remember lectures about screen time, but they will remember how you made them feel. Instead of telling them off, ask curious, open questions such as: “What did you see online today?”, “Who did you talk to?”, or “Did you see anything funny, scary or weird?”
Keep it a dialogue rather than an inquest and share your own online experiences too. This approach helps your teenager feel safe enough to talk and reflect.
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Talk to understand, not just to advise
When adults talk to teenagers about the online world, it’s often to deliver a message. While guidance matters, understanding comes first. When teenagers feel seen and understood, they’re far more likely to listen.
Start conversations by empathising with their experience before offering advice. This might sound like, “Thank you for telling me your cousin sent you that video. I can see why you found it funny.” Trust is the foundation of support, and without open communication, you can’t help guide them through what they’re experiencing online.
Be vulnerable and share your own experiences
To truly connect with your teenager, show your human side. Talk openly about mistakes you’ve made online or moments that triggered strong emotions, whether that was an unkind message, comparison on social media or feeling left out.
Share what helped you cope, such as taking a break from screens or talking to someone you trust. When teenagers hear that you’ve faced similar challenges, it reassures them they’re not alone and makes it easier for them to open and see things from a new perspective.
Solve the Story is a six-part series from BBC media literacy specialists Other Side of the Story. It's designed for classroom use in supporting young people's understanding of life online and internet safety.
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