This article was first published in February 2020.
Just ten more minutes, just one more level. Gaming can be a great way to build confidence and make friends. It can be an escape from everyday stresses. But how do you know when your enjoyment of gaming is becoming a problem?
Learn how Liv and Daniel spotted the signs their gaming was becoming unhealthy, and learned how to manage their gaming habits.
I realised my gaming was becoming a bit problematic when I was spending literally all of my time in my flat. All my friends were meeting up and doing stuff and I would choose just to stay in and play games. I got this like really bad pain in my arm and I kept on getting this kind of weird like nerve twitch in my eye. I really knew deep down it was because I was just on my laptop staring at a screen for just way too long and the pain in my arm was just from clicking and moving and just playing for all the hours that was slipping past like every day.
So I have a specific condition called Asperger's syndrome*, which is part of an autism spectrum disorder. It meant that primary school, secondary school was super difficult for me because I didn't understand myself and what was going on and nobody else knew how to help me. So that chaos and that chaotic kind of nature of the environment was difficult for me. So I kind of used gaming as a way to escape life from the busyness of it, just to have something completely alien, almost literally in some cases to my environment so I could just escape in that and really focus on that.
About two years ago, I was just on my computer one day and I was feeling really down and I was on the App Store and I was like, ah, I haven't played that for like 12 years. And so I downloaded it. And as soon as I opened it up, I just became completely re-immersed in it and all the joy I got from playing like these simulation games was just so nice. The same feeling I had when I was like playing it when I was about 15 and it was the summer holidays and it was like a lovely day outside and my parents were like, "Why don't you go for a walk or hang out in the garden?" I was like "No! I want to play the game!" I was then just like playing it until like 3am, 4am, I would wake up like an hour early so I could like play a bit before having to go to work because I knew if I didn't, I would just be like craving it all day.
When I was playing this one game where you had to collect certain types of little monsters. And my worst nightmare came true one day I lent it to my friend and he erased my game. And I was so I was distraught I couldn't believe this had happened. And then I was like thinking to myself, "Oh my goodness, why are you so concerned with the game? There's so much more life to be had out there and you're concerned about a game saving over your game," and that really made me think about my choices of like, "Oh my goodness, this is a bit of an obsession. Gaming is now ruling my life."
To enable myself to quit gaming, I challenged myself to a game of, "Hey, Dan, how long can you go without actually touching the games console or playing a game?" So it became this thing of how many hours can I go? How many days can I go without? How many weeks can I go without? How many months? How many years? And then that's it. The rest is, as they say, history.
I found myself trying to focus on other things aside from gaming. So like in my flat, I would go through recipe books and find new things to cook. I bought a few books that I would just leave around the place to kind of be like "oh… remember books!?" I sort of started to think about playing the game that I was most into as more of a treat.
I picked up music and playing different instruments when I was about 16 and around about the time I quit gaming. But then I joined a band and I was making music and I was touring around the country and I was playing and I played at crazy, crazy shows. And those, those times I spent making music and learning to play music was actually way more productive than the time I spent gaming.There are days that I just want to like stay in bed and play games all day and just be cosy and be on my own. And before I would just give in to that. But it was laced with a feeling of guilt. My attitude has changed towards it. I still do that and I make sure that it's for much less time. For me like there definitely were times where I was thinking like right, my playing games is probably having an effect on my mental and my physical health and luckily in those times I kind of spoke to friends about it all, just like checked in with myself and was like, okay, this is maybe something I need to reassess. And I did.
Someone said to me, hey do you think gaming is a bad thing because it gets a bad stick in the press and I don't believe that's the case, but at the same time, I believe that certain types of gaming and certain amounts of gaming can be bad for your health. If you feel like gaming is giving you mental and physical issues, definitely reach out for professional help.
Gaming can give you like such a sense of achievement in such a short space of time but it's quite nice to start noticing when you can actually get that same rush of achievement from other stuff as well.
*The term Asperger syndrome is used in this video and has ceased to be used by medical professionals as a diagnosis. However, some people who are autistic do still choose to refer to themselves as having Asperger Syndrome.
Here are some signs that a gaming routine is getting unhealthy:
Choosing gaming over IRL (in-real-life) relationships and activities
Liv loved simulation games – they felt like a world she could control and could turn to when life got tough. Soon Liv found herself playing whenever she could, including cancelling plans with her friends so she could stay in and game. If you notice you’re prioritising gaming over IRL relationships and activities, try to switch your focus to other activities you can do instead, such as reading or cooking; and prioritise that face-to-face social time with friends and family whenever you can.
Getting overly emotional because of gaming
Daniel turned to gaming as an escape whilst struggling at school. He started to question his priorities when he got overly emotional at a friend about losing one of his saved games. Daniel decided to challenge himself to spend a few hours, then weeks, then months without gaming to ‘test’ how long he could go without it. He found himself spending more time doing other things – such as music – which felt more productive. If you find yourself getting upset or shouting at the screen, it might be time to hit save and exit, at least for a little while!
When your physical or mental health are being affected
When Liv started to experience physical pain in her hand and a twitch in her eye, she knew gaming was getting too much. Liv started to focus on other activities around the house, such as cooking and reading, and she switched up her gaming routine. Although Liv didn’t cut gaming out completely, she played for fewer hours and used gaming as a ‘treat’ or a ‘reward’ after completing other tasks. Playing less and for specified times gives you back control. Not only will it contribute to your wellbeing, it can also allow you to enjoy gaming without feelings of guilt. Level up!
How can you maintain a healthy relationship with gaming?
Prioritise IRL relationships and activities
Spending time with friends or family when you can, or doing activities away from screen time is important in maintaining good mental health and wellbeing. If you aren’t sure what else to do other than gaming, this could be a good time to explore other things you are interested in and develop some new hobbies.
Use gaming as a treat or reward
Although gaming can be an escape, make sure you don’t ignore issues in your life that are stressing you out. Coursework building up? Get it done, then reward yourself with a game, and enjoy gaming without the guilt.
Don’t be afraid to talk about it
If you’re worried about how gaming is affecting you, speak to someone you trust about the issues you’re having. If you notice that gaming is affecting your health, be it a physical health symptom or mood swings and low moods, speak to a professional – there is a lot of free and confidential support out there around gaming and your health.
If you need support
You should always tell someone about the things you’re worried about. You can tell a friend, parent, guardian, teacher, or another trusted adult. If you're struggling with your mental health, going to your GP can be a good place to start to find help. Your GP can let you know what support is available to you, suggest different types of treatment and offer regular check-ups to see how you’re doing.
If you’re in need of in-the-moment support you can contact Childline, where you can speak to a counsellor. Their lines are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
There are more links to helpful organisations on the BBC Bitesize Action Line page for young people.
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