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HEALTH FAMILY PROBLEMS RELATIONSHIPS EDUCATION & CAREER "I have a small doctor's practice, I live modestly and spend a lot of time looking after my elderly mother. That isn't a problem because I am divorced and my ex-wife had custody of our only child. Recently I've been offered a great opportunity to work in a medical centre in Australia. It is long term contract and the money is good. Unfortunately my mother doesn't want me to leave Bulgaria and obviously a move like this means that I would not be able to see my young daughter so frequently. This situation is causing me much confusion. I feel very guilty at the thought of leaving my mother and daughter behind, but at the same time I see this as a great career opportunity. Do you have any suggestions?" Mladen Stefanov, Bulgaria. Suzy Hammond, author of advice books... *The question is who you're being loyal to and why. Sacrificing your life for both children and parents is very complicated. Children may not be grateful and will eventually grow up and leave their parents, similarly, parents are the ones that look after you but there comes a point when an individual must live his own life. * Think about is what you are going to feel worse about: letting this opportunity slip by, or leaving your family? *Talk to both of them, and remember that even if you move thousands of miles away, that does not mean that you are cut off from your family. Today you can email, use digital technology like web cams and digital cameras, telephone, and of course you can always visit. *Also it's very important to know is that nothing is irrevocable, you can always go back to Bulgaria if you are unhappy and feel guilty. *Whatever decision you do make, you should settle on it, and stick with it. It is not good to beat yourself up by thinking you did the wrong thing and feeling guilty about it. Consider carefully all the positive and negative aspects, then decide, and stick to it. Remember you are responsible for your own life, just as others are responsible for theirs. The What's the Problem? website is providing general information only. It should not be treated as a substitute for the medical advice of your own doctor or any other health care professional. The BBC is not responsible or liable for any diagnosis made by a user based on the content of the What's the Problem? website. Always consult your own GP if you're in any way concerned about your health.		FURTHER INFORMATION   WHAT IS A WEB CAM? Web-Cams are digital cameras that take pictures at regular intervals and place those pictures online when they're taken. Examples of web cams include real-time pictures of the Statue of Liberty in America, someone's fish tank , an office or living room or even a well missed family member; pretty much anything you can point a digital video camera at. Despite the fact that live, streaming pictures appear complicated and expensive to set up, web cams are actually much simpler than people think and the basic hardware and software that you need don’t cost that much    INTERNET LINKS See The World With Web Cam   How To Set Up a Web Cam   Advanced Web Cam Use   The BBC is not responsible for the content of external Internet sites