CAROLINE BIRD:What I want to talk about this morning, in this circus tent outside a big castle, is happiness.
CAROLINE BIRD:In relationships people go "Oh I just really want to make you happy" or "Why are you dumping me?" "I don’t know I'm just not happy, I want to be happy."
CAROLINE BIRD:Right? Or as I read in the paper yesterday Why are you kayaking off this 30 ft waterfall?
CAROLINE BIRD:"I dunno, It just makes me happy." Right, I want you to do one thing. Write, it might be a lie, but write "I am happy". That's all you need to do, "I am happy". Now I want you to cross out the word happy, because its rubbish.
CAROLINE BIRD:OK. And now I want you to replace the word happy with something that means happy, for instance… I am a golden pinball machine or I am a diamond toilet seat or I am a huge roast dinner or I am a paper bagfull of lights or I am a…
CAROLINE BIRD:What's your favourite thing in the world?
CAROLINE BIRD:I am, I am Pokémon. Is that your favourite thing in the world? In the WORLD? Oh my god!
CAROLINE BIRD:A lot of the time in school poetry is presented maybe as something that’s
CAROLINE BIRD:studious activity or something that you have to decipher like a crossword or something that belongs to dusty scholars on dusty shelves, in the past. So that’s perfect, I am a Dorito. I am a pizza with what on top? Pepperoni. Bubble bath, amazing. Tomatos? I am a shoe.
CAROLINE BIRD:A few more, a few more! Father Christmas, moo cow. Say eating hamburgers makes you happy, you wouldn’t say I…
CAROLINE BIRD:"I'm eating hamburger" you just say, "I am a massive hamburger". Do you understand? Yeah, cool. Because a lot of times especially in poetry people kind of think a bit like, it has to mature like cheese
CAROLINE BIRD:and you can't really be taken seriously until your 40 and you've got a beard. I am money in a bag feels like better than I am money, don't it?
CAROLINE BIRD:A bit like a sculptor you need the block of stone in order to carve something out of it, you know?
CAROLINE BIRD:So, you don’t want to be afraid of writing rubbish. Just get rid of the empty page just write whatever comes into your head you know?
CAROLINE BIRD:Chips to the power of two, yep it's all in the details.
CHILD #1:And ketchup.
CAROLINE BIRD:And is happy cows part of it or is that a second one?
CHILD #2:No, no, no–
CAROLINE BIRD:Oh of course! Oh of course I'm sorry I'm sorry, of course, I'm an idiot. Nothing is right or wrong, you know?
CAROLINE BIRD:We kind of just wrote as many images as we could and then made a big poem out of it I am the annoying spot on someone else's nose. It was electrifying it was really, really good. I am a Dorito.
CAROLINE BIRD:I am bubble wrap, I am music, I am mass destruction. I am pizza with peperoni, I am money in a bag.
CAROLINE BIRD:I'm a shoe.
STUDENTS LAUGH
CAROLINE BIRD:I'm a kite. I am the annoying spot on somebody else's nose.
STUDENTS LAUGH
CAROLINE BIRD:I am a red lava lamp, I am snowydays, I am George Clooney in a leather Italian suit.
CAROLINE BIRD:I am a Chipmunk. I am high pitched singing voices, I am a turtle, I am a piranha I am an empty house, thick with peace. I'm a strawberry, I'm a candy unicorn. I am a carrot!
CAROLINE BIRD:I am Spongebob, I am Pingu, I am Father Christmas. I am a plethora of tall mountains. I am a rubber duck, I am a Mexican moustache. I'm a…
CAROLINE BIRD:Lego man! I'm a moo cow! I AM THE TUNA THAT YOU FIND IN SANDWICHES!
STUDENTS LAUGHING
CAROLINE BIRD:That's you, I didn't write any of that!
Video summary
Caroline Bird published her first book of verse aged just fifteen.
In this energetic and entertaining workshop she challenges a group of thirty teenagers to create images and write lines inspired by the idea of 'happiness'.
Caroline assembles these lines into 'one massive poem' which she then performs – the sort of poetry which, as she points out, 'you can only write when you’re young.'
This clip is from the series How to Write.
Teacher Notes
Can be used to help students to explore an often neglected theme in literature.
Students are to be given a selection of texts, poetry anthologies, books, or taken to a library.
They need to search for three moments of genuine happiness in any of the literature they come across.
This will perhaps be harder than they think. What do students observe about happiness as a theme?
Is the happiness caught in literature always true and pure happiness, or is there always another side to things?
What conclusions can students draw about this rather philosophical word?
Students could experiment with using a happy tone to read out poems or pieces of literature they have already studied and see if the reading sheds any new light on the text.
This clip is relevant for teaching English Literature at KS3 in England, Wales and Northern Ireland, and 3rd and 4th Level in Scotland.
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