Keep your nose out, Seaman!

Buster told newspaper Abendzeitung: "A psychologist will not be able to help Kahn. He has just got too many hormones."

The Czech star added: "What he needs is sex. Maybe he should try passive sex like Ronaldo. That would definitely calm him down."

Ronaldo gave a TV interview earlier this month saying he and his wife enjoyed a bit of how's your father before every game he played.

When Kahn heard that a porn star was trying to give him some advice, he reportedly said it was none of David Seaman's business.

Bolton's double trouble

Many teams go through lean spells.

But few could match Bolton's (under) achievements on Wednesday - after they lost twice in one day.

Sam Allardyce named a side of reserves to play Bury at the Reebok in the Worthington Cup, claiming they were "bursting with opportunity".

Sam gets that double sinking feeling

They promptly lost 1-0 as defender Bernard Mendy did not so much burst as fall to pieces, taking his "opportunity" by turning the ball into his own net.

Meanwhile those Bolton players not good enough to be picked for the might of Bury - the reserve reserves, presumably - were playing the Kenyan national team, and losing 4-3.

A new chant of "Can we play you every day?" may soon be heard at the Reebok...