England hit back with three late wickets after being bowled out for 203 by South Africa on the first day of the second Test at Headingley.

Morne Morkel and Dale Steyn each took four wickets while Kevin Pietersen top-scored with a cameo knock of 45.

Andrew Flintoff, in his first Test for 18 months, made 17 at number seven.

But James Anderson took two wickets, while Flintoff had skipper Graeme Smith (44) caught at first slip to leave the tourists 101-3 at close of play.

606: DEBATE Discuss the match on 606

By Tom Fordyce

CLOSE OF PLAY

1837: SA 101-3
That's our lot - Amla on 18, Prince on 10, but this one could run and run. Applause for your emails all day long - you'll have Mitch's warm hands to guide you along on Saturday. Be interesting to hear Skipper Vaughan's thoughts on the catch/non-catch...

1831: SA 92-3
England's grumble is this: Amla was gone, halfway to the hutch, and coach Micky Arthur and Graeme Smith sent him back. The third umpire then ruled on the catch, which isn't supposed to happen under the playing conditions. Having said that, didn't the same thing go on with KP against India at Lord's last summer?

From Ben Renshaw: "A special delivery from Il Postino will settle these uncertain times."

1824: SA 87-3
Vaughan's fuming - he's chuntering away to Bowden with a look of fury across his chops. Anderson crashes one into Prince's pads and it looks plumb, but for some reason Jimmy barely appeals. Replays show it was cleaning up middle. My goodness.

From Neil on the Isle of Man, TMS inbox: "Is it time for an 'UnWicket' Icon after today's excitement?"

1818: SA 82-3
The scoreboard was showing 76-4 - England were celebrating. Apologies for giving you a heart attack, but Amla looked dead and buried there. There's then a huge bellow as Amla gets something on one down leg-side, but Umpire Bowden calls it a no-ball. It's all happening.

1814: WICKET - NO IT'S NOT - SA 76-3
Brilliant diving catch from Vaughan running in from mid-off as Amla spoons a Fred lifter back down the pitch - but is Amla coming back? South Africa are saying that the ball bounced - the third umpire can't decide, so Amla is walking back to the middle. England are furious - Vaughan is convinced he caught it. Amla was virtually on the boundary rope before Graeme Smith came running down the pavilion steps to send him back.

1810: WICKET - Kallis b Anderson 4, SA 76-3

1806: SA 70-2
Fred's dander is fully up now. As a man dressed as Scooby-Doo pours lager through his costume's eye-hole and into his mouth, Fred thunders two at Kallis's chest and follows through with snorting menace.

1800: SA 70-2
Nice greeting for new-man Kallis from Jimmy - a spicy in-seamer which cracks Zhaark square on the flapjacks. Real eye-waterer, that one, and England are hunting another one before the close.

1756: WICKET - Smith c Strauss b Flintoff 44, SA 69-2

1752: SA 68-1
Amla thrashes a wide one through point for a fast-hands four. Whinges from the England players about the state of the ball, and Umpire Bowden pulls out the metal handcuffs to see what shape we're in.

From Mel in Oxfordshire, TMS inbox: "Still waiting for the Postman to stamp his authority on the match."

1747: SA 63-1
Anderson comes round the wicket and serves one right into the slot for Smith, who flips him away through midwicket for another four. Still a minimum of 18 overs left in the day.

1741: SA 57-1
Quick single to Skipper Smith before Amla digs in for the night.

From Ian Hayley, TMS inbox: "There's no way England will get another 7 wickets tonight, no way I'll get a chilli cooked for me tonight with several beers, and no way that my wife will come home from work with a hot friend of hers saying shall we all get in the hot tub later. Come on you reverse mockers - please..."

1736: SA 56-1
Right said Fred, both of us together, one each end and steady as we go. With Jimmy taking a breather out in the deep, Flintoff bangs one in short against new batsmam Amla and catches him flush on the lid. The ball flies past Tiny Tim Ambrose and down to the fence for four byes. Ouch.

1727: WICKET - McKenzie c Flintoff b Anderson 15, SA 51-1

From Harry Rousham, TMS inbox: "I'd say Second Class is pushing it for the Postman. Time to 'return to sender' me thinks."

1723: SA 47-0
Lovely blue skies overhead now. Wonder if I can put the reverse mockers on England by stating that there's no way they'll get a wicket tonight.

From Andy Lord in Hampshire, TMS inbox: "Pattinson didn't bag his first wicket in a jiffy then?"

1720: SA 47-0
Jimmy to have another joust. There's been less movement out there than in a top-class game of sleeping lions.

From Alice Wightman, TMS inbox: "Colin Charvis and I once had a full blown conversation in the middle of a busy Cardiff shopping street when he mistakenly confused me with 'Ed', the shop assistant who had recently sold him his mobile phone. Was too scared to correct him."

1713: SA 46-0
Smith is chomping away on a lump of gum, trying to keep the grin off his chops. It's all gone right for him today, ever since he won that toss all those hours ago. He flicks a full Fred one round the corner for two. If you've any idea where England might get a wicket from, chuck me an email and I'll try to get a message out to Vaughan.

From Craig in Chesterfield, TMS inbox: "I have been playing most of the summer in my back garden with my 5 year old son. I have taken his wicket at least twice a day for the last 11 weekends. Could you pass my phone number on to the selectors, although I am busy next weekend at a children's party."

1707: SA 44-0
A heavy sense of dread in the air now. Blocker McKenzie steps back and pulls a short nothing of a ball from Malfoy between midwicket and mid-on for four. A man in a canary suit sips a pint of lager with beaky anxiety.

From Dawid Burger, TMS inbox: "Here in South Africa we have the quota system when selecting teams to right the wrongs of the past. Is Pattinson part of your program representing ex-colonies?"

1702: SA 39-0
Maiden from Fred, but that's mainly because Blocker McKenzie is as obsessed with survival as Bear Grylls.

From Malcolm, TMS inbox: "The odd 1st class delivery from The Postman but all in all not a great package."

1658: SA 39-0
Malfoy Broad is summoned into the attack, and he shows all the menace of a sleeping Teletubby. Smith leans back and glides him away for three simple fours to the third man fence. I know it's early doors, but things look dicey for England here. On a brighter note, a man in a Matthew Hoggard wig sprints onto the pitch and canters around happily before being floored by a steward with the dirtiest sliding tackle you'll ever see. Hold on - is it the real Matthew Hoggard?

1652: SA 27-0
Let the bells ring out - it's Fred o'clock. There's no Botham v NZ in 1986-style immediate impact, but let's give the big unit an over or two. McKenzie leaves three outside off before clipping a leg-stump full-bunger through midwicket for four. Cheers die on beer-flecked lips.

From Bruce in Bermuda, TMS inbox: "Is Postman Pattinson the reincarnation of Martin McCague?"

1648: SA 27-0
The wobbles spread to the other end now, Jim being driven straight and then pulled square by the glinting-eyed Smith. There's only man who can make the breakthrough, surely - and he's warming up at second slip...

From Sam Confrey, TMS inbox: "Re: David Yems at 15:51, I used to play rugby with said "Strawberry Blond" and can confirm Kenny Logan and Charlie Hodgson similarities. I think he's added Daniel Bedingfield in himself to be more popular with girls though."

1644: SA 19-0
Hmmm. This isn't looking great for the Aussie roofer - he drops short and is crashed square with ease by Smith, and when he tries to correct he goes too full and is sent to the long-off fence at rapid pace. Ominous.

1640: SA 10-0
As you were from Jim - pacey line outside off, although the ball is doing less than Marie Antoinette at the mo.

1635: SA 9-0
Ostentatious applause from Vaughan as Postman gets trampoline lift from outside off to leave Smith fencing. He then pitches one up at half-pace and is slammed back past his boot-laces for a don't-chase four.

From Spencer Brown, TMS inbox: "The Postman will be looking to stamp his authority on the game with these deliveries."

1631: SA 4-0
On the money like Adam Smith from Anderson, just shy of a length and zipping up with decent ping off the pitch. Fred's got his hands on his knees a la Beefy B at secocnd slip.

1628: SA 3-0
The Postman will come knocking from the other end. His first hits Blocker on the pads but is heading legwards, and his second is clipped away from the same region for one. Smith gets off the quacker with a scamper to cover, and it's an unremarkable first over in Test cricket for the new boy. Interesting quote from Pattinson's old man John for you: "He's Australian, Darren. He is. It's a chance to play international cricket. In all honesty he just wanted a chance to play."

1622: SA 1-0
Jimmy A it is, with three slips and a gully in. Blocker McKenzie squirts one away off his pads for a single before Jim shapes one past Skipper Smith's prod. Steady.

1618: Guess what - the sun's come out at Headingley. Ideal. Reckon Skipper Vaughan will give Postman Pattinson the cherry?

ENGLAND INNINGS

1600: WICKET - Pattinson c Boucher b Steyn 8, Eng 203 all out

1558: Eng 203-9
A touchingly Harmisonesque moment from Morkel, spraying a rapid one through second slip for four byes to bring up England's 200. Well-refreshed cheers ring out around the wintry stands.

1551: Eng 198-9
To chants of "Who are ya?" from the Western Terrace, Postman pushes at a full one and sprints a two through cover. Born to play Test cricket, this lad.

From a "strawberry blond" David Yems, TMS inbox: "Speaking of gingerism and lookalikes, I was out last weekend and was told I looked like Kenny Logan, Charlie Hodgson and Daniel Bedingfield - if they were ginger. How my heart sank..."

1546: Eng 195-9
Why isn't Pattinson opening the batting? He flails with vim at an attempted yorker and edges the ball at chest height through the only gap in the off-side cordon for four to third man fence, and follows it up with a frantic jab at a shorter one which picks him up two to leg. Tea delayed so the inevitable end isn't.

From Brian Nash, TMS inbox: "Oh dear. This is making an already dull accounting afternoon even more depressing. I'll have a fiver on us all out for less than 200, South Africa coming in and getting 600-3 declared and skittling us back out for less than 100. All over by Sunday."

1542: Eng 188-9
Here we go - New-Boy/Pogo/Sir Les/Postman Pattinson jogs in for his Test dayboo. Jimmy's on strike after Monty fell to the last ball of the previous Mornover, and he pushes through point for two off the bag peg. Morkel licks his lips as he lines Pattinson up in his sights.

From Tim Miller, TMS inbox: "VoldeMork" (Carol, 1508)? What next - 'Harry Potter and the Corridor of Uncertainty'?"

1536: WICKET - Panesar c De Villiers b Morkel 0, Eng 186-9

1533: Eng 185-8
With joy in my heart I type the words "no wickets have fallen". Jimmy Anderson jabs down in panicked fashion at a Steyn swinger and picks up four to square leg. He then pokes at a full one and is a catfish's whisker away from a snick behind.

From Spencer Brown, TMS inbox: "Staying with the Harry Potter theme, does anybody else notice a slight resemblance between Paul Collingwood and Ron Weasley?"

Blatant gingerism, Spencer. Who else do you think Colly looks like? Mick Hucknall? Geri Halliwell?

1526: WICKET - Broad c De Villiers b Morkel 17, Eng 181-8

1520: WICKET - Flintoff c Boucher b Steyn 17, Eng 177-7

1518: Eng 177-6
More flickaway from Broad, popping Morkel into the vacant spaces in the leg side for a brace of scamperers. Fred's shirt seems to have 'CT' on the sleeve - I think he's wearing Chris Tremlett's shirt. So it's not all bad news for Tremlett - he might have been overlooked for the Aussie roofer, but at least his shirt is getting a game.

From Paul in Burnley, TMS inbox: "Are England just trying to score as many runs and lose as many wickets as quikcly as possible in order to bowl at SA today whilst conditions favour the bowlers? If they are, they're my kind of tactics. Kevin Keegan would be proud."

1513: Eng 173-6
Time for another Steyn spell. There's a short leg in for Malfoy but he picks up a hip-crusher from Dangerous and flicks it away like a lanky Lara for a three-bounce four to the square leg boundary boards. Steyn then over-corrects and is flayed over third slip for another four before almost snaking an in-dipper between pad and Broad blade.

1508: Eng 160-6
Morkel bangs 'em in outside off and Fred shoulders arms extravagantly. Still grey and blustery overhead. A man in a Viking outfit tugs his beard a little further up his face.

From Carole in Maidenhead, TMS inbox: "Is that He Who Must Not Be Named - VoldeMork - bowling to Malfoy?"

1503: Eng 159-6
Papa Broad had to enjoy that one - Kallis tries to angle one across Malfoy and is drilled to the cover fence. Odds on England making the 200?

1458: Eng 154-6
Fred stands tall at the crease, the peak of his lid low over his eyes as always. With three slips and two gullies in he slashes at Morkel and picks up a streaky four over the leaping fielders. Stuart Broad at the other end, his old man Chris watching on in a farmeresque tweed jacket up in the stands.

1452: WICKET - Bell b Kallis 31, Eng 150-6

By Mark Mitchener

1449: Eng 146-5
Change of bowling as Morkel replaces Ntini, Flintoff fences at a very wide one but can't reach it and umpire Bowden signals a wide. But Fred rolls back the years with a powerful cut for four through the wide open spaces of the covers (as the slip cordon is packed). Another streaky four just beats the fielder to the third man boundary. And time for Tom to assess the damage of the last hour...

"Simon Jones, the best reverse-swing bowler in England, must be wondering what he's ever done to Geoff Miller. Maybe Geoff needs his roof done on the cheap?"
Edward Cassels in the TMS inbox

1441: Eng 137-5
As Aggers and Vic on TMS compare notes on their experiences with the Headingley sniffer-dogs on their way into the ground today, Bell beautifully punches Kallis back past the stumps for four, and holds the pose in case any photographers missed it. He nudges a couple to leg, and then frantically waves to the dressing-room, indicating he may need a new helmet. A drinks break is taken.

"My friend and I went to the Worcester v Notts game the other night. As she and I were finding our way round the boundary to get a drink from the bar, we were wolf-whistled by one of the Notts players fielding on the boundary. I don't know if was me or Jane, or if we should sue, but I must say we were both (pleasantly) shocked! Anyone else had some memorable or different interaction with any players at cricket matches?"
Gina in Gloucestershire in the TMS inbox

1437: Eng 131-5
A streaky start to Flintoff's innings as he fences at one, chest height, and it sails past gully for four. A second gully might well have pouched him, but at least he's off the mark. No chances are taken with the rest of the over.

"I've also just had a quick look at the photos for Day 1. Can anyone recall a captain tossing the coin in a more extravagant way then Michael Vaughan? The technique is superb... high elbow, excellent weight transfer with his head over his front foot..."
David in Halifax in the TMS inbox

1433: Eng 127-5
Jacques Kallis replaces Steyn in the attack, and by the look of him, it looks like he's been having a few lunches of the type Vic Marks has just had. Bell lets a couple go by outside off stump, then gets up on his toes to steer a four through point.

"I wonder if Shah, Ramprakash, Simon Jones et al are considering forming their own ICL-inspired rebel Test XI?"
David, at work in Germany, in the TMS inbox

1429: Eng 123-5
Flintoff literally sprints out of the pavilion, and is at the wicket before Ambrose has crossed the boundary rope. To huge cheers, he takes guard and defends his first ball.

"Woke up at 3am to watch the game out here in California on my computer. Being a cricket fan in Southern California is a depressingly lonely existence. Still, South Africa tearing through your upper order has made it all worthwhile"
Marc Kets in the TMS inbox

1423: Eng 121-4
Bell nudges Steyn for a single to square leg, then Ambrose is beaten by one just outside his proffered bat. He then exhibits what Vic on TMS calls a "short man's shot", helping a short ball to the mid-wicket boundary - more of a pull than a hook. And a clubbed drive down past mid-off brings three more, and takes his score to 11.

"Owais Shah must be thinking "what the hell do I have to do to get into this shambolic line-up?'"
Adam Flanagan in the TMS inbox

1417: Eng 113-4
Ambrose is taking it in singles at the moment, but probably won't mind. Bell thinks about pulling a short ball, but decides it's too wide outside off stump and lets it go. He then knocks his erstwhile Warwickshire team-mate Ntini again for a single to pinch the strike.

1413: Eng 111-4
Vic Marks returns to the TMS box, speaking fondly of a steak and ale pie he had at lunch. Ambrose weaves away from a Steyn bouncer, then tips-and-runs another single to bring up Nelson.

"How does Vaughan get in the side any more, he can't bat to save his life and has the body of a 55-year-old! The nickname 'past it' comes to mind"
Mark from Essex in the TMS inbox

1409: Eng 110-4
Henry Blofeld on TMS compares Morne Morkel at mid-on to "a mildly animated lamp-post" as he fields a dot ball from Ambrose. Tiny Tim doubles his score with a single to leg, while Paul Harris at mid-off grasps a huge handful of sawdust to fill a hole in Ntini's delivery stride.

"With reference to Matt Jones' 1237 post - Paul Harris was born in Zimbabwe, not South Africa. So no"
Tim Hutchings in the TMS inbox

1405: Eng 109-4
It might be cruel to suggest we're into the tail here, but a few people think Tim Ambrose may be a place or two too high at number six. He's off the mark after pushing a single into the covers. Bell steers a couple past mid-on, and the pursuing Amla loses his hat as the ball is retrieved.

Meanwhile, on the TMS Blog, former England skipper Graham Gooch has had his say on the shock selection of Darren Pattinson - and he promises to give national selector Geoff Miller a grilling on the subject on BBC Radio 5 Live this afternoon.
TMS Blog: Graham Gooch on Pattinson's selection

1359: Eng 102-3
As if to defy his old mucker Graeme Smith to set a field to him, Pietersen now attacks the off side, cracking Ntini through extra cover for another three. It doesn't get better for Ntini with Bell on strike, as his former Warwickshire colleague straight-drives between the bowler and mid-on for four which brings up three figures for England.

1354: Eng 95-3
TMS scorer Bill Frindall reveals that pre-Pattinson, there has never been a Test cricketer born in Grimsby (or who has died there) as a Bell single brings Pietersen on strike, and he's having a bit of a dash here. He forces another one from Steyn off the stumps past mid-on for three.

"Just browsing through the Day 1 photos so far. Who let the schoolboy in the England replica kit on to the square during the toss? The stewards have clearly taken their eye off the ball"
Ian in the TMS inbox
[I think they have a football-style mascot for each Test - MM]

1349: Eng 91-3
Bell cover-drives Ntini for three, then KP whacks one off his legs through mid-wicket for four. The Hampshire man then whips another one from well outside off stump, again through the mid-wicket region, and that's four fours since lunch. Tom gave me the impression that this was a Test match, but I could have been forgiven for thinking I'd stumbled into a Twenty20 game (barring the players wearing whites and not one-day PJs).

1345: Eng 80-3
Steyn takes the first over after lunch at the Kirkstall Lane End, and his first ball bangs into KP's right thigh. Unless he wears thigh pads on both legs (and who does, anyway?), he'll have a bruise there. But when Steyn drops one in short and wide, KP gets the scoreboard going with a cut for four through the covers. An elegant straight-drive past the bowler brings another four. Another flashing cut brings two to third man and CMJ on TMS berates Neil McKenzie, who was an injury doubt with a groin problem, with an entirely unnecessary dive to pick the ball up.

1338: Right, with Tom taking a breather, I'm back in the chair - and find Aggers talking about how "the last of England's recognised batsmen" are at the crease. With only three wickets down. Ooer.

By Tom Fordyce

LUNCH INTERVAL

1301: Eng 70-3
Smith calls Ntini back on for a token joust before the sandwiches. New-man Bell blinks back down the track and cracks a full one through cover with dreamy timing.

That's the session dusted - thrills 'n' spills all over, not least the spill from De Villiers that he claimed as a clean 'un. Let's get some sustenance down us and reconvene in 40.

NB for those with access to audio, Matthew Hoggard's on TMS this lunchtime. Wonder what he thinks about being overlooked in favour of a 29-year-old Australian roofer.

From Adam Binks, TMS inbox: "A quick point for Sam at 1212. Sam if you are so concerned with brevity and being delivered only the information you require(the scores and action points) perhaps you should review your own text, I just wasted a second of my life reading 'perfectly adequately named Pattinson' when surely adequately or perfectly would have been sufficient."

From Paul Sewell, TMS inbox: "I wish people would stop complaining about people complaining about not concentrating on the cricket and just concentrate on complaining about not concentrating on the cricket."

1256: Eng 66-3
Nervous pre-lunch times, these. Zhaark bends one past KP's lunging outside edge after Steyn slips at mid-on and lets a beefy drive slide through his legs for four. KP then leaves a ball which snakes back at his off-peg and misses the timbers by the width of this full-stop.

From Doug, TMS inbox: "Perhaps you could create a handbag graphic for when you receive a petty complaint that you aren't concentrating on the cricket?"

1250: WICKET - Strauss c Boucher b Morkel 27, Eng 62-3

1247: Eng 57-2
More of the same from Zhaark, with a little chat for KP as he trundles down the track in his follow-through. KP beams happily as the chirp fires up from slips and 'keeper.

1242: Eng 57-2
Dear oh dear - I'm not a man for ranting, but that is an utter disgrace. Strauss edges Morkel to AB de Villiers at second slip, the fielder dives forward and rolls over celebrating the catch. The entire South African cordon leap around claiming the wicket, but Strauss stands his ground - and rightly so, because De Villiers not only dropped the ball but then pushed it along the turf before turning his palm upwards and pretending he'd taken it cleanly. Uproar around the ground when the replay is shown on the giant screen. Trouble...

1237: Eng 56-2
If you ever need a man to turn up the dullness dial, Zhaark's your man. With the heavy menace of a bulldozer, he snuffs the fun out of the over as Smith glowers from slip. From Matt Jones, TMS: "Is this the first time all on-field players (from both sides) were born in the same country?"

1231: Eng 55-2
The wet outfield is leaving the ball a little slippery, and Mindy is struggling with the sogginess. He slings one down leg and is pulled away happily by Strauss, and when he tries a fuller one he's driven back down the ground to roars from the chilly masses.

From Rachel ("very cheerful because it's Friday"), in Portsmouth, TMS inbox: "Re: 12:12 I don't think there is any need to be grumpy just because he wasn't allowed to join in. Maybe he'll cheer up with a nick name of his own. How about Spam in Hamchester? Or perhaps just 'spoilsport' would do?"

1225: Eng 48-2
Smith hauls Dangerous from the attack and turns to Zhaark Kallis. The Big Unit bangs in four leave-alones and KP stays watchful. Rain still in the air, as Strauss is constantly reminding the umpos.

From Neil, TMS inbox: "To Sam in Manchester (1212): The bits of text with the time, usually followed by the word WICKET, describe the action on the field. Don't spoil the enjoyment of us desk jockeys."

1225: Eng 48-2
It's actually raining quite heavily, but Bowden and Harper aren't stupid - they're not going to sack off this spiciness unless it starts snowing. Four slips and a gully in for Strauss as Mindy strides in, and as he strains for a yorker he over-pitches and is creamed square for Strauss's second four. His final ball zings back in from outside off and nearly cleans Strauss up as he hauls his blade away late and gets an inside-edge just past his timbers.

1219: Eng 41-2
Dangerous Dale sprints in to KP. Here we go... and there goes the ball, through midwicket at about 500mph. What a shot to get off the mark. Steyn grimaces and comes back in with steam sizzling from his ears, bangs in a bouncer - and is hooked high in the grandstand for a massive six. Joyous disbelief around Headingley. Steyn stares wordlessly at the grinning KP and then spits out a mouthful of stroppy bile. Who said batting was difficult out there?

1212: Eng 29-2
It's horrible out there now - Mindy's getting steepling bounce, and Strauss is hopping like a nervous flea. KP at the other end - but is that rain in the air?

From Sam in Manchester, TMS inbox: "Here's an idea, lets forget about inventing nick names for the perfectly adequately named Pattinson, and instead lets describe what's actually happening on the field of play."

1205: WICKET - Vaughan c Smith b Steyn 0, Eng 27-2

From Scott Hamilton, TMS inbox: "I used to do a bit of roofing when I was younger. Granted it was Lewisham and not Oz but is there any chance of a game at Edgbaston in the next Test?"

1157: WICKET - Cook c Boucher b Morkel 18, Eng 26-1

From Stu in London, TMS inbox: "Whenever you say Pattison, I can't help but think 'Yes Mrs' from the famed Harry Enfield sketch Kevin and Perry."

1155: Eng 26-0
In the crowd, a man dressed as a matador chats amiably with a man in a bull costume. The bull pats the matador's burgeoning belly and the pair clink glasses before laughing and shaking their heads. Flick off the hips from Cookie as Steyn strays.

1150: Eng 23-0
Smith tells Ntini to take a blow - looks like Morne Morkel to have a bounce instead. Sure enough, Mindy finds lift from the off, and Strauss glances round anxiously as a thick edge bounces just shy of gully. Maiden. Very much a day for hip-flasks out there at the moment - or hot Ribenas for the hip-flaskers of tomorrow.

From Will, TMS inbox: "Re: Nicknames for Pattinson. Why not go with what the England side will no doubt be calling him: 'Oi, mate!'?"

1145: Eng 23-0
Vicious in-jagger from Steyn, rapping Cook on the front peg as the ball snags in from off-stump. Umpire Billy B keeps his crooked finger to himself.

From Dr T.V. Liew, Addenbrookes Hospital, TMS inbox: "Re nickname for Pattinson - I can't be the first, but it's got to be 'Sir Les'."

1141: Eng 23-0
Squeakiness from Cook again - he goes all bottom-hand on a drive off Ntini and gets lucky as the ball fizzes past a close-in cover at snaggable height. Graeme Smith, buried in a long-sleeve jumper, additional sleeveless number, long-sleeved shirt, vest and sleeping bag*, stares at the sky and winces like a man who's just dislodged a filling.

(*not all of this sentence is factually correct)

1137: Eng 20-0
Whoosh - Dangerous Dale zips one between Cookie's blade and front peg. Close. He then strays onto the left-handers' legs and is touched away for easy singles.

From Marc Allsop, TMS inbox: "I would like to go for Pogo Pattinson in deference to the former Grange Hill legend."

1133: Eng 17-0
No sign yet that Macca has re-found the menace that went missing at Lord's. He plops three deliveries well wide of Strauss's off-peg, decides to comes a little closer and gets crashed away square for a lovely cut four.

From Dominic Woodford, TMS inbox: "If we're going to continue this policy of selecting players for England who have played for/lived in Australia and South Africa, can we at least aim to get the good ones like Ricky Ponting and Brett Lee in the England team?"

1128: Eng 13-0
Dangerous Dale tries to land a short one of Cook's nose and is swung away effortlessly for a rapid four to the deep square leg boundary. Floor now open for possible nicknames for New-Boy Pattinson.

First email of the day to have made it through, from Stewart Clifton: "Pattinson played league cricket for us at Townville (Castleford) in the Central Yorkshire League last year. Looked a good player but went home crocked after 4 weeks, so sounds like he'll fit perfectly into the England set up."

1125: Eng 9-0
Tickle from Cook off Macca, and there's just a single off the over. Sawdust all over the place on the outfield, and a couple of glum-faced men in woolly hats sip gingerly at cold lagers.

1121: Eng 8-0
CMJ on TMS wonders whether Pattinson is the first "Darren" to have played for England, which is one in the eye for the Goughmeister if nothing else. Steyn swings one down the leg side which Strauss doesn't play at, and one past his outside edge to which he shoulders arms. Maiden.

1116: Eng 8-0
First glimpse of Fred on the England balcony as Macca Ntini zips in to Cookie. The old stager drops short and is cut away by the doe-eyed opener for an uppish four to the fence. Decent amount of bounce in the track so far - looks like a tough 'un to bat on.

1110: Eng 2-0
Dangerous Dale Steyn is handed the cherry by Skipper Smith, and there's three slips and a gully in for Strauss. With grey skies overhead, Dangerous pitches 'em up and is driven straight for a casual two. Few technical issues with emails at the mo - get your chat lined up for about 1130 and the problems should be unglitched by then.

1100: Covers are off again - we'll be underway shortly. Now then - apparently Pattinson's not the best with a bat in his hand, so he's likely to come in at 11. Tiny Tim Ambrose will bat at six, with Fred at seven. Anyone else feeling a touch scared?

1050: This being cricket, all the excitement is put on hold as a chilly shower sweeps across the ground. The covers are hurried on, although it looks like a brief delay. Yup - the rain's heading off already.

1042: News from the toss: Graeme Smith calls correctly once again, and he'll have a bowl. Good shout from Skipper; bad news for England, you'd have to think...

1040: Cloudy at Headingley. with swing in the air - so do England turn to home-town hero Matthew Hoggard, the in-form Simon Jones or even Steve Harmison? Nope - they go for a bloke who was working as a roof-tiler in Australia two years ago.

1031: After a world record six Tests unchanged, England are turned upside down - Siders ruled out through injury to be replaced by a 29-year-old who thought he was taking his kids to Alton Towers today, and Colly given the heave-ho in favour of the Returning Fred.

1026: Darren Pattinson - could this be the least expected England selection since Joey Benjamin?

1025: What? Who?