By Chris Charles BBC Sport Online (he's the mug on the right)

Watch Bobby George tell it like it is (Broadband)

Watch Bobby George tell it like it is (modem)

It's not every day you come face to face with a sporting legend, let alone get to pick up a few tips from them.

But that's exactly what happened when I was summoned to George Hall - home of the great Bobby George - for a quick game of arrers.

Whoever thought darts was a poor man's sport should take a look at the house Bobby built and think again.

Set in 12 acres of sprawling woodland, including a fishing lake stocked with trout, George Hall is a stately home crammed with boys' toys.

Bobby's Lord of the Manor at George Hall

You've got the full-sized snooker table, fully-equipped bar and, of course, a matchplay dartboard.

Ah yes, the darts - the true purpose of this trip out to the Essex countryside.

Now I wouldn't say I'm the world's worst arrow slinger, but it's fair to say Phil Taylor's not quaking in his boots just yet.

In fact, after Bobby's harsh-but-fair assessment of my action, I'd be hard pressed to give Phil Mitchell a game.

"It's a bit tartish really," he reasoned.

Don't hold back, will you Bob - just give it to me straight.

"You're too jerky, you must go forward and follow through - a little bit more finesse."

Bish, bash bosh

Trying to take everything on board, I agreed to a game of 501, providing Bobby promised to treat me gently.

I needn't have worried. A few throws in and I'd hit the 20 a couple of times (without troubling the treble admittedly) and looked to be cruising to a memorable victory.

Then Bobby took the blindfold off. Thirty seconds later - bish, bash, bosh and I was toast.

"I don't think you'll make a very good darts player," he grinned as I prepared my map and compass ready for the hike up the driveway.

Fancy a game of 501?

"In fact, I'm going to give you some toy ears to wear when you go to the pub, because you're a true Mickey Mouse player!"

And there's me thinking I could have been a contender.

Still, at least after an hour or two in the company of King George I can talk a good game. In fact I'm cushty wushty.