Peter Withe - those were the days

Secondly, if I accuse the West Midlands of being a football wasteland - which is a reasonable accusation I think - I'm not saying the North East is a football hotbed.

You seem to think that if I accuse your area of being crap, which it is, I'm saying my area's brilliant, which it isn't.

I just said it's a football wasteland and you've won nowt there since the days of Tony Barton, when Peter Withe scored with yet another part of his anatomy that wasn't his foot.

And Cov fans can keep quiet as well, because 1987 didn't really happen. Coventry didn't really win the FA Cup that year.

It was some strange blip, some clouds came across the moon and everything went a bit weird.

I'm not saying Boro are great either. We've won nowt - we're crap! But I'm a decent football fan and I don't delude myself.

It strikes me that the Villa fans spend a lot of time deluding themselves and they need a bit of psychotherapy so they can release the bats from their collective heads and look at football from a clear perspective.

You've won nowt for ages, you're not going to win owt for ages, so just get it into your heads and live with it.

OK, well if you don't take too kindly to being called a Geordie, wait until you hear this next comment!

Robbo would rather be a Geordie than a Cockney

It comes from Adam Spurrier in England and he says: I'm guessing the joker that wrote the article about Aston Villa is one of the pathetic Cockneys that think the Midlands is worthless.

Well personally I think you should all talk the Queen's English as you seem to be happy having her live in your awful, smoke-ridden city.

Right, well I think I'd take Geordie any day compared to Cockney, quite frankly. Cockney, my arse!

I do appreciate that normally anybody who slags off anywhere north of Watford is a snob from London, but it sounds to me that this lad is a bit of a snob himself.

You must be from down south yourself, son?

Me? Yeah, London born and bred.

Well, stick a whelk in the back of your mouth and shut up.

No seriously, I think this Lord Snooty should shut his trap, and I speak on behalf of Cockneys everywhere - who, apart from your good self, I despise.

Ooh! Right, so you're not a Geordie, you're not a Cockney, but you'd rather be a Cockney than a Geordie?

I am what I am, to quote a song from a musical which I shouldn't really know any songs from, because it's a girl's musical.

OK, well we'll leave the Villa alone for now. Next up is Hazel Johnson from the UK who is replying to your comments about the Southampton chairman.

Let's hear it for the hairdo

She says: Stuart Gray had half of last season and 10 games this season and could only manage wins against Arsenal and Manchester United's second team.

OK, he should never have been given the job in the first place but it's a bit much to expect the chairman to watch the team go down rather than look for another manager.

Anyway, Strachan's got a nice head of hair, so by your reckoning, Robbo, that should even things up.

Well, you're right to say the chairman shouldn't stand by and watch as his team goes down, but neither should he replace the existing manager with someone who has got experience of taking a team down.

I mean there's no point in replacing a manager with someone who's a bit more used to it.

The problem at Southampton is the chairman. The problem is that this stadium's burning a big hole in his pocket and I think he's getting a bit paranoid.

Getting rid of The Dell was a big mistake. It felt like the sort of ground you used to play on as kids, narrow and tight.

You felt as if there was another game going on next door, but I enjoyed the atmosphere, don't get me wrong.

Now they've gone to a bigger stadium. You know that old saying in football - 'They're a big side, but can they play on the bigger stage?'

Well, Southampton are doing that, but without selling any players, and frankly people like Marsden and Beattie can't cut it.

Well what do you think the answer is - move back to The Dell?

Yes I do. It only held 15,000 but everyone had a good time there.

When I think of The Dell, I always imagine people going along and still bringing their rattles.

It had that old-fashioned feel about it - people would say 'Up the Saints!' rather than swear. Lovely!

Indeed. OK, next one from Borris Blersa in New Zealand.

That's a terrific name! It's not a name, it's an anagram!

Answers on a postcard please. Anyway, Borris says: Hi Robbo. What do you reckon about that ref getting relagated then? (I think he's referring to Dermot Gallagher).

Do you think Keane should have been sent off?

Given the laws such as they are these days, I suppose he should have been sent off.

But I personally don't think he should have gone. I think it was a good decision by the ref.

Beckham was hacking away, but he shouldn't have been sent off either. Both of them were booked, which was the right thing to do.

Everyone else got on with the game, which for a Man U-Leeds game was quite well-behaved and both sets of fans went home reasonably happy with a point apiece.

Philip Don Corleoni?

Then along comes Referees Officer Philip Don, who is becoming more and more like Emperor Nero every day.

Well, that's your opinion, Robbo.

There must be some awful kind of arena where you go if you've dropped a few points on your refereeing peformance.

You get there and there's Philip Don with some leaves on his head and making gestures with his thumb to indicate you're going down.

It must be terrifying being a ref - not because of the fans but because of Philip Don!

I don't think his name was Don, I think he's just borrowed it because it's reminiscent of The Godfather. Philip Don Corleoni.

It must be terrifying for old Dermot. He's had some pretty nightmarish games, like all of them, but I think he did all right in that one.

Do you not think his failure to send Keane off might make other players think they've got carte blanche to push opponents around?

Well, yeah, but I'm one of these fans who used to go along partly to see players push each other for a bit. It was all part of the game.

If it didn't happen you thought: 'Well the game was all right, end to end stuff for 90 minutes, but nobody pushed anybody else so it was a bit dull really.

I mean it's not as if David Beckham and Robbie Keane are the hardest lads in the world is it?

If he'd sent both players off, both teams would have been furious and it would have descended into chaos, so well done, Dermot.

We'll see you in a few weeks when you've finished trailing around places like Stockport and disaster areas like that.

Well done, cheeky Hammers

Oh dear, you'd better brace yourselves for the fury of the Stockport fans next week!

Finally, Paddy Brice from England says: Changed your views on West Ham yet, Mr Crystal Ball?!!

Ah, bloody hell! All right, all right!

But you have to admit, after a 5-0 and a 7-1, anyone who said West Ham would be climbing up the table in no time at all and win their next three games would have needed a crystal ball pushing through their skull!

But well done West Ham, you cheeky Cockney boys.

Mind you, they have been lucky because they've been playing the cowardly custards of Chelsea and Ipswich, who have been terrible in the league.

I know they're the Tractor Boys, but they should try taking their wellies off before they start playing.

Well Paddy, that's almost an apology there from Robbo.

A grudging one - mind you, if they slip again I shall be delighted.

Before we go, what do you think of the two lads who are not going to India?

Tuffers would not have turned down India

I think it's a real shame. I can appreciate Caddick's reasons, because he's got a little bairn, but without him and Gough we are going to get thrashed.

I don't mind about Crofty, I don't know why he was going in the first place, and I rather suspect he didn't either.

But all the journalists and everybody else have to go over there to cover it, so I don't see why the players can't.

I agree, although this might open the door for your old mate Phil Tufnell.

Hopefully, yes. Tuffers wouldn't have turned that down - not India.

All right then mate, have a good week. Who have the Boro got this weekend?

I don't know. And do you know what, I don't care! They're playing terrible at the moment.

I know the feeling. It's tough being a QPR fan at the minute.

Ai, they're having a bit of a rollercoaster ride at the moment. One minute they're up, the next thy're down and the next they're...still down!

Cheers mate! Anyway, have a good weekend and we'll speak next week.

Ta ta, son.

Look out for Robbo's column on Tuesday.