 | Guide Entry: Planet Earth
by Becky
The most prominent feature of this planet is also the most stupid. The most common life form, humans, a) think video phones are a pretty neat idea! And b) do not realise they are just part of an experiment, and their so-called 'planet' is just a giant computer calculating the meaning of Life, the Universe and Everything, or The Ultimate Answer. They are convinced that they are the dominant life form (rather than mice) and this shows their extreme stupidity.
They are obsessed with the swiping of small flat plastic cards, which they call 'Credit' or 'Debit' cards, and cars. Cars have barely come on from cogs!
Their complete lack of respect is appalling. All of us know about the tragic Krikkit wars, yet they have created a game called Cricket! The aim is to knock the bails off the Wikkit! This proves that they barely know anything about 'outer space'.
They have only visited their tiny, dull, grey moon, and sent probes to Mars. They know nothing of the Babel Fish or the Improbability Drive. They would be shocked at the Restaurant at the End of the Universe's 'Meet the Meat' program. They do not understand that the meat, or creature, wants to be eaten. How primitive!
Creatures often comment on this experimental life form's primitiveness - that is if they accidentally land on this uncharted backwater - by saying (that's a nice way of putting it) "Go climb back up a tree!"
As this is such a boring planet, visiting is not recommended. Humans would not understand, as they are not accustomed to meeting Inter-Galactic Hitchhikers.
by Becky, age 10, from Reading
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