The husband has spiky hair, a matted beard with putrid pieces of mouldy liver lurking within it and a flatulence problem that could knock your socks off.

The wife is equally as bad with a screwed up face like a cat's rear, huge, bushy eyebrows and a temper that would make your nails curl.

'What on earth is she going on about', I hear you cry? Well who else could it be apart from Roald Dahl's most gruesome pair, 'The Twits'.

I first saw one of Dahl's stories performed on stage about 15 years ago when I was 'knee high to a grasshopper'.

A scary Mrs Twit.

I was so excited to see a story I had read so many times being brought to life on stage.

So as soon as I heard 'The Twits' was coming to The New Theatre, despite being somewhat older, I was off my settee before you could say 'Roly-Poly Bird' (I'll explain later).

For those of you who have never heard of this fantastic tale, let me give you a brief run-down of the plot.

The evil Mr and Mrs Twit (played brilliantly by Richard J Fletcher and Wendy Reed) want to make a quick buck so they decide to go to Africa and capture two monkeys called Mr and Mrs Mugglewump (Rachel Donovan and James Pearson).

The Twits create an amazing upside-down circus but in the process they treat The Mugglewumps terribly.

The monkey's only gleam of hope is the birds (Daniel Wexter and Jackie Drew) and the amazing Roly-Poly Bird (Daniel Crute).

The whole experience begins with a raucous entrance of shouting; drums and violins as the characters burst into the auditorium.

The flamboyant characters brought a sense of adventure to every child in place, with their audience participation and their hilarious slapstick humour.

It probably sounds like some sort of strange hallucination, but trust me it's highly entertaining and with constant narration by Matt Baker is very easy to follow.

So what are you waiting for? Either get down to the New theatre and see this disgusting duo for yourself or just read the book.

Even if you haven't got a child to take with you, don't worry, because as soon as you get down there you'll feel like a child again yourself.

By Cherry Jordan