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Ten documentaries on Five this autumn
In an exclusive, Ouch has secretly got hold of Five's schedule for this coming autumn, featuring many disability programmes of the type we've recently come to know and love. Rumour has it that Channel 4 and BBC TWO are exceedingly jealous as they had all their best ideas stolen by the young upstart of a TV network.

- The Boy With A Lump For A Face
- The Man With Toes For Fingers
- The Girl Who Cried Breast Milk
- The Boy With Wool For Hair
- The Woman Whose Breast Was Her Nose
- The Girl With The See-Through Stomach
- The Boy Who Gave Birth To His Father
- The Man Who Weed Fanta
- The Transsexual With The Inside-Out Mouth
- The Boy With A Hole For An Arse
Their strapline next season is said to be:
"If you like your disability EXTREME, then watch Five".
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