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Ellie
Length:2.32 mins
Date: March 2004
Location:Leicester | | | | | |  Watch this video
Watch Ellie's Mother Without Children video 56K
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| |  | | | | Childless
For someone who has suffered 14 miscarriages, an ectopic pregnancy and unsuccessful fertility treatment, Mother's Day is not a time for celebration for Leicester woman Ellie.
From the age of 16 to 35 Ellie's life was a "rollercoaster". It has taken her many years to come to terms with her fate. "I felt so tearful. When I used to see a happy family with children, I used to think, "Why can't that be me?"
"I didn't feel like a complete woman. We had a huge house but where was it all heading? I didn't feel like anything had a point. I felt empty."
Ellie coped by throwing herself into her career but she still felt resentment towards mothers who hit and swore at their children. She said: "Why is it that those who shouldn't have them have three or four and appear not to want them?"
Her marriage eventually collapsed and Ellie married again in her late 30s. She said: "As soon as I had met him my periods were so regular, I could put them in my diary.
"That had never happened to me before so I did think perhaps I had been with the wrong person. I think I could have conceived with my new man but he'd had a vasectomy."
Now at 48, Ellie has come to terms with her fate. "It's not an issue anymore. We can do what we like. I would be absolutely terrified if I had children now. With sex, drugs, violence, the whole caboodle - it would drive me mad."
"I do have a sister who's 15 years younger than me who has two children so I'm like a second mother to them. And I have my cats!" | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | |  | | | | | Be the first to comment on this video! | | | | | |
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