Poems from the great big Jersey poetry book. A collection of poetry from people in or from Jersey.

A shopping trolley has a mind of its own
just watch people use them and hear then all moan,
You push to the left and they go to the right
To make them go straight is a heck of a fight

You go for the veg, they go for the fruit
You tread on a grape and get juice on your suit
You go for cold meat and they knock over the tins
You go for the freezer, they scrape skin off your shins
You head for the wine racks, they squash flat all the bread
The loaves on the top fall all over you head;
You know that you need some, so head for the butter,
You knock someone’s leg and feel such a nutter.

You head for the check-out and load up the belt
You look round the shop, such a fool you have felt;
You fill up your bags and head for the door;
And swear that’s the last time you shop at that store.

You aim for the car that’s somewhere outside
You look for a space, the trolley to hide
A voice says “Hey Madam that’s not the right place”
“Good grief, see that look on his face!

When you get to your car, it’s got a flat tyre
and now you really begin to perspire;
You open the door, select the right tool,
By now you feel an even bigger fool.

The wheel-nuts are tight, your muscle is small
You see a young man and give him a call;
He comes running over, a smile on his face
He changes the wheel with such easy grace.

At last on the road, you heave a big sigh
With foot on the throttle, the car starts to fly,
You head for the corner, and then Oh! Such folly
You discover you’ve left all your goods in the Trolley.

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