BBC Radio Cumbria

Twas on a Monday morning, the Vikings came to call,
With horns upon their helmets, but no passports at all.

They looted and they pillaged, for many a pillaging week,
Then hopped it back to Norway - but the boat began to leak...

Oh, it all makes work for the ravening hordes to do...

Twas on a Tuesday morning, the boatwright came to call.
He polished up the dragon's head, and gave the keel a haul.

He sealed up all the leaking bits, and painted them with tar -
Then Icelandic pirates pinched the thing, with a saga-louts' "A-harrrr!"

Oh, it all makes work for the ravening hordes to do..

On Woden''s Day and Thor's Day, the Vikings had a dance,
So twas on a Friday morning, the Britons took their chance.

First thing after midnight, they opened up the hall,
Every pitchforked farmer standing in a hush behind the wall.

They chased them and they pronged them, then they waved them off to sea -
By which time it was 4 o'clock, and time to have some tea....

On Saturday and Sunday, the locals had a ball -
So twas on a Monday morning the Normans came to call...