The Revolution will NOT be scrutinized
Like most of the general public, I sometimes wonder what really goes on within that magical realm of expanse that is Russell Brand's mind. It's just that recently, since he's been away, I get the distinct impression that he now pictures himself as some sort of revolutionary leader in exile. Much like Napoleon was imprisoned on the island of Elba, maybe Russell too sees his role as that of a banned visionary on the verge of ushering in a new era of "Brand-dom" (able was I ere I saw.....Hawaii?).
To be fair, this isn't the first time that Matt and I have heard such reactionary talk from the man himself. A few of you may be familiar with the May Day riots in central London some years ago, when Russell tried to "stick it to The Man" on behalf of the people. In a bid to symbolise the relinquishing of all forms of consumerism, he decided to strip off his clothes and proudly exhibit his family jewels before London's Metropolitan Police Force.......however, they were not readily amused by his little visual analogy!
Well, shortly after that painful episode, Russell had another flash of inspiration to take a further stand against materialism. He assembled this motley crew of comedians, poets, actors and other performers with the intent of holding some sort of artistic street demonstration. What we hoped to achieve still isn't clear to this day, but we all assembled for this secret underground meeting to discuss a plan of action and try to clear up a few points of uncertainty. We weren't so much like the Black Panthers, we were more like the Beige Puddy Tats!
At the meeting, Russell answered several questions from the group:
Q: "So what exactly is this demonstration for?"
Russell: "We artists will be using our talents to take a stand against materialistic and shallow culture!"
Q: "And where will it be held?"
Russell: "Outside of all the big stores on Oxford Street!"
Q: "Why Oxford Street?"
Russell: "..err...because there's lots of nice girls who go shopping there(?)"
Q: "What happens if some of the stores offer us free stuff in a bid to move us on?"
Russell: "We will NEVER sell-out! We'll protest until the end! We'll die for our art!!!.... (However, if they're offering some nice little fancy boots... we might move on.... just a little bit!)"
Sadly, (as you may have guessed) there wasn't a second meeting, the anarchic dream was then put on hold when Russell had to go into re-hab. So who knows what subversive schemes he is cooking up for his return to these shores. With baited breath, we can only wait and see...
(Being a comic-book fan I had Spiderman 3 on my mind during the show, hence this week's poem:)
No More Heroes anymore
As Spider-Man swings through the city at night,
If we were true superheroes, think what we'd be like?
I reckon I'd favour Batman: the incognito attack-man,
Moving under the cover of darkness, pursuing females who dress like cats.....(damn!)
Matt plans on taking risks with "flying jackets" like Daredevil,
Enduring sniffles, facing whistles as he listens to Heavy-Metal,
The world is threatened...
...by demonic cockerels, boob-job yobs and Dog the Bounty Hunter,
Narcissistic Dick and the villanous tricks of the Evil Shop Master!
To combat such disaster, who could Russell be with all these G.I.'s on the scene?
An "ex-man" like Dame Edna or an "X-man" like Wolverine?
How about Obi-Wan-Kenobi, Teen-Wolf, or even Boba Fett?
More like: Hanging out with Spotty, for he's got to be Super-Ted!
i would have enjoyed being at this gathering.
woo first comment
no more "poems" please, mr gee.
Heh, sounds like Russ was quite the revolutionist! Despite the failure of the artistic event....
Paul, that's more than a little harsh, Mr Gee's poems are great! Especially given the time restraints under which Gee writes his poems, I doubt many could do much better. It's also in the way they're read, Mr Gee's tone and pitch creates a unique rythm.
Keep 'em up, Gee!
Tinyt
Hey Gee
Love the blog, love the poem
BUT........................................
As a man of words, I was surprised to see you put "baited" breath instead of "bated" breath
No need for the "i", unless of course you have had one too many worm sandwiches and are planning on using your breath to catch a fish!
xx
Mr. Gee, you are a god amongst men.
But where's the latest podcast... it's always so slow... still the old one up.
Mr. Gee, Flies from pole to pole,
calming all with his centred soul,
Watching from the wings and commenting,
encapsulating hours of heady jubilance,
with a STING!
Mr G, the ever ready, ever steady, man who will overthrow,
doubts of darkness, shadows of question
with his affermative, gracious glow.
Freind of Russell, allie to Mat, in the time of separation,
combatting, contradicting time zones,
helping to deliver a bit of continuity to the show.
When all is done and it never is,
the gang will go deeper and crash through more
it will be able to break throgh, turning back to this time for strength, for this you can all be sure.
The future is bright,
see the clouds, they are fluffy and light,
the sunbeams are shining from hearts that are doin what is pleasing in our sight.
We love you all.
That massive smile of Russsys could disarm a vicious dog. Mathew Morgan is a sweetheart, that no one can surpress, whos kindness to his mate is evident to all.
Keep it all goin you little thunder cats.
Keep dancing UP the cake with your canes and top hats.
BIG FAT JUICY KISSIES
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Just wanted to point out that Slimer from out of Ghostbusters is not the ghost of someone who was once alive (unlike, for example, the old librarian lady who turns into a frightmare at the start) but an entity coming through from another dimension or plane, like Zhoul and the Staypuft marshmallow man.
Cheers now, happy to help.
XXX
Great poem Gee!
I saw spiderman on Fri and thought of you.
xx kathy
No podcast this week (wibble).
It's not like I NEED to listen to it.. my week doesn't DEPEND on it or anything. There's other things I could do instead if I wanted to, I just haven't got around to doing them, OK.
My life's not THAT stressed at the moment - I'm not desperately struggling to cope with a work / study balance or anything like that.. (laughs nervously)
Anyway my 75-minute drive to work will probably pass JUST as quickly WITHOUT mascara running down my face from laughing.
The cutti Sark was burned down in a fire this morning!
How sad. A piece of British history going up in flames.
A small reflection of how our Iraqui fellows must feel while disposessed in their own land.
Watching as their rich historical heritage of ancient times of prosperity, is slowly turning into rubble. Erased forever by the 20th century war.
The Cutti Sark will possibly end up being entirely rebuilt, if the fire has caused permanent damage to the metal framework. So it will only have remnants of the original.
I want to make it clear that I do not endorse arson.
I was merely drinking my tea minding my own business when I heart about it on the Ken Bruce Radio show.
My son derives many usefull and intelligent facts from Pop Master and Steve Wrights Factoids.
On the History channel, they showed images of Germany after the Second World War, that looked like the set of Gone with the Wind, after the civil War had taken its toll.
The panorama of ruins.
Germany aggressed and were about to cause mayhem in Europe so they subsequently were bombed into oblivion. A justified act of retribution.
Little ole Iraque had done no such thing.
I do hope that their gorgeous,once dignified historical land will not be penalized for being the object of European error.
It is not wrong to feel compassion, towards a nation, that we are not officially at war with, they are not classed as our "enemy".
Iraque wil be a deep mark on our patriotic concience, we have no evident "just Cause".
if we continue the endevour, to positively justify our error in attacking them, occupying them, it will endlessly perpetuate the argument that it is and was and will be a legitimate move.
Not admitting that the error needs rectification.
Hands up baby hands up let the love, truth and good intention flow.
Us wealthy westerners can show our brothers good traditional hospitality while we possess their land.
Fighting for peace and stability.
If we cant do that, then let our poor boys come home.
This word INSURGENCE has become a blanket word, fair game and "Fire at will!"
What is it with us and empires, clod hoppering around the world predending to improve it, but actually causing untold harm and poverty!
Is Iraque the Westerners secret painting of Dorean Grey, hidden under a sheet in the attic? It seems like it.
British media present it in such a finite way. Keeping a mandate of only giving numbers of casualties and names of places.
Keeping it all managably sterile.
Are they afraid of challanging the ethics of it, with honesty and integrity? Those very words may present themselves as a bit of a challange.
Surely, no one is blinded by there bieng any misguided shred of national pride. Threatened to stay quiet, hiding behind "Support for the troops."
What a stink!!
But as long as Britain sustains itself and turns a blind eye about something to which it is intrinsicly envolved, it will negate responsibility, the worst atmosphere to allow harm to be done.
" Sorry me Lord, he pleads diminished responsibility. On grounds of not being in his right mind. He was undergoing a specific treatment at the time which had an enormously supporific effect, dulling his senses to the point of dillusional thinking.We hope that all responsibility will be nullified,me Lord.
At the time he thought he was the king and everything he touched turned to gold.
If he ever returns to his right mind, we will allow him to resume his position as guardian of all the fortunes of the west and further afield, but as it is we recomend that he be incarsarated and given protection from his own violent nature, in which he harms himself and others."
Is Iraque a symptom of failing democratic process. A smoke screen to a society that can only sustain itself by the aquisition of money and power.
The final sollution to the darker side of the nature of a supreme races determination to be top dog at all costs.
May Iraque become the standard of an altruistic mind set, that would enrich its object,Iraque is,nt beyond repair, if it is we can offer brotherly love and stand between them as non agressive peacemakers.
The utopian future in a parallel universe, would be for the immediate prospect of globalization proloferating benefits of resourses, to all corners of the world. As we raise ourselves up as the lords of our own realities.
Working towards pride in all the human family, turning to one another and allowing them to love us back.
As we evolve and intigrate, cross polinating societies,western and eastern, all continents joined in a melting pot, we must take care to keep the channels of exchannge clear and charitably imparcial.
Only a secret society of elite proffesionals are held privy to the redemptive plans for Iraque, through this war.
The rest of us commoners are held in some weird and dubious tyranny to an overpowering agenda. Presenting itself as a fet'a complis.
There is no honour in this war, Churchill was earnest admirable and honourable, wheras the minds behind this all, are mirky, dubiuos and distinctly dodgy.
As we are not defending ourselves, The lines are very unclear. We have inocent blood on our hands. Fighting to satisfy and protect gllobal teritorialism, by using primal methods.
Unforgivably the central towers of commerce were targetted and this unleashed a maimed disfigured spirit of vengeance.
We are not under the power of any dictatorial power.
We must think and embrace our British heritage of humanitarian progress, committing ourselves to benefit the parts of the world that we can and enrich our corporate souls.
If we refuse to allow our national and international failures to be laid bare, there will be no progress. Only when the house is built on foundations other than sand is there hope.
My boy asked me what I was writing so copiously.
So I started reading and he put his hands over his ears, telling me to stop.
It was so unnesesarily tedious and vacuous for him, it may well have the same effect on most people as it did on him.
What have you done allowing a platform for unstoppable forces!
Russell will say "Not in my Name" or on my radio 2 site TA!
Its such fun for me writing this. A voice from the wilderness.
Well it can go back to the wilderness I hear you say. Where all my bloggs end up in Blogg heaven with little alphabetical wings, whispy vapours of fragmented thoughts, fluttering about.
I have stitched myself up to be taken secretly in the night by the powers that be, who are extracting my details from google as we speak.They will send
round the men in black.
Thats ok because I love Will Smith.
Our nanny state could come into its own right, taking action like boycotting casinos,lotteries,Millionare and Make a loada Wad programmes. Condeming it as unviable and dead in the long term progress of western civilization.
As a good parent would say,
" Stay away from things that will corrupt you and take time out to see the world and broaden the mind by helping others less fortunate than yourself, as a charecter building exercise."
A wicked uncle would pretend to be a loving long lost relative with your best interests at heart,
" Go on Alladin, go down int o the cave of treasure and extract the worthless lamp, then Ill lock you in and leave you for dead."
Programmes like Blue Peter could get children aware and feeling envolved by sending presents and toys to the Iraqui children.
Alan Tichmarch could go there and do up the palace gardens, with Tommy ,like they did for Nelson Mandella. Then when the wars over they could be open to the public.
Comic relief could replace the soaps and we could watch the daily goings on in the real everyday lives of Africans, Iraquis and Indians. Reconditioning ourselves to break out of our oblivious mindset and ;learn to get used to the appeal of enjoying a little rather than alot.
Chelsea flower show could be staged in a third world slum, or a British council estate, then left there, to save carting it all into the bin at the end.
Nice bit of colour for the concrete jungle.
Laddettes and Lads could have14 pints a night and give the other 14 to the Iraqui neighbours and get to know them, rather than drinking 28 pints all to
themselves.
Hey waddya say, Hey, Wadda GUY!
Live a little.......
Theres just too much blogdoggery going on around here!
What a scandal!
The new photos of Russell are perfeccto! I esspecially like the one with the puss and the kicking b, underpants one. Just my cuppa tea, lovey. At last the big boy is taking notice of our pleas to have some photos, we can feel more in touch with his lifestyle, like a photo diary.. Isnt that Hawaiin baby gorgeous! Its a great photo with the tatood arm. Very arty.
I wish I could carry Russell and Mats loved child, but I feel it would be irresponsible, as I,m to old at 42.
We were talking to an old friend recently, he,s such a character. My friend was agonising to him about her sisters forthcoming wedding,where she will be expected to wear a bridesmaids dress. She said that she was worried that she would look fat in the gown.
So our old friend suggested she get a corset, backing up his suggestion by saying" Roger Moore wore one when he was playing James Bond." We howled.
He really likes to sit at home and watch old re runs of On the Busses and Please Sir. We laugh at his chosen passtime , but one time he said to my friend, " No, theres a bit of history there because , did you know that Reg Varney was the first person to use a cash machine"
Whenever we call him, he is always skeeming some coo.Theres a computer in every room and he,s really into gadgets.
He, s mad about his cats and when my friend was on the phone to him ,he said," The cat keeps asking me questions I just dont know the answers too!"
Ten years ago my friend left a calling card which his mum saw, saying if you want me anytime give me a call.
His Mum was apalled and said to Me ," What kind of a girl would do that!"
But when I call, his Mum says, " You know you can call here any time youre always welcome! ".
When she calls there now his Mum uses her infared Mum arial, and persistantly asks "whos that, youre on the phone to"
To which he replies, " never you mind Ma."
When I call him he says, hes got skeems and deals goin down. And ended up at Nick Kershaws place, and partied with those cats". Cats ? Who ever uses that expression these days?
You have to share the call with him checking things out on the computer, he,s really into getting copies of old 70s childrens programmes like Hectors house.
When my friend went out for a drink with him recently, there had to be a moments silence while he admired the wide screen TV stating the name and serial number. He saw my friends phone and she handed it to him. He went all anal like Jeremy Clarkson and turned the mobile over in his hand humming to himself, stating the numbers and name saying it was good standard make, nodding his head.
Its good to be in touch with old friends.
My frinnd went out with her Mum for a bike ride on Sunday. When I called and commended her on what a good idea it was to do that, she said that her Mum kept trying to overtake her.
I did identify with her Mum, because thats the sort of thing that I would do. What a plank I am!
National lottery- stealth tax for the poor!
Mega Casinos- The degraded world of Biffs Empire, in Back to the Future two. The terrible alter reality that Marty Mc Fly had to stop at all cost, in the fight of good over evil.
The passport office has an add on name now. Passport and identity office. Near £50 to get a passport nowadays. Paying for the forthcoming implementation of identity cards with all of their screens.
The future is in the hands of the people.
The people are in the hands of their own lifestyle desires,
slave or free.
Free to read what they like, liking to watch what they want.
Wanting to be told what they think.
Thinking they,d like to have a drink.
Drinking to make sence of what they think.
Escaping, confronting ,creatures of habit.
Driven by reflections of what they,re told they want.
All to have a sence of control and great self esteem, never letting go, of the rat race thats a furnace crying to be neverendingly stoked.
The satisfaction is held in the hand of the ability to not have need, so we must have the ability to be able to discard, reflecting the gift our world offers of choice.
If we can see our waste, we can see our face of consumption to give a sence of purpose, global warming could take over the collective concience. Its easier than looking to the unopened door of divinity,a place not to go as , to go there , a no entry sighn has been placed, and a misconseption that, the dress code would have the colours of Good Enough.
A crazy place, when to come into this world we came as a naked birth.