This article was first published in May 2021.
Hindsight is a wonderful thing. As we grow up, we learn from our mistakes, develop our personalities and discover who we are. If we were to write a letter of advice to our younger self, what would we tell them? What do we know now that we wish we knew then? What have we learned?
For this series of thought-provoking films, we asked eighteen young people to write a letter to their younger selves. This is Dear Younger Me.
Caolan: I don't know if you're going to believe this, but I promise everything gets so much better. Right now you're probably listening to My Chemical Romance with tears in your eyes, but guess what? All those people that bully you now, in a few years, they call you your chosen name, Caolan, without even thinking about it. You're going to come to the realisation that you're not non-binary, you're a trans man. It takes time for you to realise that and feel comfortable saying it out loud. But that's okay, you'll know when you're ready. And, while telling people is scary, it really is worth it.
You have a long, hard journey ahead of you. But, you're going to find plenty of ways to distract yourself. Pretty soon you fall in love with acting and find that being on stage is the best feeling in the world. When you're performing, nothing else matters.
Over the next few years you make the most incredible friends, and some of them are going to be a second family to you. You know that LGBTQ+ centre you go past every day? It's your second home now. There are people there that make you feel safe. That show you how to be a better person that love you for being yourself. Even people who look up to you. You get to be the older trans guy that you need right now. Unbelievable as it may seem, you're going to be so, so happy. Just keep going you will get there.
P.S. Turns out you also like boys – have fun with that.
All those people that bully you right now… in a few years will call you your chosen name – Caolan.
Caolan was unsure about his gender identity when he was younger, but came to the realisation that he's a trans man. In this Dear Younger Me, he tells his younger self that things will get better when he opens up to those around him. He will find his passion and he will make the most incredible friends.
If you need support
You should always tell someone about the things you’re worried about. You can tell a friend, parent, guardian, teacher, or another trusted adult. If you're struggling with your mental health, going to your GP can be a good place to start to find help. Your GP can let you know what support is available to you, suggest different types of treatment and offer regular check-ups to see how you’re doing.
If you’re in need of in-the-moment support you can contact Childline, where you can speak to a counsellor. Their lines are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
There are more links to helpful organisations on the BBC Bitesize Action Line page for young people.
Dear Younger Me: Qezz
If you wrote a letter to your younger self, what would it say? This is Qezz's letter.
Dear Younger Me: Hannah
If you wrote a letter to your younger self, what would it say? This is Hannah's letter.
Dear Younger Me: How letter-writing can help your mental health
Writing a letter to a younger version of you that went through a hard time can really help you - here's how.
