Why being single at Christmas is the best

Embracing me-time, onesie-wearing and cheeky snogs

Like Valentine's Day and New Year's Eve, Christmas can be a tricky time for singles.

Our Instagram feeds fill up with yuletide engagements and #boydonegood hashtags alongside pictures of perfect presents. Festive films leave us feeling like the season is all about ice skating with your loved one and gazing into each other’s eyes. It can be hard not to feel like Bridget Jones in a dodgy Christmas jumper with Mariah constantly warbling in the background. But a new study from Mintel suggests a majority of single women, and almost half of single men, are happy with their relationship status, external.

And I can see why. Personally, I think flying solo means a festive season like no other.

For many couples, Christmas is a logistical nightmare spent traipsing the country to see your nearest and dearest – and then doing the same for your partner's family. And families have a habit of asking the kinds of questions that don’t exactly promote romantic harmony.

“I love my girlfriend,” says Tom, 29. “But the questions from her family about when we're moving in together meant we spent all of Boxing Day last year arguing - and neither of us even wanted to move in together yet, anyway!”

For me, being single at Christmas means escaping the dreary visit to the in-laws and pulling on my onesie, fighting with my brother over the last pig-in-a-blanket and stealing the chocolate Christmas tree decorations. More fun than making polite conversation about house prices, in my humble opinion.

One of my very favourite Christmases involved spending the entire day and night at a London hotel with my mum, steadily ploughing our way through two bottles of champagne. It was the stuff of my festive dreams.

You should do whatever you find truly fulfilling at Christmas while you can. Then, years down the line, when you’re faced with all that extended family politics and more presents to deliver than Santa, you can hark back to the Christmas you spent giggling with friends, volunteering at a soup kitchen or lounging on a Thai beach - whatever does it for you.

“I love Christmas, but spending December 25th in Australia while travelling alone was an unforgettable experience that I will treasure forever,” says Rebecca, 35. “Doing it on my own boosted my confidence no end.”

Psychologist and sex educator Dr Andrea Pennington says Christmas is a time to, “reflect on your strengths and abilities and the progress you've made personally and professionally throughout the year".

Some relationships, especially new ones, come with unrealistic gifting goals.

“Presents can reveal a lot about how you feel in the relationship,” says Dr Andrea Pennington. “Disappointed with your blender when you’ve been dropping hints about an iPad? Smarting from splashing £300 on him, only to find out those earrings you spotted in his sock drawer were actually for his mum? Whether you’ve been together three weeks or three years, the presents you swap can set the tone for months and years to come,” she warns.

As someone who was once presented with a ring on Christmas Eve by a swaying ex-boyfriend fresh from an afternoon in the pub, I'm thrilled that this festive season won't be spent in panic that I'm being proposed to by a man I know isn’t Mr Right.

Plus, they don't call the first Monday in January ‘Divorce Day’ for nothing. The festive period is notorious for exposing the cracks in relationships, with thousands of couples dividing the baubles and planning their exits, external before the sales have even begun. I split with an ex on 28 December after a Christmas spent bickering and avoiding 'the talk' about where our relationship was (or wasn’t) going. I’m now a big advocate of getting break-up chats done and dusted long before the Oxford Street lights are turned on.

Being newly single at Christmas means you can throw yourself into partying and comfort eating. And, when you’re single, you can just focus on treating yourself. After all, you deserve it, amirite?

Once December arrives, the normal rules of dating do not apply – so, if you’re in the mood for romance, the season is your friend. Right now, 5pm on a Wednesday is as good a time as any to swoop in on the hot guy from Marketing and suggest after-work drinks. And if you’ve been looking for a reason to message your ex to see if there's still a spark, there’s nothing like a ‘Merry Christmas’ WhatsApp to test the waters, while safe in the knowledge that come New Year no one will remember anyway.

Dating coach James Preece thinks it’s a great time for meeting people. “The Christmas period is the best time for being single,” he says. There are lots of parties full of people you might not normally talk to, and, he says, “You have something that couples don’t have – freedom! So get out there and enjoy it.”

And if that doesn’t work out, Tinder is full of fresh faces in the New Year. Whoever said January was dull?

Illustrations by Alexandra Bowman