 Visual stick for referee Meier after the Campbell decision |
England may be out of Euro 2004 and their supporters downcast, but the plucky English sense of humour has kicked in to cheer the nation. The day after Sven Goran Eriksson's men were denied a semi-final place by Portugal, faked joke images arrived in email inboxes to poke fun at the loss.
Captain David Beckham's penalty miss and disputed decisions by Swiss referee Urs Meier bore the brunt of jibes.
Meanwhile a supermarket chain offered free eye tests to Swiss nationals.
Asda said it was making the pledge after Mr Meier's decision to disallow England defender Sol Campbell's last-minute goal.
An email entitled "Urs Meier is waiting to hear from you" was also doing the rounds.
The message contained a link to the feedback page of the referee's website, although no English opinions had been published.
 Advertising campaigns prove an easier target than the goal |
As England supporters sat deflated at their desks, a selection of faked football photos were exchanged. One email, with the subject "That explains it", featured Meier arguing with Campbell while holding a guide-dog to heel.
Other images focussed their sarcasm on David Beckham's missed penalty.
In a twist on a sports advertising campaign, he was pictured taking tips from England rugby hero Jonny Wilkinson on how to sail it right over the bar.
Wilkinson advises: "And to win, I just kicked the ball over the bar", as Beckham memorises: "ball... bar... over... win..."
Another picture played on his complaints about the surface after his penalty-kick miss - it showed a mole, complete with molehill, popping out from under the ball.
Photos from Beckham's book-launch also came in for treatment by the graphics experts.
 David Beckham's failed penalty kick is fodder for picture-fakers |
My Side, his autobiography, was exchanged for a tome he might reach for at Real Madrid: "Zinedine Zidane's Penalty Taking for Dummies". A doctored advert from a major credit card campaign was also circulated, alongside a picture of the missed spot-kick.
It reads: ""Hotel for the missus: �1,000. Sunblock for Brooklyn: �30. Missing two penalties in a major competition: Priceless."
The losing side and the referee were the focus of most of the jokes but the Portuguese players did not escape to victory completely unscathed.
Cristiano Ronaldo was featured in a less than flattering portrayal of English opinion on European playing styles.
A moving email graphic showed him performing a series of stepovers, before an opponent kicks the ball away.
Seconds later, unchallenged and untouched, he falls over.
Have you heard a cheering England joke? Been emailed the perfect picture? Send us your comments and images.
Here is a selection of the comments received so far:
A man is walking his three-legged dog in the park when he comes across a lamp. He rubs it and out pops a genie. The genie says "I'll grant you one wish." "Can you make my dog win Crufts?" asks the man. "What with only three legs? Wish again." the genie retorts. "OK" says the man, "Can you make England win Euro 2004 then?" The genie ponders a while before saying "let's see that dog again....."
Lyn Hallett, Surrey, UK
Oxo were going to bring out a Euro 2004 commemorative cube painted red, white and blue in honour of the England squad. But it was a laughing stock and crumbled in the box.
Wazza, London
Q: What's the difference between the England team and a tea-bag?
A: The tea-bag stays in the cup longer.
Martin, London, England
I received these jokes in my mailbox today. I must say I was heartbroken by yesterday's game, and at first I took offence to the images as I don't believe any one team member should be singled out and blamed. Anyway, having read it on the news now, I guess it has lightened me up a little. I'm sure no one really blames Beckham, it's just the way we deal with bad news isn't it? Take it on the chin. Oh well... bring on the World Cup!
Jess, Slough, UK
Q: What do a three-pin plug and the England football team have in common?
A: They are both useless in Europe!
Martin, London, England
A man meets a friend and sees that his car is a total write-off and covered with leaves, grass, branches, dirt and dried blood. He asks his friend: "What's happened to your car?" "Well," the friend responds, "I ran over David Beckham". "OK," says the man, "that explains the blood... But what about the leaves, the grass, the branches and the dirt?" "Well, he tried to escape through the park."
Debbie Taylor, Southport, England
I was feeling particularly distressed over the match, but the Jonny and David e-mail was doing the rounds at work, and it brought a smile to my face!
Anna, Wiltshire, England