Young children do not suffer if their mothers work, a study by Bristol University suggests.
Researchers traced the development of 14,000 children in the south west of England over a ten year period.
They discovered that there was no difference between the development of children of working mothers and of those who stayed at home.
The study also showed that children who spent the first three years of life being looked after in nurseries suffered "no measurable psychological or behavioural ill effects because of their mothers' absence".
Do you agree with this research? Are you a working mother?
This debate is now closed. Read a selection of your comments below.
Your reaction
 They miss out on all the unique phases of their children's development  |
It's a shame that most mothers are not in a position to stay at home with their babies and young children because they miss out on all the unique phases of their children's development. It is also a shame that the quality of someone's life is judged by the amount of educational accolades they achieve. There is more to a well-rounded person than high academic achievement - kindness and the ability to love would be quite a good measurement.
Jo, Brighton, England
The concept of the housewife at home caring for the kids while waiting for dad to come home is fairly recent. Women (especially poor women) have always worked, the difference is they could depend on mum, or auntie or some other relative to look after the kids and it wasn't as obvious what was happening. These days gran is probably out in the workplace too. My son went into day care age 8 months. He's bright he's sociable, he's a pleasure to take anywhere at 13. All credit to EVERYONE who has helped bring him up - me, his dad, his step mum, nursery staff, teachers, the scouting organisation....
Jackie, Australia/ UK
It isn't the fact that parents work that has led to the decline in children's behaviour, it's the selfishness of how parents spend their free time these days. My mum stayed at home and my dad worked - every weekend, we would go out for at least one whole day as a family. Today it seems that parents are too interested in themselves.
Srinu, Kuwait
Our children's' attendance at nursery has developed them into sociable youngster |
Both my wife and I work in order to live rather than survive. We found that when my wife's pay stopped after our first child that we were basically skint. As soon as an unexpected expense was incurred we were struggling. We are now both working and are marginally better off than we were before after paying two sets of nursery fees. However we feel that our children's' attendance at nursery has developed them into sociable youngsters, with great respect for others. We cherish our time together at week-ends and in the evenings, but feel that our kids have the best of both worlds.
Ian, UK
I notice that the majority of people advocating that mothers stay at home to look after the children are men. Would these men be happy if the roles were reversed and they were expected to stay at home all day with the children?
Helena, UK
For me, going back to work when my daughter was 8 months old was the hardest thing I've ever had to do but staying at home was not an option - financially it is absolutely essential for me to work. We opted for day nursery because we believed that our daughter would benefit from it. No one can take the place of a child's parents but I do not believe that it is harmful for children to spend some time away from them. Is it so bad for children to discover that there is a world outside the home?
Sam, UK
Working mothers don't always have a choice |
Working mothers don't always have a choice. No I don't feel guilty - I feel proud of the way my two sons have grown up. One is just taking his final exams at Uni for a very difficult degree, and the other starts Uni this autumn. Neither has ever caused me or anyone else a problem - unlike some children who come from 'normal' families....
Lesley Wurwal, England
It isn't the fact that parents work that has led to the decline in children's behaviour; it's the selfishness of how parents spend their free time these days. My mum stayed at home and my dad worked - every weekend, we would go out for at least one whole day as a family. Today it seems that parents are too interested in themselves.
Sandy, UK
You spend your time on your priorities. If work is a higher priority than children, how will they be well brought up? Some parents both work because they have to, but others do so because they think that is what everyone does these days, or because they don't care enough about their children to sacrifice their lifestyle. Working fathers and mothers shouldn't feel guilty. They should just do the right thing for their children.
Peter , UK
I am a working mother of two boys aged 12 and 8. I don't work simply for the "luxuries", I go to work through necessity, we simply wouldn't be able to afford to pay all the bills if I didn't. Why do people feel they have the right to make you feel so guilty for that? There appears to be some urban myth that working mothers really have it all; government assistance, luxurious lifestyles, etc. Sadly, this is untrue.
Mandy Geary, Essex, UK
Yes, the two parents need to be there for the children, but how this is achieved should be up to them. Loving, stable homes are far more important than who works etc. And despite what the happy rose coloured view of the world is, money may not bring long-term happiness, but happy stable homes are more likely to form when the family is free of the stresses and strains brought on by constant debt.
Robbie, UK
My mother stayed at home with myself and my brother. When she went back out into the workplace she had to start at the bottom of the ladder all over again. Now she is only left with maybe fifteen years of working life- what kind of an old age pension will she get out of that! At home mothers are undervalued and more should be done to give mothers a reason (other than adoration of their babies) to stay at home throughout the child's formative years.
Kate, UK
As usual the focus (and blame) in child rearing is on the mother again |
As usual the focus (and blame) in child rearing is on the mother again. It takes 2 to bring a child into the world and we should hold father's just as responsible for the welfare of the child as well as celebrate their contribution to bringing up children.
Lesley Taylor, Britain
I think working parents are the cause for the decline in behaviour of the youth today. The childcarers are not allowed to discipline the children and neither do the parents as they are never there. Maybe we should not class it as bad behaviour, just children trying to get attention from their parents. If a single mum was to neglect her children the way working parents do, the Social Services would be there in a shot.
Phil, UK
Why is it that working mothers get financial support from the Government for having their children looked after but childcarers who look after their children get nothing.
Dave G, Dorset UK
If a woman wants to work, let her work. No-one questions whether it is right for the father to go off to work, leaving the mother to stay at home with the baby. Companies should be made to install day-care facilities in their work places so that greater equality between the sexes can be achieved.
Lizzie, Scotland
After reading all the comments from the working parents expressing what wonderful, articulate, intelligent and highly sociable children they have I would like to congratulate their child carers on bringing the children up so well. I wonder how the parents would feel if they could take some of the credit for this.
Nancy, UK
I was a working mother who has now given up work. When I worked I had more time for the children as I paid someone to do the household chores. Now as a full time housewife I find I have less time and tolerance. In fact my daughter recently asked me when I was going back to work as she missed the cleaner who always put her teddies on the right shelves and picked up all the Lego. I must admit I do miss work and the social contact with people other than mothers of my children's friends.
Carol, England
There is no right or wrong |
My wife has returned to work and our daughter has since spent time with family and a childminder (who has other children) and we have the most beautiful, bright, sociable and loving daughter that we could have ever of dreamed of. I would defy anyone to argue that my daughter has missed out because we both work. My daughter receives no less love, care, attention, development and whatever else you may feel you think you know she has missed out on as a result of us returning to work. Mothers, whether or not you decide to stay at home or go back to work, good luck! for in my opinion there is no right or wrong.
Glenn Durkin, England
Did they test any teenagers? Only at this age can the psychological damage be assessed. Who were these "researchers" - the same sort of politically motivated social workers who failed Victoria Climbie? Did they ask any adults of broken or single parent homes, who have had the time to reflect on their childhood, or lack of it? Children have both a need and a right to have at least one of their parents around for them most of the time. Why do people insult or disparage my wife just because she sacrifices her "career" for our children?
Vig, UK
I am expecting my first child later this year. I am the main bread winner. I have a degree and a good job which I want to continue. I will return to work when my child is 6 months old because I think that is what is best for my child, we need the money (we live in London) and more importantly I need the stimulation that work gives me. Will i feel guilty NO NOT AT ALL.
Rhyannon, London
It's a moot point when economic circumstance forces such a high proportion of those mothers to seek work. Would somebody like to explain to me why the tax system allows a working couple each earning �15,000 to keep more of their earnings than a family where one parent works and earns �30,000? That seems like a clear case of government discouraging traditional family arrangements.
Graham, UK
There are advantages and disadvantages to everything. The advantage for children going to nursery is that they get to interact with other children and learn valuable social skills. A child who's at home with his mum will pick up other skills. The important message here is that all parents need to spend a lot of quality time with their children, whether they have them all day or only in the evenings and weekends. Whatever reason people have for going out to work or staying at home, when the kids are around it is they, not the parents, who come first.
Christine, UK
It is a fact of life that many mothers must go out and earn to support their child. Let's face it, in the case of single parents, they get criticised often enough for not working. What is important is that both at day care and in the home, there is a high level of interaction with the child. If the child is read to, talked to, and loved, he or she will develop just as well whether the mother goes out to work or not.
Sven, UK
Research based on self-completed questionnaires should be taken with a massive pinch of salt |
Research based on self-completed questionnaires should be taken with a massive pinch of salt. Those completing the questionnaires are unlikely to be objective in their assessment of either themselves as parents or of their children.
Paul Buddery, Australia
As soon as the focus for the mother becomes anything other than the family, it is not just their children that lose out, but the society as a whole begins to unravel, as is so patently seen in the Western capitalistic society of today. Sensible mothers are the lynchpins of families, and families are the building blocks of the society.
Jacob Benjamin, Scotland
Working mothers should not feel guilt, if their intent is to inject needed money into the home. However, if the money is for extras, wanted luxuries, then they should consider ceasing work outside the home and give their children all the nurturing possible. The more loving eye to eye contact parents have with their very young children, the more intelligent the child. I personally feel that the Bristol University's 'theory' is flawed. They just might have accidentally refused to let common sense interfere with their double blind experiments.
Brian Houston, Canada
Several contributions to this debate have sounded very critical of the mother where she has employment. Have any of these contributors stopped to consider that the salary of the second parent (after child-minding costs) pays for a decent home in which to raise children? With current high house prices it is regularly essential for some form of second salary to pay the mortgage. To me that is a case of necessity, not selfishness.
Roger C, UK
I have nothing for praise for those parents that work and manage a home life. My mother stayed at home, however I feel that this just left her so out of touch with the workplace that she found it impossible to get a good job later in life, either from lack of training or employees feeling that staying at home and being a mother was not good enough "experience" for a job.
Rachael, UK
Why should it be seen as so damaging that they spend time with someone other than their mother? |
Why should it be seen as so damaging to children, that they spend time with someone other than their mother? From the age of five they do this anyway - in school! If a nursery is doing things correctly, a child will be learning social skills and beginning some academic skills before they hit school. Worked for me - the first words I had to learn for reading once I hit reception were window, weather and together, whereas many of my counterparts, who hadn't attended the school nursery that I had, were learning the, me and it.
Helen Shepherd, UK
Mothers should decide themselves if they want to work. It's a good thing they do, instead of doing the school run and claiming benefits, churning out kids paid for by the state until there's no tomorrow.
El, Birmingham, UK
I work, my wife stays at home to look after my daughter. This is our choice and we accept that we have lost one income. If people want to give their cash to nurseries then let them. It all sounds very good to let someone else look after your kids until you hear stories of children waking up in the middle of the night screaming for their nursery worker rather than Mummy or Daddy. I know this happens because my sister-in-law works in a nursery!
Tony, UK
ALL mothers work, whether they get paid for it or not |
Can we please stop referring to "working mothers"? ALL mothers work, whether they get paid for it or not. I stayed home when my children were small. I later went back to full-time work and was glad of the rest! Life in an office is way easier and less stressful than coping with babies and toddlers.
Mrs S M Burns, Wales
Call me old fashioned but throughout history, it's been the mother that has cared for the children, whilst the father has gone to work. I believe this is still the best way for children to be brought up, though I also believe it works perfectly well with the roles reversed. Sadly, today's consumer society and single parent families make this way of bringing children up very hard. A friend of mine is a nursery nurse (appalling wage I might add) and she recently had an 8 week old child enrolled at her nursery. You can't honestly tell me that is a civilised way in which to bring a child up?
Rob Forrester, England
Let me get this right... Because the children apparently emerged psychologically unscathed, it's OK for a mother to dump her small child on a minder and go and make money? That strikes me as a thin and specious argument for the working mother of an infant to use, in order to justify her abrogation of parental responsibility.
Chris Hunter, England
As soon as my wife went out to do a full time degree course the criticisms started. First from friends and family, closely followed by the teachers of our children who wasted no opportunity in telling us how her "irresponsibility" would damage the kids. We always knew this wasn't the case and the kids' performance proved us right, along with this new research. I'm sending a copy to each of the narrow-minded and archaic thinkers we have encountered in the education system.
Dave Hay, England
She is intelligent, articulate and highly sociable |
My daughter has just turned two and I went back to a full-time job when she was seven months old. She goes to a fabulous day nursery. She is intelligent, articulate and highly sociable. Her father and I take equal share of her care and the housework. She gets both quality play time and quiet story times. We do lots of arts and crafts at the weekends. If I was at home with her all day, I would be bored and frustrated.
Lisa T, UK
My mother didn't work - she stayed at home all day. I was actually embarrassed of this because I felt she wasn't achieving anything with her life and I would have respected her more if she had gone out to work and developed her education. She wasn't able to offer me any support or understanding in my pursuit of a career because she failed to understand the world of business, or in fact, very much of the world that existed beyond our home's four walls.
Catherine, UK
Our son has attended nursery full-time from the age of 14 weeks - he was three last week. My husband and I receive many compliments on how sociable, caring and good natured our son is. The time that we do spend with him is quality time - reading books, doing puzzles, walking in the woods, swimming etc - it is time which we all enjoy and look forward to. There are very few tantrums and tears. I feel nurseries provide opportunities for children which they may not have access to at home. I know I would not let my son paint a picture using cooked spaghetti as his brush - at nursery this is run of the mill.
Kate, UK
What on earth is there to feel guilty about? |
I work for a housing association and my three-year-old son proudly tells people that "mummy helps people who haven't got a home to live in". Our kids are encouraged to develop independence and self-confidence from an early age. I know a number of non-working mums who suffer with depression, feel they are undervalued, are constantly on at their kids and who can't wait to palm them off to their fathers when they step through the door in the evening. So what on earth is there to feel guilty about?
Anonymous, UK
Well, something is wrong with our kids, although I don't think it's the fault of working mums. I do think parents need to be more interested in their kids though, speak to them more, and take an active role in their education. Excuse me if I sound old fashioned - I'm only 23!
Russ, UK
As a working father I say that mothers ought to be encouraged to go to work - far better than staying at home whilst their brains atrophy, on the spurious grounds their children need them. Also it gives them something a bit more interesting to talk about other than what the other kids' mothers at school are doing!
John, UK
Yes it is hard for a parent to leave their baby in the care of another |
No-one ever asks whether a working father should feel guilty and they shoulder the burden of care too. A professional childminder or nursery is just as capable of stimulating a child's development as its parent. Yes it is hard for a parent to leave their baby in the care of another, but the child becomes well socialised by contact with others, makes friends and in some cases receives a better education than they might receive at home. You may as well ask whether stay at home parents should feel guilty about not sending their kids to nursery full-time!
Fiona, UK
Of course working mothers should feel guilty, and mothers who say at home should feel guilty. Making mothers feel guilty whatever they do is one of this country's most flourishing industries. Heaven forbid that mothers should feel comfortable with the choices they make and anyway, the next generation has to have someone to blame for whatever goes wrong in their lives. Mothers are the perfect choice.
Rosemary Chamberlin, England
In January I gladly left my job, permanently to have my much longed for nine-week-old son. If you can afford not to return to work then I think it is preferable to raise your children yourself. Life is short - you should enjoy every minute you can with your children. My mother gave up work to raise my brother and I - I am grateful that I spent so much time with her. It certainly had no detrimental effect on my brother or myself. I agree with Rosemary that it seems to be acceptable to continually hound mothers - only this morning I switched on the television to be told that I MUST breastfeed (another debate!). We can't win!
Mia, UK
If you can't afford to have children without working, then don't have them, it's as simple as that. Too many people want their cake and eat it, they treat children as fashion accessories, they want the cute baby in the pram but they find the hum-drum day to day responsibilities boring and would rather go out to work.
David, England
Yes I felt guilty for leaving my child and going to work, but it was not my intention as David stated to have my cake and eat it. I wanted a child because it was as nature intended. Unfortunately I live in an area where the average take home pay is well under �200 a week as do other people and no I don't get any benefits as we are just over the threshold. My son has grown to be a very loving confident child as a result of mixing with others. If anything he is more sociable than one or two I know who have stay at home mothers.
Sharon, Wales
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